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if i have sole custody can i do this without contacting him?

Posted by on Aug. 26, 2013 at 2:43 PM
KT
  • 44 Replies

my dd really wants to have my last name. she doesnt remeber her father and im not too sure if she even really understands that my df isnt her real dad even though we talk about the times that me and her were alone so to speek and about us having our own house(which is her biodads house). she thinks that we lived with my bestie(she thought that all on her own) she remembers my bestie being there all the time when we lived at her biodads, but he was hardly there. he was out partying and such. but anyway, since he still has rights, no visitation or anything, do i have to have his permission to change her last name?

by on Aug. 26, 2013 at 2:43 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Courtney610
by Courtney on Aug. 26, 2013 at 4:42 PM
It would be best to contact a lawyer.
cupcake_mom
by KT on Aug. 26, 2013 at 4:57 PM
I don't have money for a lawyer

Quoting Courtney610:

It would be best to contact a lawyer.
IncognitoOne
by Silver Member on Aug. 26, 2013 at 4:59 PM

Yes. He'd have to sign over his rights in order for her to be adopted.

I had a friend go through this very thing. Luckily, he was happy to sign over his rights to get out of paying back child support. We're in NC.

cupcake_mom
by KT on Aug. 26, 2013 at 5:02 PM
I don't want my df to adopt her yet. I just want her to have my maiden name. My last name now

Quoting IncognitoOne:

Yes. He'd have to sign over his rights in order for her to be adopted.

I had a friend go through this very thing. Luckily, he was happy to sign over his rights to get out of paying back child support. We're in NC.

lesalmi
by Member on Aug. 26, 2013 at 5:02 PM
yes, sole custody or not, he has rights to her you have to have his permission. And you can call any law office and they will answer a simple question like that over the phone. Does df want to adopt her? That might be an option
cupcake_mom
by KT on Aug. 26, 2013 at 5:08 PM
He wants to eventually, but he wants it to be a thing him and my dd both want. I really just want her to have my last name i have now. But if i have to contact her bio dad i don't see it happening. He will never sign his rights over or allow something like this, even though he hadn't had any contact with get in almost 3 years and most likely never will. He hasn't seen his son in over 6 years and still won't let his mother do what i want to do or let her new hubby adopt him even though he (stepdad) had been there for 4 years

Quoting lesalmi:

yes, sole custody or not, he has rights to her you have to have his permission. And you can call any law office and they will answer a simple question like that over the phone. Does df want to adopt her? That might be an option
lesalmi
by Member on Aug. 26, 2013 at 5:19 PM
I would wait then. If he has nothing to do with his kid you can still go thru with it, its just harder. My step dad adopted me when i was in 2nd grade, i hadnt seen my bio dad since i was 2 years old. Its a little tougher but is doable. I would wait until that point. Idk what state your in tho so i would just call a lawyer and ask. they will give you that info free of charge over the phone


Quoting cupcake_mom:

He wants to eventually, but he wants it to be a thing him and my dd both want. I really just want her to have my last name i have now. But if i have to contact her bio dad i don't see it happening. He will never sign his rights over or allow something like this, even though he hadn't had any contact with get in almost 3 years and most likely never will. He hasn't seen his son in over 6 years and still won't let his mother do what i want to do or let her new hubby adopt him even though he (stepdad) had been there for 4 years



Quoting lesalmi:

yes, sole custody or not, he has rights to her you have to have his permission. And you can call any law office and they will answer a simple question like that over the phone. Does df want to adopt her? That might be an option

nerdymom28
by Silver Member on Aug. 26, 2013 at 5:24 PM

 If he's on the birth certificate, I would imagine you have to get his permission, custody or not.

Rachael-Dawn
by Bronze Member on Aug. 26, 2013 at 5:28 PM
Yes. Sole custody is just sole custody. He has to sign over his rights. Although if he agrees to simply change her last name then all yall have to do is file a paper with both of yalls signatures with the change.
MamaBear2cubs
by Nikki on Aug. 26, 2013 at 10:43 PM

I think so also.


Quoting nerdymom28:

 If he's on the birth certificate, I would imagine you have to get his permission, custody or not.



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