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people keep telling me to not get pregnant!

Posted by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:12 PM
  • 33 Replies

no one has a perfect marriage and yes my 2 kids can be a handful. People who love me keep saying maybe I shouldn't get pregnant and keep saying "why do you want another one?" or AND U WANT MORE? Is there something I don't know about my marriage that I should fix before getting pregnant? I have issues with my husband but we are committed to working them out. My life is a bit harder because DH is a pilot and gone a lot and I can't change that. At least he can provide for us. What am I  being blind too that people keep saying dont have more kids? I would NOT feel ok to voluntarily NOT have more children. I feel like there is one or 2 more that need to join our family. I feel like as long as I am willing to let this happen I am doing what I should even if these babies are not sent to me. If I stopped having kids I would forever wonder if I was wrong or what if there were more babies that needed to come to earth and be in my home. I know it's no ones business what I do, but seriously, is there something that I CAN fix with DH and I that I don't know about?! takes a lifetime to learn to live together easier. and I don't think It's ever EASY!

by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:12 PM
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Replies (1-10):
txcandy13
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:17 PM

You should have a baby if you want. Dont listen to what others think or say. i understand what you are going through, I hear the same thing,,then one of my sister n laws get pregnant ane everyone is so happy. Go for it, its your life its your family. no one else. they love you and they think they are lookinng out for you but they should be supporting your decision. I understand where you are coming from. Keep you chin up and yes, everyone has relationship prob just not everyone will admit it. everyone gets in arguments etc...Here if you need anyone to talk to.

kayteebug93
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:18 PM
Ugh that's annoying!!! Don't listen to them. If You and dh want more go for it. Good luck and try not to get down on yourself. Life isn't easy.. not at all.
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annies75
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:18 PM
I have 5 kids. 3 are mine and 2 are his. And I get people saying that all the time. Screw what people think. All I ever wanted was to be a mom. So I want more kids
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MandK
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:20 PM

 A wise woman once told me "Love is not just a feeling, it is a job." It is a job that takes commitment, reviews, attention to details, and hard work. No one can tell you how your marriage is but you and your husband. You are right though, it is not always Easy! I hope this may help you and i Wish You The VERY Best!

inkedfirecracke
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:20 PM
I'm the type of person that, yes, I'll listen to others have to say, but if I don't agree, I'll just nod my head and smile then walk away or let them know exactly how I feel about what they just said.

Maybe they're jealous because you ARE happy and a lot of people out there (most of the people who surround themselves around ME) don't like to see others happy.

Do what you want and don't let anyone tell you what not to do! I'm assuming you're over the age of 18. When you turned 18, you became the only person who can make your decisions.
Even if you're not 18, when you had your first kid, you technically became emancipated! :o)
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gr8momto4
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:36 PM

I am experiencing the same thing! I receive the EXACT comments of "are you sure you want another one" "do you want another one now" "still want that baby" I have 4 kids and yes they are a handful at times but nothing I can't handle. I will post a video of my 2 year old throwing a fit on my FB page and I get so many comments stating "are you sure you want more"...it is really starting to get aggravating. I feel for you! I have been able to let the comments roll off my shoulder so far, but it's getting harder. Today I was trying to think of a clever way to respond but I came up with nothin lol GOOD LUCK TO YOU

CakeMaker84
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:36 PM

Your family. Your home. Your life. Your experiences. My sister keeps telling me that I need to wait to TTC #2 because a) she doesn't like my hubby and b) because "it's too hard" to have them close together. But her experience having her kids less than 2 years apart is going to be different because I'm MARRIED and not 14. (yeah...)(I also know how hard it can be with hubby away alot, mine is in the Navy) So just keep in mind that people experience and handle things differently. If you and your hubby want more kids, go for it! Good luck!

mylady13135
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:43 PM

I get the same things.....My hubby and I have A LOT of problems in our lives....but HE came to me and we discussed wanting another...this will be his 4th and my 3rd...and we do not plan on telling anyone until AFTER I am pregnant and then they cant talk us out of anything because it is already done!! It is your decision and if you want to have 15 more kids then you should do it!! GL to you!!

newmamanew2town
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 10:47 PM

I am so glad you posted this...as I am sure there are a lot of us that get this crap from people.

It's partly due to our society and respect for "family" that is talking here... what the hell happened to "be fruitful and multiply"  way back when families were tighter... having like 5 or more kids was the norm...I am sure it wasn't easy!

I have two kids and I am proud to be ttc a 3rd...and even a 4th one day...my step mil...makes these comments ...when she sees me "disciplining my squirrly almost 4 year old...sure I get frustrated who would...and she saw me once and said "HUH,,Are you SURE you want more?"... Later that same day...that same squirrly almost 4 year old came running up to proudly had me a flower (ahem weed he got  outside...) but to him it was a flower and he was so pround to give it to me and gave me a hug and told me he loved me... and I didn't miss a beat looking up at her and saying... who couldn't want more of these?!!!

J.Norman
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 11:08 PM
I just had a m/c at 12w4d with my 4th baby and df 1st and i have had people..... mainly my aunt that doesnt know anything about my life telling me we dont need a baby. I literally just had a d&c last wednesday and shes saying this. Also shes told me I'm to fat to have another. anyways screw what other people think. I think they are jealous honestly that they cant have a big family or whatever. GOOD LUCK and have all the babies that you and your dh want to have!
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