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TTC - Trying to Conceive TTC - Trying to Conceive

Can't believe she said that!

Posted by on Aug. 7, 2012 at 6:21 PM
  • 10 Replies

Quick background- I've been TTC #1 for 5 years now and I have had one m/c. I am currently in the middle of my first IVF cycle.

So today I was having my weekly phone chat with my sister. Somehow the topic of religion got brought up and I mentioned to her that lately that is something that I have been really struggling with. I couldn't believe what she responded with1 She basically said that maybe my lack of belief could be why I am not getting pregnant. I told her if I was standing next to her that I would have had to smack her for saying that to me! I'm not proud of admitting that I have been struggling with my faith lately but I am sure I am not the only infertile person who has had the same problem. That is just one of the many things you don't say to someone having trouble ttc! By the end of the conversation she felt terrible and apologized for even saying that but I still can't seem to get that out of my mind. Just had to vent girls! Thanks for listening!

by on Aug. 7, 2012 at 6:21 PM
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Replies (1-10):
JessiFaye
by Silver Member on Aug. 7, 2012 at 6:24 PM

WOW. Just... wow. I've had people say things to me without thinking before, but nobody has ever said anything like that. I'm really sorry you're having to deal with this... even if she did apologize, it's not like that erases it from your memory. Nobody deserves to hear that or be judged like that, especially by your own sister.

feralkitten
by on Aug. 7, 2012 at 6:31 PM

lol oh i heard this about my pain to i have hypermobility syndrome and due to that i have very bad knee pain and i heard everything including if i had faith i get better pmsl

people don't think even if there family they cant understand how you feel until they been threw it and even then tbh they wont feel the same as you

GwenMB
by Gwen on Aug. 7, 2012 at 7:20 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm sorry - someone who is struggling with their faith shouldn't be judged like that.  You need support, not judgement!

Everyone goes through times where they struggle with their faith - I don't think anyone who says they don't is being honest.  I also don't think God really punishes someone for struggling - esp since, quite honestly, the person with the strongest faith still can't really measure up to God or Jesus.

Cynthia86
by Cynthia on Aug. 7, 2012 at 9:12 PM

Thanks for understanding ladies!

rainbowbabe220
by on Aug. 7, 2012 at 9:18 PM
1 mom liked this
Believing has nothing to do with having a baby... my cuz and I are both non believers and I have a 3 yo and she's pregnant with number 1...
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alonebutnot
by on Aug. 7, 2012 at 9:40 PM
I agree that's not right. Sorry your having a hard time and have to deal with that! Gl! Hugs!
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NoraDun
by Ruby Member on Aug. 7, 2012 at 10:10 PM

That definately wasn't the best response. I am sorry. Unfortunately part of our faith does mean some times trials and tribulations. And keeping that faith is important even through the hard times. The bible even shows us that often times the devils gives things freely to win over the souls of people, where as God ask us to work a little for it trusting and believing in him. This is why I struggle so greatly when people from all kinds of ungodly walks of life can get pregnant when I cant. Keep your faith sweetie, And I am so sorry your sister didnt support you in the way she should have. 

28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8-28

"We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance.  And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.  And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love." Romans 5:3-5

Jess21608
by Bronze Member on Aug. 7, 2012 at 10:14 PM

AMEN! I still struggle with it at times and Im finally pregnant after IUI..your definately not alone keep your chin up!

WenStew
by on Aug. 7, 2012 at 10:17 PM
Well said :)

Quoting NoraDun:

That definately wasn't the best response. I am sorry. Unfortunately part of our faith does mean some times trials and tribulations. And keeping that faith is important even through the hard times. The bible even shows us that often times the devils gives things freely to win over the souls of people, where as God ask us to work a little for it trusting and believing in him. This is why I struggle so greatly when people from all kinds of ungodly walks of life can get pregnant when I cant. Keep your faith sweetie, And I am so sorry your sister didnt support you in the way she should have. 

28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8-28

"We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance.  And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.  And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love." Romans 5:3-5

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ProudMama1125
by Silver Member on Aug. 7, 2012 at 10:24 PM

 That was a very insensitive thing for your sister to say! God wants us to have babies... That's a reason why we are women. & some of us have to try harder to get those BFPs than others. GL! I hope that you are blessed with a bundle of joy soon.

baby dust

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