Intuitive Eating MommiesIntuitive Eating Mommies / General Discussion

Keep up with discussion in the "Intuitive Eating Mommies" group through your e-mail, or join in the conversation yourself!

Join CafeMom Today (It's free and easy!) Already a member?

what to do when you just can't stop

trixie212

posted to General Discussion in Intuitive Eating Mommies
on Jul. 10, 2008 at 4:43 PM

  • 6 Replies
  • 340 Total Views
More times than not I find myself on "auto-pilot". I'm not the least
> bit hungry, but there I am, in the kitchen, rummaging through the
> cupboards and fridge and stuffing what I can into my face. Half of
> the time, I don't even taste the food. I'm certain that years of
> dieting and obsessing about calories has done this to me, and I do
> good in the morning and early afternoon waiting until I'm hungry to
> eat. But after that, forget it. I also have a really hard time
> telling when I'm satisfied. I just get this overwhelming need to have
> something in my mouth, and I'm completely out of control. Has anyone
> had any success on what to do to fight these binges?
>
Written by on Jul. 10, 2008 at 4:43 PM

Replies:


  • Liveinazoo
  • by on Jul. 18, 2008 at 11:04 PM
  • I'm new to this, and I haven't read the book, so I'm sort of winging it.  When this happens to me, I'm trying to do a couple of things:

    1. a mantra... nothing "new agey" or anything.  I'm used to telling myself, "I deserve to eat this" or "This won't count."  Now I'm trying to tell myself "I deserve better than to treat my body like this" or "I can come back and eat this when I'm hungry."  Sometimes it works.

    2. distraction... like getting on-line and finding this site, or taking a shower, picking up a book, or checking something off my "to do" list.  But not  watching TV, because I often eat while I watch.

    3. labeling... trying to give a name to what I'm actually feeling.  Am I bored or stressed or sad?  I know it's sort of a cheesy saying, but one of the women in the weight-watchers meeting I used to go to said, "If hunger isn't the problem, then eating isn't the answer." 

    4. stop by saying it out loud... "This is going to be my last chip."  I don't know why, but sometimes, if I say it out loud, it helps and I can put the bag away.

    Hope this helps.  Let me know if you come up with some strategies to help with this problem because it's definitely an issue I have as well!

    -Mary

  • anneb123
  • by on Jul. 21, 2008 at 12:20 PM
  • I'm new to this and am still working out the kinks, but what I've found helps is taking a few deep breaths, closing my eyes, and conciously tuning back in to my body.  Once I feel my fullness - or sometimes nausea, to be honest - I can usually make the decision to put the food away and walk away.  But most importantly, no beating myself up.  Berating myself only strengthens the message that I'm not worth treating myself well and sets me up for future binges.  Take it in stride and be gentle with yourself.  If a friend came to you telling you that she did this, you would empathize and offer support.  Why should you treat yourself any differently?  You're just as worthy of feeling good and being treated well.  Sending some supportive vibes your way...
  • Sourkeys
  • by on Mar. 9, 2009 at 10:43 PM
  • What really helped me (as I was a Bulemic and ate everything in site when on a binge) was when I started to feel that need to eat , you know that mind-numbing obsessive thought that I have to start eating anything NOW....) was to BREAK that need to eat connection. Yell STOP! Then I would go and do something that took me away from the food. My thing was to take a calming bath. It didn't matter what time of the day, just take the bath and let those feelings go down the drain. You could try something else that would work for you? The more you try to break the cycle, the easier the next and the next time will be. You'll feel back in control again.

    If I can do it...so can YOU! Don't give up.

    K

     

     

  • Angela_P71
  • by on Mar. 10, 2009 at 10:34 AM
  • Well, it has been a long time in coming, but I am getting better about staying conscious when it happens. Because for me, it's not an entire box or bag or whatever. It's a nibble of this, a bite of that, my mind tells me "just one little taste, and I'll be satisfied." But then it wants one little taste of another thing and another.

    I am starting to remember some of the new skills that I've been learning. One of them is the realization that if I'm not hungry, the food is never going to feel really satisfying. So I can challenge the idea that I'll be sastisfied with the "one little taste." No, I won't be satisfied, because I'm not hungry. I'll be dissatisfied and want to keep trying with something else. If hunger is not the problem, food is not the solution. It's ok to try something else, but let's try something else that's an activity, not a food.

    Another one that helps is the "Four Really's" test. Do I really, really, REALLY, REALLY want that <food item>? If it passes the 4R's test, I can have it but deserve to pay attention & savor it. Usually it doesn't pass the test.

    Best of all I think is when I realize it's happening, I can recognize it as an opportunity to find out what's going on inside me. Oh hey, I'm having that food craving thing. This is my chance to find out what's driving it so that I can actually address the underlying problem. To be honest, I haven't gotten any actual solutions from this yet. I take a moment to sit with the feelings. I let the edgy, anxious feelings surface, confront them calmly, try to understand what might be causing them. I haven't discovered any definitive root cause, but when I do that, the feelings dissipate. So at least it solves the immediate problem.

    I do have a tendency to try to do too many things at once, and I can easily make myself frantic. Sometimes it's a call from inside telling me that I need to take a break & calm down. It's just hard to learn that I don't need to take food with me into my calm down break time. 

    Anyhoo, thanks for listening, all.


    - A.P.


  • telltalemikey
  • by on Mar. 12, 2009 at 2:24 PM
  • i have been keeping myself busy with things that i enjoy. things that keep my hands and mind occupied. a lot of art projects. online surfing. since the weather has gotten a little nicer- i like to take my son for walks. we both get exercise and fresh air and i'm not stuck thinking about the cupboards. i also try to keep myself from feeling deprived because i know that will result in a binge. when i first start craving something i will just have it and get it over with. or try making a healthier version of it. i make sure i am getting balanced meals and staying hydrated. i try to ask myself before i eat if i am really hungry or if it's an emotin that wants comforting. i have also tried 'riding the wave'. just sitting there and closing my eyes, breathing deeply and letting the urge to binge pass. make a list of things that work for you (trial and error) and refer to those things. the key is not just thinking about coping strategies but actually making the effort to try them.

  • Angela_P71
  • by on Apr. 17, 2009 at 6:45 AM
  • I am working through a new Intuitive Eating program (the Am I Hungry one), and I found a couple of ideas there that have helped me when this happens.

    First of all, and I know I've heard this a million times, but it may finally be sinking in. When I want to eat but I'm not hungry, my little voice tells me that I'll be satisfied with "just a little" (one little chocolate, one or two chips, whatever). But I am learning to challenge that voice. I will NOT get a feeling of satisfaction from eating something if I am not hungry to start with. That "aaahh" feeling will elude me, and I'll one "just one little" something else. And something else again. So, sometimes it helps just to remind myself that the urge for "just a little" is the first step on a path that I've been down before, and it doesn't lead where I want to go.

    The other idea that I've found really helpful is this. When we have an urge to eat when we're not hungry, we have three choices:

    1) Eat.
    2) Distract ourselves.
    3) Address the source.

    It's important not to beat ourselves up psychologically when we choose option 1. Whatever problems we have faced in our lives, we learned these coping mechanisms because we were trying to make ourselves feel better. The point is that we've come to realize that it's not making us feel better, so we're trying to learn to make new choices.

    Option 2 may be really good if we choose instead to take a walk, call a friend, etc. In choosing Option 2, we may even stumble upon #3, if for example the urge to eat was from loneliness or boredom, etc.

    When I get the urge to eat & am not hungry, I've been trying to view it not as a "bad" feeling that I have to avoid but instead as an opportunity to figure out what's going on with me. Unfortunately, it tends to hit when I am in the middle of having to get a lot of things done, so I really don't feel that I can drop everything to sort out my mental state. But then, maybe that is the key. I'm feeling stressed and overwhelmed, and my body is telling me that I need to take a breather.


Only CafeMom members can reply to this post.

Join Group


Around CafeMom

Advertisement

© 2009 CMI Marketing, Inc. All rights reserved.