Introduce yourself

[mama24]

Hello ladies and welcome. Why don't you take a minute to introduce yourself if you haven't already so we can all get to know a bit about you, tell us what brought you to this group.

[sssmom]

Hi my name is Terri and i live in Illinois. I am 36 and have 3 lovely girls (2 are from my first marriage with the deadbeat! the 3rd is with my new hubby who is wonderful!) we have been divorced since 96 and things were ok (better than now!) for about 9 years. when we got divorced he wanted the company his father left him without me having any control or input - so i gave it to him, i wanted sole custody of the girls so that there would be no fights about upbringing - so he gave it to me. my oldest was 3 and the youngest (my middle now) was not even 1. he barely saw the kids, but was pretty decent with child support. in 2002 we moved to the same town he lived in, i was trying to promote some type of closeness between him and the girls. he moved in 2003 just to the other side of town to a $500,000 house with his new wife and daughter - he had 2 sons after that. than in april of 04 he decided he no longer wanted to pay child support and disassembled his company (his new wife took over the clients and vendors and the employees - in other-words they closed his company and opened the same one under her name to hide his income from me and the irs who he owed a ton of $$ to) and tried to fight me for custody. it was HELL he ran me through the ringer, calling DHS and told them i was an unfit mom so he could get an emergency order of protection so i could not see my kids and started filling their heads with crap about me. i fought in court it took me over a month to be able to see my kids because dhs had to complete its investigation. we even had to go through a custody evaluation - his request - the report exposed him for the angry, self absorbed pig he is so he decided he no longer wanted to follow the advice of this professional that he chose! so i brought the report to the attention of the court and the kids came back home - they hated living with their dad, he was too hard on them and would not accept them for who they were. he was constantly trying to change them. but nothing was final. i tried several time to come to an agreement with this man who would never agree to anything i suggested, just because i suggested it. it got to the point that neither girl wanted to see him and every week he called the police accusing me of denying visitation, the police got really tired of him and realized the kids had valid reason for not going! the oldest eventually started going again but the youngest (middle) still to this day will not go visit her father and has not since may of 06. she tried to go over there to see her sister and brothers but he was negative to her and his wife was mean and tried to make her feel bad, so she did not want to go anymore. she sees them at community events - one in particular my oldest brought her brother over to see her and her dad came over with out word and grabbed his son and walked away, leaving her there with mouth agape. she now cant see them unless she does what he wants. he did not even want her there on Christmas and did not bother to call or send a gift or card-real nice huh?
trial was set for this feb, on the day trial began his lawyer brought in a proposal that my ex had approved, (my ex did not even bother to show) it gave me back the kids lowered his child support and the past due amount he had not paid plus taking away a lot of the money due from school/extra curricular activities, clothes and supplies, medical and RX's - we had always split these amounts, he has yet to pay any of it. and in turn i would retain sole custody of both girls and he had in there a visitation schedule that did not include our 2nd daughter, he no longer wanted anything to do with her because she would not give into him and lay down to die! i will never regret marring him as i love my daughters too much, i just wish for them that he was a real man.
WOW sorry that is just a "short" rundown of details if i told the whole story it would be a book!!
i think he should win the award of the century as dead beat king. but i am sure you all have gone through similar or worse things so maybe not king...

[mama24]

wow! yeah he sound pretty bad, mine comes and dissapears all the time, I wish he would just diaappear, how nice is that? Welcome to the group, I am sure you will make friends here

[Krinky]

Hi! I'm Kristina and the mother of 4. My oldest is 9 , i have a 9 yr old sd, my 3 yr old daughter and me and my hubby have a 2 yr old together. Well the deadbeat is the sperm donor for my 3 yr old Sheyenne. I say sperm donor because that was pretty much all he was. We broke up while i was pregnant with her. He never called to see how the pregnancy was doing or what not. And when she was born she had some problems and was sent to a hospital about 6 hours away. We live in a small town so i knew he heard the news but did he ever call - no. She came home when she was 2 months old. I called him to see if he wanted to see her. He was a part of her life for a few months untill she started coming back from her dad's place with diaper rashes and smelloing like cigarette smoke. I do smoke but not around her. I always took it outside and i told him that too. She had pnemonia when she was a infant twice and had to have a nebulizer. Well after that i told him if he wants to visit her it was at our home. Well he called once after that and that was it. I do run into him every so often and he never even asks about her. He asks how i am doing but nothing about her. But i never got paternity established with Sheyenne and i never got court ordered child support from him . My husband is pretty much her dad. He loves her like his own and she calls him daddy most of the time. I want him to give up his rights to her but since paternity has never been established and he is not on anything as being the father of her i don't think he has any rights to her. I guess it is better this way. She never really knew him so she's not missing him or even knows him. When she's the right age i will explain to her.

[butterflyj20]

Hi I am Jenny, a mother of 2 girls, my first daughter is from the previous marriage and I remarried and had my second daughter. I don't even want to waste my typing energy explaining what a bastard my ex-loser is. Maybe some other time when the non-child-support paying, never calls or sends his daughter crap, taking care of all his girlfriend's kids for the last 3 years scummy ass pisses me off again, which he undoubtedly will.

[butterflyj20]

Quoting butterflyj20:

Hi I am Jenny, a mother of 2 girls, my first daughter is from the previous marriage and I remarried and had my second daughter. I don't even want to waste my typing energy explaining what a bastard my ex-loser is. Maybe some other time when the non-child-support paying, never calls or sends his daughter crap, taking care of all his girlfriend's kids for the last 3 years scummy ass pisses me off again, which he undoubtedly will.

sorry about the language guys. i need a punching bag with his picture on it. better yet i would just like to beat the crap out of him, see here i go again. i'm done. lol

[mommyofcam]

Quoting butterflyj20:

Quoting butterflyj20:

Hi I am Jenny, a mother of 2 girls, my first daughter is from the previous marriage and I remarried and had my second daughter. I don't even want to waste my typing energy explaining what a bastard my ex-loser is. Maybe some other time when the non-child-support paying, never calls or sends his daughter crap, taking care of all his girlfriend's kids for the last 3 years scummy ass pisses me off again, which he undoubtedly will.

sorry about the language guys. i need a punching bag with his picture on it. better yet i would just like to beat the crap out of him, see here i go again. i'm done. lol

Oh girl.. no reason to be sorry.. I completely understand!!! Isn't that we are all here anyway???

[bubbles1984]

Hi! my name is Becca and I have 2 kids. A 3 yr old and an 18 mth old. They are really trying at times but for the most part really quite lovely. My ex was awesome through my first pregnancy. He was there when I needed him and an awesome father. Then her first birthday came and I guess he had enough. The last time we had sex I got pregnant with our son! Ironic isn't it! Then he disappeared. He would say he would be there and that he wanted to be there. Then he wouldn't show up! It made me so mad to see the hurt in my little girls face when she couldn't see her daddy. He has only seen our son twice and he has been in the hospital 5 times. By court order he is suppose to be paying me $45 a week total and isn't paying that! Now I am trying to get a job and have a court case against him. So, I have a pending court case on my record. Guess what? I am having a hard time getting a job. They want to hire me but can't right now! He has screwed up my life more than anyone else! I want to castrate him..... but that would be to good. Sorry, I needed to vent there. Thanks for listening!

[mama24]

I want to castrate him..... but that would be to good. Sorry, I needed to vent there. Thanks for listening!


ok I copied and pasted that because it was too good LOL. cruel but sooo good!! It may save some other woman trouble if it was done!! Sorry I am just kidding

[momx7]

Hi all! My name is Carie, I have 3 boys from my marriage to the deadbeat...1 with my new hubby and 3 step kids. I divorced the ex because he was a druggie. He is one to come and go as he pleases, calls when it's convenient. He did pay child support, until he found out his girlfriend is pregnant. I hate the SOB and if it weren't for my kids actually wanting to see him, I would tell him to piss off and don't ever come back! I actually did tell him that in a sense...I told him he has til next week to be a dad like he is supposed to be (every other weekend), or that's it. DOn't bother to call, or try to see them. I get so sick of seeing their dissapointed little faces every time he doesn't show up!! He is SUCH a jerk! (Boy, that is just too nice of a word for him, but I don't want to offend anyone). My 16 year old has nothing to do with him. I hope that eventually the 10 yr. old and 7 yr. old get the idea and tell him C_YA! That's about it for now.

[mama24]

Quoting momx7:

Hi all! My name is Carie, I have 3 boys from my marriage to the deadbeat...1 with my new hubby and 3 step kids. I divorced the ex because he was a druggie. He is one to come and go as he pleases, calls when it's convenient. He did pay child support, until he found out his girlfriend is pregnant. I hate the SOB and if it weren't for my kids actually wanting to see him, I would tell him to piss off and don't ever come back! I actually did tell him that in a sense...I told him he has til next week to be a dad like he is supposed to be (every other weekend), or that's it. DOn't bother to call, or try to see them. I get so sick of seeing their dissapointed little faces every time he doesn't show up!! He is SUCH a jerk! (Boy, that is just too nice of a word for him, but I don't want to offend anyone). My 16 year old has nothing to do with him. I hope that eventually the 10 yr. old and 7 yr. old get the idea and tell him C_YA! That's about it for now.

they probably will say C'ya. My 10 yr. old has no faith in her dad, and a few times out of anger has said that she hates him. She doesn't hold her breath where he is concerned. I know that my son is more faithful than the girls and still holds onto the ideal that his dad may change. I know I for one would not be offended if you used a stronger word than jerk. Welcome to the group