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TTC - Trying to Conceive TTC - Trying to Conceive

My little secret***Update***

Posted by on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:15 PM
  • 62 Replies

I'm gonna share my little secret with you lovely ladies & I want your opinions on it please. Me & DH just lost our second baby in Oct. (#1 is 2 yrs old). When I found out I was pregnant with this last one I told him I didn't want to tell anyone but he insisted on telling his parents and sister and of course they went announcing it to the damn world. And of course when I miscarried then no one wanted to anounce that did they? So I had to re-live the whole thing everytime someone asked. Ugh. So I told him for sure this time he has to promise when we get pregnant again we are not telling NO ONE! I want to wait until I am atleast 20 weeks for the next one (after we find out the sex). But of course I will be sharing my news with you ladies :)  Would you ever keep a secret like this? Am I being too sensitive? I just hated how they went against my wishes about only them knowing (DH idea) & still went and told everyone else even on FB!! But then I had to answer everyones dreaded questions to what was going on. Ugh.


***********************UPDATE****************************

I am so overwhelmed with all the responses I have gotten. I thought some might think I was being crazy hiding such a wonderful moment in a womens life but can turn into the most heart breaking in the blink of an eye. I want to thank all you ladies for your support. :) Thank you to all who gave me condolences & I'm sorry to all you ladies whom have lost a child(s) and wish you the best in your healing. And I want to wish all you ladies whom are pregnant a H&H 9 months (or however much you have left) & to those like me waiting (TTC) much luck & baby dust. Hoping to hear lots of BFP's through this year. Let's make this our year ladies!! :)

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by on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:15 PM
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Replies (1-10):
RMK510
by on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:21 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss. My dh and I will be waiting a little longer this time to tell . We have two sons and would like to be out of the first trimester before telling them. Our first two we told everyone immediatly. I totally understand why u would want to wait.
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NoraDun
by Ruby Member on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:24 PM

I am sorry for you loss. I think anyone who has gone through a loss feels that sence of protecting themselves and their family from further loss. We told everyone this pregnancy but I am so scared about losing it and having to share the news. I would definately wait. Although I think it would be hard to wait until 20 wks. I think by 12 I would be spilling the beans HAHA

Jrsmommy614
by Chrissy on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:25 PM

Thanks :) Our son is only 2 so he never truly understood what was going on about why mommy is at the doctors n such. So thank god for that. But my SIL was quick to tell the world including her kids but forgot to mention to them what had happened. So when her kids came over they were asking if I knew what I was having (her 7 yr old) and I had to explain to him that the baby decided it wasn't the time yet. And he just looked at me and said "it died?" Made me feel like total crap but just said "yes"

Quoting RMK510:

I'm so sorry for your loss. My dh and I will be waiting a little longer this time to tell . We have two sons and would like to be out of the first trimester before telling them. Our first two we told everyone immediatly. I totally understand why u would want to wait.


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Jrsmommy614
by Chrissy on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:27 PM

Haha I'm terrible at keeping secrets I ALWAYS get desperate but after what I went through with explanations I told think I could go through it again if it happened again. :(

Quoting NoraDun:

I am sorry for you loss. I think anyone who has gone through a lost feels that since of protecting themselves and their family from further loss. We told everyone this pregnancy but I am so scared about losing it and having to share the news. I would definately wait. Although I think it would be hard to wait until 20 wks. I think by 12 I would be spilling the beans HAHA


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ccoyle4
by Caitlin on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:28 PM
With my ds, I told everyone right away. With my first mc I did the same. Then with my second mc I only had told few select people. Soooo whenever I do get pg again, I'm only telling hubby and you all. I'd like to get out of the first trimester first.
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Jrsmommy614
by Chrissy on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:29 PM

Yup that will be my inner circle this time DH & you ladies :)  Sorry for your losses. :(

Quoting ccoyle4:

With my ds, I told everyone right away. With my first mc I did the same. Then with my second mc I only had told few select people. Soooo whenever I do get pg again, I'm only telling hubby and you all. I'd like to get out of the first trimester first.


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kygoodsell89
by on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:45 PM

my my first pregnancy, i was 16 pregnant with twins and EVERYONE knew.. i ended up losing them and it was really tramamtic telling everyone i lost them.  i was still in highschool and I heard rumors spread around that i got an abortion because it was twins and all kinds of crazyness. 

with my daughter, i told close people but didnt make a huge deal out of it...
my son i kept a secret from everyone until the car ride home from finding out he was a boy.

this next baby will be my husbands first and whatnot... since we already have a girl and a boy, i want it to be a surprise. and i plan on keeping my pregnancy a secret for as long as possible! 

LilysMommy813
by Heather on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:50 PM
I lost two babies last year, so I totally understand. I would never make it as far as 20 weeks, I tend to show early, but I have thought the same if I get pregnant again. I want to keep it between DH and I as long as I can. My dd is 5 and she had a hard time when we buried Lucy last year. I'm sorry for your loss and you do whatever feels right. Good luck :)
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Wantn1more
by Bronze Member on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:50 PM
We had 4 losses before conceiving our rainbow baby last year. We waited till after the first trimester screen to tell anyone... Like 13 weeks. I couldn't stand to relive another loss.
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Jrsmommy614
by Chrissy on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:51 PM

Omg how rude of people! I'm so sorry for your losses , high schoolers are just so damn immature! As some people I still know..smh. lol That's what I want to do announce after they done the ultrasound to check all organs n such & sex. So I can say whatever we picked out for He/she is arriving! :) But I originally want to keep it quiet as long as possible til I had no choice but I do want to be the one to announce it and not they found out cuz I was just huge so I'm hoping not to get too huge before then. :)

Quoting kygoodsell89:

my my first pregnancy, i was 16 pregnant with twins and EVERYONE knew.. i ended up losing them and it was really tramamtic telling everyone i lost them.  i was still in highschool and I heard rumors spread around that i got an abortion because it was twins and all kinds of crazyness. 

with my daughter, i told close people but didnt make a huge deal out of it...
my son i kept a secret from everyone until the car ride home from finding out he was a boy.

this next baby will be my husbands first and whatnot... since we already have a girl and a boy, i want it to be a surprise. and i plan on keeping my pregnancy a secret for as long as possible! 


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Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers


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