I have been with cafemom for over a year but I have just decided to move myself over to the long term TTC group!
A little about us: TTC for over 1 year now, married 2.5 years, I have PCOS, DH had childhood cancer and has 0/zero sperm count based on analysis, we live with DH's parents until he finds a job, DH's family is very insensitive to us and has no understanding of our life, DH's brother met, married a wife and had a baby within the past year, they are pregnant again and most of DH's cousins are currently pregnant, his nephew looks just like DH and like DH did as a baby
We are seeing a reproductive endocrinologist and just had an appointment with urologist for DH. The urologist ordered blood work and ultrasound of testicles. Has anyone else had DH have this done? Also, he suggests doing a testicular biopsy which is invasive but he said the side effects are minimal. Has anyone else done this? The urologist also said if there is any sperm we will have to do IVF, and with that it's a 30% chance of conceiving. My DH reminds me as a child he only had 10% chance to live!
Has anyone done IVF? What are all the steps for it? Is it realistic to do that while working full time? I am concerned about the price and insurance. I know I can call and find out and I'm sure they will not pay all of it. What if they don't want to pay but the urologist is able to get sperm for IVF!? I am also concerned that my reproductive endocrinologist will not do IVF on me because she has done extensive blood work on me, all is normal except testosterone level and I am overweight. She said even if I was pregnant it would be "high risk" but I know other women who have healthy pregnancies my size. Has anyone had a problem with the doctors doing IVF and being overweight?
SO that's all the technical part lol but the emotional part is even more difficult, wouldn't you agree? Yesterday there was a birthday party for my father in law and DH and I were there along with lots of family gushing over our nephew. Everyone saying how wonderful it is they are having another child, how our nephew looks like DH, how he will have cousins to play with, how wonderful it is to have babies! Now I'm not saying you can't have kids, or we hate him, or anything like that but please don't rub it in our face! It was literally painful to be around DH's family, when we got home the both of us just cried and cried. I think the hardest part is I want to grieve, I want to get over the fact that our lives are not easy and this is now how I thought it would be. But then there's a tiny seed of hope in me I'm holding on to, a miracle I'm hoping for. There was another family event today but we could not bear to go. Since we live with DH's parents we had to tell my mother in law we were not going, she just does not understand and thinks we are just being rude or anti social. I wish she could feel the pain we feel then maybe she would think before judging us!
Well that's my life right now. Thanks to anyone who responds!