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pregnant wife feeling alone

Posted by on Oct. 6, 2013 at 10:57 PM
  • 12 Replies
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Hello ladys im Tiffany and this is my 3rd pregnancy. lm 5mths and 7 days. Im Married (3yrs) my husband works 10 hour days...comes home go up stairs and watch tv until I bring him dinner. I try asking him bout his day but it's always "it was ok" This is his daily routine for the past 4mths. And its making me really upset. I clean every day, dinner ready every night. Take care of our 2yr old and 7yr old when he get home from school. Help him with homework. And my husband dont clean, or clean up behind himself, which makes more work for me being pregnant, rarely help me with our 2yr and 7yr and wont spend time with me or the kids!!! I have tryed talking to him but he say im nagging him. When I ask for a little help. I just feel alone and sad :( or am I prolly over reacting because I'm pregnant
by on Oct. 6, 2013 at 10:57 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MamaBear2cubs
by Nikki on Oct. 6, 2013 at 11:10 PM
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hugs

ashesleigh
by Member on Oct. 6, 2013 at 11:10 PM
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Some men dont understand that women especially need a little more than no conversation. Change up the routine. make him get his own plate or something. I dont want to cause an argument but in my opinion something needs to change. my hubby works 12 hour days and we talk while we eat dinner. we make time for each other because its important to realize you are also man and wife not just mom and dad.
krn210
by Member on Oct. 6, 2013 at 11:15 PM
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So sorry. I hate when I feel that way. Your hubby is lucky to have you. Hugs to you. 

abcortez
by on Oct. 6, 2013 at 11:24 PM
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It's so hard to make husbands understand what we are going through. I just had our second child 7 weeks ago, and its been hard ever since.  I been back to work already for 3 weeks. If i dont pick up around the house it doesnt get done. everytime i try to talk to him about i feel he turns it around and puts it all on me.

I dont think you are over reacting, i think our husbands just need to be more compassionate about the situations and they need to step it up a nooch.

niknik0212
by on Oct. 6, 2013 at 11:27 PM
Your so right. Every time I try to talk to him he say im nagging .....ugh....
abcortez
by on Oct. 7, 2013 at 12:59 AM
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it gets extremely annoying when he says im nagging. I sometimes just bottle it all. I once had a break down and he finally understood. But it didnt take long for things to go back to normal. I hate that it take a total break down for things to change.

niknik0212
by on Oct. 7, 2013 at 1:03 AM
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Right... I'm so used to it now...after 100 or more talks..... When he only change for a few days I don't even bother trying  anymore :( I'm pregnant with crazy emotions running crazy he could at least he ughhh....I just want out of the marriage because he is like this

Quoting abcortez:

it gets extremely annoying when he says im nagging. I sometimes just bottle it all. I once had a break down and he finally understood. But it didnt take long for things to go back to normal. I hate that it take a total break down for things to change.



abcortez
by on Oct. 7, 2013 at 1:24 AM
1 mom liked this

i've thought about the same thing, walking away and just letting everything go. I think of that then i always see the good things and i never leave. My husband watches the kids for me to get things done around the house sometimes, which is good, but when i want to just have a moment to myself he doesnt,.

mamashley
by on Oct. 7, 2013 at 11:38 AM
1 mom liked this

I agree with ashesleigh. Change things up a bit. Tell him that you would like to do family dinners, and make it about the kids. That it's good for the kids to have a chance to talk to both of you and to see you model appropriate and desired behavior (like manners). That may help you get some conversation. And make a chore chart. I've given up on the thought that men will ever do cleaning *our* way. But your 7 year old could help clear the table and rinse dishes after dinner. Good luck mama!

hugging

fightgirl038
by Member on Oct. 7, 2013 at 9:35 PM

I can completely relate. My DH used to be that way. After what seemed like a million conversations, it finally sunk it. He took a week of vacation one time and realized after that, that what I do for this family was a lot more than he thought. He has even recently admitted that he probably is glad he is working verses staying home and taking care of all the things I take care of. The kids were fussing all day long. So it took him spending a week with us to fully understand what I go through. He does every once in awhile go through phases of not being completely nice and makes me feel more like a slave than an equal as far as the housework goes. But its not as bad as it used to be. So just make him live your life for a week and see how long he survives.


My DH was like that, and would even say so back in the day that I had it easy with 3 small kids and that I didn't do anything. But once that week happened he realized I did more than he realized. So just make him live your life for a week and see if things don't change.

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