Just curious

[mama24]

I was wondering ladies...why did you leave the donor....?

[GotTwins206]

My (ex-boyfriend) donor was abusive.  When I became prego with my twins, he turned on me, and began to beat on me, he wouldn't come home at night, he was cheating on me, and spend all my money.  Because I was having twins, my pregnancy was really fragile, so I didn't fight with him, or leave, I didn't want to be stressed out.  His behavior caused me to go into the hospital at 31 weeks with preterm labor.  I didn't have my twins for another 3 weeks, but even after the hospital stay he continued to hit on me.  So I waited until my twins were born, and the next time he put his hands on me, I put him in jail for five months, he receive a felony conviction, and a five year no-contact order, which I abide by.  So I have been taking care of our 9 month old twins, for the last 8 months ALONE.

[mama24]

wow, kudos to you for being strong enough to leave. it took me 9 yrs and 3 kids to leave. mine was abusive as well and my kids were getting older and were witnessing the fights,it was bad. I was so scared that my kids would repeat our mistakes. he also abused drugs and was completely self absorbed, he took money often to buy drugs even when we couldn't afford it and also he was not secretive about smoking pot in fron of the kids...they used to call it the stinky stuff. The night I finally left, he dragged me around the house by my hair and I had it, I couldn't do it anymore, my kids were screaming and something inside of me just came to life. I wanted a better life for all of us, and despite all of thsi my kids remain faithful to their dad evn though hes a loser

Quoting GotTwins206:

My (ex-boyfriend) donor was abusive.  When I became prego with my twins, he turned on me, and began to beat on me, he wouldn't come home at night, he was cheating on me, and spend all my money.  Because I was having twins, my pregnancy was really fragile, so I didn't fight with him, or leave, I didn't want to be stressed out.  His behavior caused me to go into the hospitial at 31 weeks with preterm labor.  I didn't have my twins for another 3 weeks, but even after the hostiptial stay he continued to hit on me.  So I waited until my twins were born, and the next time he put his hands on me, I put him in jail for five months, he receive a felony conviction, and a five year no-contact order, which I abid by.  So I have been taking care of our 9 month old twins, for the last 8 months ALONE.

[Poetmom]

I have two former husbands (the only term I use to describe either of them...no ex, no donor, etc.). I left the first one, with whom I have two children, because he was lazy, basically....he wanted a mom, not a wife, and with two small children, one of them high needs, I needed a partner, not another child. I left the second one, with whom I have one child, because of physical and verbal abuse to me, and verbal abuse to the children.

[Kelli_and_Riley]

I left my ex when I was 7 months pregnant. It was the toughest and smartest thing I ever did. He had been back from his deployment (he's in the navy) for less than a month. He had been cheating on me, lying to me, and just being a jackhole. He harassed me through my pregnancy, even had the nerve to come to the hospital when he found out from his mother (who I maintained a relationship with up until recently) that I was having the baby. Now, he is making my life difficult by refusing to pay child support and saying the child isn't his - whatever. Karma will eventually catch up to him!

[mama24]

Quoting Kelli_and_Riley:

I left my ex when I was 7 months pregnant. It was the toughest and smartest thing I ever did. He had been back from his deployment (he's in the navy) for less than a month. He had been cheating on me, lying to me, and just being a jackhole. He harassed me through my pregnancy, even had the nerve to come to the hospital when he found out from his mother (who I maintained a relationship with up until recently) that I was having the baby. Now, he is making my life difficult by refusing to pay child support and saying the child isn't his - whatever. Karma will eventually catch up to him!

I also believe that leaving my ex was the toughest and yet smartest thing I ever did. Are you going to do a paternity test??? I hate that men will put all that energy into denial when I think personally it would be easier and more fulfilling to just be a dad.

[mommyof3angels]

I have 2 ex's, one ex-husband & one ex-boyfriend, they were both abusive to me.  When me and my ex-husband spilt up it was hard at first (I had a 2 year old & an almost 2 month) but then it got easier.  Then I met my youngest daughter's dad, and he was 10 worse than my ex-husband (its the truth really).  I lost everything because of him and I realize know he never cared about me or the kids (we haven't been together since June 06). He has hit, me tried to kill me (with my kids being there), left bruises on me, I get headaches all the time from where he hit me in the head.  He always said if I ever took our daughter away from him he would kill me and right now i have a protective order against him and also he is only allowed supervised visits because of that and some other things.  He is a CONTROL FREAK!  He still does not want to get the hint things are over between us and it doesn't help any when I am court-ordered to supervise his visits with our daughter-it has its up and down sides to it.  At least I don't have to worry about him taking off with her or hurting her, but still it stinks.  I was working and going to school full-time, plus taking care of our daughter, who was really sick and still has problems.  I am alot happier now and found someone that REALLY does care about me and my girls!!  If anyone wants to chat about anything~please feel free to pc me.

[momx7]

I left my ex for a number of reasons; he was a drug addict and alcoholic. He was not physically abusive, but he was very emotionally abusive. He wanted me to take him to the ER one night cause he was in SO much "pain" and when I said no, he grabbed my 1 year old and told me if I didn't take him, he was going to leave with him and not come back. He refused to work and when I tried to, he made it very difficult. He stole money from people to support his drug habit, then he started selling drugs. The thing that finally woke me up was when he went to get something to eat one night, he left at 6:00pm and never came home til noon the next day. I left, as I was leaving, he punched my van about 100 times, so my mom(who happened to be there)called the police; and when I got back he was in jail! (he had a warrant for unpaid court fines) After he got out, I let him come back, cause I felt sorry for him (Stupid me). My mom started getting messages on her answering machine saying that if I didn't leave him, I was going to lose my kids. They wouldn't say who they were, and I didn't care, that was it! I was not about to lose my kids over his lazy, drunken ass!

[ilovegarfield]

I left my ex on Sept 11, 2001! My ex was an alcoholic and was addicted to gambling. I was living the life of a single mother, so decided to go for it all the way witout the stress of having to deal with him ful-time. Not to mention, I was tired of us having to move over and over again, we couldn't pay rent because our bill money went to beer and poker machines. When 9-11 happened and I watched in horror all of those people dying, the heroes risking their life for strangers, I decided I could be as strong as these people and make a better life for me and my daughter. We have never been happier!!

[moms_rock]

Physical and verbal abuse.  He is also very irresponsible.

[mommymonkey]

I left because he tried to choke me, and kicked in the bathroom door when I manged to escape his grasp. I was holding my daughter at the time, and she was only 5 months old. No way was I going to put up with that.