Today I woke up feeling good, and excited because of the thought of ttc again and our family etc.
Then my dh and I started horsing around (not sexually) he grabbed my camera and started taking pictures of me (I'm a photographer of newborns, so I never take photos of myself) and I knew I was overweight being 5'6 and weighing 224-225 and just never thought I looked all that bad until I saw the photos he took, and I intantly got disgusted with myself and how AWFUL I look. I started crying and just am so annoyed that after having my son I can't lose the weight. I have thyroid problems, blood clotting issues, and a blood disorder so losing weight has been rough and when I was in highschool I had a eating disorder and NEVER wanted to be this big, and here I am stuck in the middle of it, and I feel like i'm drowning. I'm so discouraged :(