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how can you miss dad, when you dont know him

Posted by on Jul. 31, 2007 at 2:12 AM
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how do you explain to a three year old that your dad is a loser? i dont understand, he constantly asks for his dad and says he misses him, but he is never around and they really dont have much of a bond, i dont know how to handle it, a part of me wants to just cut off all ties, but the other part does not want to be the bad guy here and get blamed later. i just dont get it. how can you miss someone you dont even Know????????

by on Jul. 31, 2007 at 2:12 AM
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Replies (1-5):
JeJaNi_MaMa
by Member on Jul. 31, 2007 at 2:20 AM

I hear ya.  That IS the hardest part.  My boys have gotten to the point where they don't even ask about heir father & don't want to tlk to him when he calls them.  I try to be as honest as I can w/ them & just let them know that even though their dad isn't here that I always will be.  If you ever want to chat about things, feel free.  Good luck.

MikisMommy
by on Jul. 31, 2007 at 2:23 AM
was your ex ever a part of Dameon's life?? if so how often do they see eachother?

-Mari, Mommy of Mikaela Eve

MsYvi
by New Member on Jul. 31, 2007 at 2:44 AM
wow...I can already see that happening to me.  My daughter is 3 months old and I know it will be a while before she starts asking me about her deadbeat father.  He never even showed up at the hospital when I gave birth and to sign his name on her birth certificate.  I'm scared to tell her the truth, but I also don't want to cover up for him.  I wish I can give you some good advices on this, but I am also venting just like you.  It's a shame because your son is so adorable and most importantly innocent.  He doesn't deserve to be hurt.  Take care!
montanasmama731
by Member on Jul. 31, 2007 at 7:58 AM
Just tell them he is working or something like that.  He will know the truth.  We saw my sons father the other day at the store and when we left, my son looked at me and said "Mommy, I only want Bobby to be my daddy".  Bobby is my husband.  My son will tell you flat out that his daddy dont care about him.  That was an opinion he picked up on his own.  Kids will know the truth, there is no sense in telling them when they are this young.  Nothing is harder then having your child ask about someone you know doesnt care and not knowing what to say.  Jess

Lilypie Expecting a baby TickerLilypie 4th Birthday Ticker

PeaceofMind292
by Member on Jul. 31, 2007 at 8:11 AM
Kids will always be curious about their dad whether they know him or not.  Television, books, and society dictates to our children that there should be a mom and a dad in their lives.  However, sad but true many children are being raised and have very little to do with their biological fathers.  My children rarely ask to talk to their dad.  I don't lie to them, but I do withhold some truths because they are too young to see.  We actually pray for him each night and ask God to protect him, but other than that they rarely even reference him.  He's been physically out of their lives for  almost  10 months.  I don't say bad things about him to them, but as time passes I know that they will formulate their own opinions.  Don't forget...  your child will always have a fondness or curiosity for the man that helped create his life.
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