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stay at home mom... is that enough

Posted by on Jul. 21, 2014 at 12:30 PM
  • 21 Replies
Hi I am a 23 year old stay at home mom of a 18 month old wild little boymy fiance works and he's going to construction school right nowhe brings home all the money but sometimes I feel like I don't do enough or he makes it seem like I do enoughI do take care of our son and clean the house cooking breakfast lunch and dinner in his work clothes and other clothes laundry everything I think I stay at home mom Should i dont go out and get "turnt up" lol (party hard) like most of my girl friends that I have kids do I use to work 2 job but had to stop do to me losing my eyesight in my right eye . Just i fell some type of guilt because he brings the money home I dont like asking for money to do a little some for myself like a pedicure or getting my eyebrows done I feel selfish just for asking he says he doesn't mind and that I should askI don't know there's just something always holds me back from asking maybe it's pride or something like that.well thanks for reading and I guess I just needed someone to talk or vent to . And if going through the same thing please comment ..... thanks again
by on Jul. 21, 2014 at 12:30 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mama2b100808
by Mandy on Jul. 21, 2014 at 12:33 PM
1 mom liked this

Oh hun! I know what you mean. I am also a stay home mom and sometimes asking for money bugs me. But I also know that I work my butt off in our home and I deserves to have a little cash in my pocket for myself. :) 

Serabeth06
by Bronze Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 12:35 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm a stay at home mom to a 3 year old and a 7 year old, with a baby on the way. I was working full time, getting my bachelor's degree, and my husband asked me to stay home while the kids are little. I think as long as your fiance is appreciative of the work you do at home, you have nothing to feel bad about. Enjoy that time with your little one and be there for your fiance. If you have a hard time asking him for money, maybe discuss getting a joint bank account with your fiance so that you can feel that it's "our" money instead of "his" money. I stay home, but I handle all of the finances for myself and my husband. He brings in the money, I put it all where it needs to go, and run the household, take care of the kids, et cetera.

MommyRush
by Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 12:51 PM
1 mom liked this
I'm a stay at home mom and my husband is the only one bringing in money. I'm the say exact way as you I make sure the kids are all well taken care of whatever it is. I cook clean laundry whatever around the house. the difference is I dont have to ask him foe money. We share a bank account and while I dibt contribute money me doing what I do for our family is my way of contributing. I pay the bills so I know what are finances are and if we have the money I wanna treat myself to something hubby has no problem with it. I never put us in financial strain because I saw a new pair of shoe I wanted. So if he is up for it maybe try having both you on the account so you don't have to ask for money like an allowance.
mommyflaw
by Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 1:09 PM
1 mom liked this

My husband works and I stay home with the kids and go to school. I feel guilty sometimes but I know my job is important as well. I don't ever ask for anything for myself as far as pampering goes haha.

MamaBear2cubs
by Nikki on Jul. 21, 2014 at 2:04 PM

I agree.

Quoting mama2b100808:

Oh hun! I know what you mean. I am also a stay home mom and sometimes asking for money bugs me. But I also know that I work my butt off in our home and I deserves to have a little cash in my pocket for myself. :) 


mama2b100808
by Mandy on Jul. 21, 2014 at 2:07 PM
1 mom liked this

:) Thanks! :) I like when you agree with what I say. :) 

Quoting MamaBear2cubs:

I agree.

Quoting mama2b100808:

Oh hun! I know what you mean. I am also a stay home mom and sometimes asking for money bugs me. But I also know that I work my butt off in our home and I deserves to have a little cash in my pocket for myself. :) 



cupcake_mom
by KT on Jul. 22, 2014 at 8:41 PM
Don't feel guilty. Do you know how much money you are saving by not having to pay child care? And by cooking meals at home? Do you know how important your job actually is to your family? If you feel bad about not making money maybe you could baby sit 1 other child for a single struggling parent and charge then like $100 a week. That's what I do. That extra $400 a month helps out. Can you get disability maybe?
JasonsMom2007
by on Jul. 22, 2014 at 8:46 PM
I don't feel bad about staying at home and not bringing in money. I used to work in preschools and I saw kids who were in daycare 12 hours a day. I don't want that for my kids and neither does hubby. There are things more important than money.
I homeschool our kids too.
RheaF
by Silver Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 7:40 AM
2 moms liked this

 I have been a SAHM since our first was born, almost 9 years ago. It is what DH and I agreed was best. Yes, technically he brings home the money, however neither of us has ever viewed it as just "his" money. It is "ours". He knows how hard I work inside the home, and considers that my contribution.  I do not feel guilty for treating myself once in a while and have never had to ask for money. I have full access to our accounts. DH works hard so that I can be the SAHM and have this time with our kids and do all that I do, he also believes I deserve a break every now and then.

Your SO has told you he doesn't mind. He prboably knows how hard you work and honestly is ok with you treating yourself. Don't feel guilty!

ketket27
by New Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 1:14 PM
I was raised by a stay at home mom and became one myself. Being a stay at home mom is a full time job that can very nerve racking at times and the best feeling at other times. I know it's not what a lot of people think a woman should do but it's whatever makes you happy. But in the end it is hard work. And what one of the other moms said about a joint bank account making you feel less guilt about the money is true.
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