Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

TTC - Trying to Conceive TTC - Trying to Conceive

Would you use a donor egg? Update 5/12 Thx for all your replies.:)

Posted by on May. 10, 2013 at 3:20 PM
  • 97 Replies

As many of you know I am facing the choice of IVF.

The success rate for me using IVF and my own eggs is 28%.

50% with a frozen cycle and these numbers go down each month I age.

If I used donor eggs it would be a whooping success rate of 96%!!!

DH and I have discussed the donor egg option only briefly both of agreeing that we want the baby to be both of us.

The more I think about it tho the more I wonder if we should reconsider.

We really only can afford one shot at IVF. Well, two... 1 fresh cycle and one frozen cycle.

The chances of MC and trisomy are much higher using my eggs. 

I can't help but think if we only have this one shot we should just be ok that the baby would only have DHs DNA.

If your odds were like mine. What would you do?

I know we have to make up our own minds. I'm just curious.


5/12 Thank you so much for all your wonderful replies. I have read them all and am so grateful for all the advice given. 

As of today we haven't made a decision. I mentioned to DH that I made this thread and his reply was "you need to stay off that darn internet." LOL (He said this light heatedly.) We only talked briefly but decided that we would talk more about it when needed. Still hoping for a natural BFP (AF is due today tho) or a BFP next cycle when we do another IUI.

There have been some great points made here and some great advise and support. I appriciate it more than I can express. Thank you.

by on May. 10, 2013 at 3:20 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
LolaRenee
by on May. 10, 2013 at 3:44 PM
1 mom liked this

I would use the donor eggs. The disappointment of a failed cycle is immense. Knowing that its because of your eggs is even worse. I would be thankful that I am able to carry the child. I know so many women who cant even carry. Its sad. Anyway, use the donor eggs. I'm 33 with only one tube trying for #1 so I feel your pain. I've never gotten a BFP. Sometimes I think it will never happen.

ilovekeith12
by Sara on May. 10, 2013 at 3:45 PM
2 moms liked this
I don't know how I would feel about this .
I think I would have to have it be facing me to really say yes . But knowing my age then it's getting harder and harder ttc . Pray about it and if you both are ok with it then do it . I know my dh would say no . I don't even think he would be ok with any ivf for us and that scares me . Cuz I'm 36 will be 37 I'm dec . He doesn't get that every month is going to make it harder and harder
Melissa1222
by on May. 10, 2013 at 3:47 PM
2 moms liked this
You ultimate goal is to be a parent....would you consider adoption??? If you would then to me there is not a difference
x_Starr_x
by on May. 10, 2013 at 3:49 PM
2 moms liked this
Theres always a option of using a donor egg but having the dna removed and yours inserted
destiny2nv
by on May. 10, 2013 at 3:50 PM
2 moms liked this
I would use donor eggs. The ultimate goal is a healthyppregnancy that produces a healthy baby. It will be your baby no matter what :) you would still carry it. .
yroder2003
by Bronze Member on May. 10, 2013 at 3:50 PM
1 mom liked this
I say go for it. You guys want a baby, your dna or not, the baby will be yours. You will still be carrying the baby, it will still be growing inside of you. Talk some more with your hubby, but the baby will have a part of him at least.
Latvia
by Silver Member on May. 10, 2013 at 3:50 PM
1 mom liked this

since i'm not in your situation it's hard to say for sure, but i THINK i would go with donor egg. If i carried that baby, felt his/hers little kicks in my belly, gave birth to it... it's MY baby 100%! that's why i could never be surrogate, LOL

Skys_Mommy02
by Shannon on May. 10, 2013 at 3:51 PM
1 mom liked this

I would use donor eggs.. It will still be yours.. You will still be able to bond with him/her in the womb.. I think if you don't and you have failed cycles with your eggs you will always wonder and blame yourself.. Its a big decision though

ChefFatCat
by Silver Member on May. 10, 2013 at 3:53 PM
May I ask this???

Why is it your chances are droping bc of your eggs???

we are around the same age... im sorry Im not trying to be a.popper here but I guess Im Curious as to why
nikkihight
by Nikki on May. 10, 2013 at 3:56 PM
1 mom liked this

I wouldn't use donor eggs. I see where you are coming from but for me I want all or nothing.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN