It has been a while. I have had computer problems, going to school, kids, sick and then started getting depressed. This week i went to a Christmas party for Women of Today group i just resently joined. It was really good. I have lived here going on 4 years in a small town. I am a shy person who at times have panick attacks being around people. Anyways i am meeting moms and people from church and it started out with me wanting to help out in the comunity. I feel hopefull again. My mother die 5 years ago and it is hard now my sister decided not to have Christmas this year and well it hit me hard. i am 40 years old and live far from my family. 5-6 hours away. Even though i am 40 i am the youngest in my family. So i feel a lot younger than i am. So with all that i have said and my jumping around i am trying to find my place in life. My place that is not what my family want of me but what i want for myself. I go to Lutheran church down the street and help in the community and a group of women who help each other to loose weaght and has asked me to join there group. They know how hard it is to struggle by any ones self in loosing weaght. I have once thought God had left me that i was not worth for good things to happen but in my struggles threw the years and the last 6 months to the extreem, I have 5 beautiful children what more can i ask for? He has always given me what i need in life. My family and new friends and soon i hope will be working as a LPN nurse that i thought i could never pass school you know a dream to help people is comming true. Soon i will be a nurse. This is the life God has meant for me. My oldest son does not talk much to me he is always mad at me for my past mistakes he has a child on the way. He can be mad i may not see my grandchild much but i am here praying every step of the way for God to watch over them. I am hoping that i can learn more about the bible and what it is to be Lutheran.
Love you all and may God watch over all of you!!!