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Marriage Question

Posted by on Dec. 26, 2013 at 10:28 PM
  • 9 Replies
My mother and I were discussing a family friend and his girlfriend and their possible engagement. Now I would like to ask a question....when does a girl stop wondering when her boyfriend will propose and take action?

Let me explain. This friend has been with his girlfriend for 5 years. They do not live together. He flunked out of college and has finally gotten a real job. She just finished college and is becoming a teacher. He bragged over the summer about proposing. Often with her in ear shot.

My mother is saying that an engagement ring is expensive and that he just got a real job. He is 24. That other people that get engaged have good jobs and can move out. I said 5 years and she wants marriage and he is flip flopping. If he wanted to get married, he would of found a way.

Now I get this isn't our issue or whatnot. But what I want to know is when does a girl stop waiting and make her wishes known?
by on Dec. 26, 2013 at 10:28 PM
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by on Dec. 26, 2013 at 10:37 PM

That's a good question when a good answers cones up let me know. Lol. My last boyfriend I was with for 5yrs that didn't work out. Now I've been with the father of my kids for going on 4yrs. Its never really be discussed.

by Silver Member on Dec. 26, 2013 at 10:46 PM
I have been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years, he works and I stay home. We just bought a house together and live as if we're married. We haven't made it official because of several reasons, mostly to do with kids and such. In my heart, he's my husband and we make it work. A lot of people will argue that we're wrong and I'm dumb for sticking around but I know what I feel.
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by Member on Dec. 26, 2013 at 11:15 PM
I didnt agree with my mom's point of that he is 24 years old and just getting a real job. I know people that work full time and go to school. My boyfriend didn't go to college but at 19 he had a full time job. A full time job that paid for his apartment, his car, his bills and so on. It is the family friend's problem he hasnt done much with his life.
by on Dec. 26, 2013 at 11:16 PM

I never really had to deal with this problem. My DH, BF at the time, told me he planned to marry me the night he took my virginity, AFTER he had done so. He said to give him 8 months and we would get married. Well, it didn't happen quite like that but 10 months after that night he proposed officially though we both knew we were going to get married long beforehand.

  Good luck to your friend!

by on Dec. 26, 2013 at 11:18 PM

I wouldn't be a girl friend for that long as an adult. She could propose but at the same time, he obviously isn't in any hurry to get married. If I were her, I would probably move on.

by on Dec. 26, 2013 at 11:56 PM

When she is tired of waiting.

by on Dec. 27, 2013 at 4:20 AM
I was with dh 5 years before we got married. We lived together and had a daughter before. We've been married for one year and it's hard...we waited because of many different reasons....
by Mandy on Dec. 27, 2013 at 8:19 AM

 I waited 4 almost 5 years. I would have waited much longer, but my husband called me to married him last year on July 4th. I am married now and we already had a daughter together. So I am pretty much happy. But if we didn't have a child together I would still have waited. Some just have issues on the that. And being that he is 24 years old maybe he isn't ready. My husband is 35 years old with already one marriage under his belt that is why he waited to get married again.

But I would marry him 10 times over if he wanted too. :)

by on Dec. 27, 2013 at 11:02 AM
I would have ended it already.

I wouldn't continue to even date someone who flunked out of school and couldn't keep a real drop. He can't take care of himself, let alone buy a ring and get married.

My max would be 3 years. If we weren't engaged by then, I'd be gone.

After engagement I think my max would be 2 years until marriage.

I have a very strong "$hit or get off the pot" philosophy.
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