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I just don't know... ???

Posted by on Jun. 2, 2014 at 3:47 PM
  • 10 Replies

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I was married to my now ex-hub for 5 1/2 years. Our youngest is now 3 1/2 years - born 10/13/10. We started trying again for another when he was 3 months old. I didn't get pregnant until late October/early November 2011, at just 7 weeks I went to the ER in extreme pain and with lots of bleeding to be told I had a miscarriage - 01/08/12. By March I had fully given up.

September 7th, 2013. I left him. He flat out said he didn't love me, didn't want to be with me anymore- things had gotten bad between us and I saw this coming. So I packed my stuff and left with my son.
Literally only 6 days later, I had met an amazing guy. We hung out, talked, had sec a couple times, and it turned into an amazing relationship. This April we got our first place together. It's now almost a year together and we're talking about trying for a baby. And I actually have a doctors appt tomorrow to see my ob/gyn.
I have asked him (after many long talks about what happened with my ex) if he wants me to ask the doctor if there's anything she can do to help is along in this process of is starting a family together. (He also has a son from a previous relationship). He said yes, but secretly, as badly as I want to be pregnant and have a family with him, I am scared shitless. I don't want to get my hopes up, only to have another miscarriage.

How would you feel? What do you think I should ask my doctor? And what personally should I look up and research about to ask her if I could try?
-please don't bash me, we know what we want. We are financially stable, have a house, he works, we have a vehicle. And mainly, we're responsible.
THANKS LADIES!! :) & GL to all of you!

***this pic is of me & bf now- Memorial Day!***
by on Jun. 2, 2014 at 3:47 PM
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Replies (1-10):
hypnautica
by Jennifer on Jun. 2, 2014 at 8:04 PM
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Unless you have been ttc a whole year with him, most docs will not do anything. Once you hit the year mark, then go in and ask for your hormones to be checked and a HSG to make sure your tubes are still open and he will also need a semen analysis. Even though you had a miscarriage in the past, she probably will not do anything yet. After the year mark and if the test comes out ok, then you can request to be put onto something like Clomid to see if that helps. Good luck and fx you get a bfp soon.

stcy79
by Silver Member on Jun. 2, 2014 at 8:20 PM

Dont let ur last relationship get in the way of this one. Only u know if its been good and working the past year and if yes then dont hold back. Fear will get in the way of any good in ur life thats to come. If he's good to u and most importantly ur child and u to his I say go forward.

As far as being scared about another MC, well I understand that! I lost my angel last Jan and have been ttc since and I worry it will happen again but thats a risk I will take to get my rainbow. My dr said I still have a 40% chance of another MC b4 you can hear the baby on a doppler same as everyone else but I lost mine at 14wks and he said only 2% go through that. Did you get to know why you lost ur baby? Some get answers and can help prevent another one from happening. Sorry went crazy with my post..LOL

Our angel was born to heaven on 1/10/2014 at 14wks 3days.

Amanda-xo-
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 11:26 AM
My doctor basically just said, keep trying, and suggested I buy ovulation tests. I showed her my FF charts and she asked about my periods. She said if within 2 years I still don't get pregnant to him, then she will look into something further, and it maybe my tubes. But right now, that's what she suggested.
And thank you, you too!!

Quoting hypnautica:

Unless you have been ttc a whole year with him, most docs will not do anything. Once you hit the year mark, then go in and ask for your hormones to be checked and a HSG to make sure your tubes are still open and he will also need a semen analysis. Even though you had a miscarriage in the past, she probably will not do anything yet. After the year mark and if the test comes out ok, then you can request to be put onto something like Clomid to see if that helps. Good luck and fx you get a bfp soon.

Amanda-xo-
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 11:29 AM
1 mom liked this
I know what you mean by that. The thought is more so in the back of my head, not so much a constant worry.
And no, I never did get an answer. Just pretty much, probably didn't implant right or there was maybe something wrong with the DNA/cromosones that it wasn't developing right. That's the best they could tell me.
-and "ranting" is sometimes ok, it releases stress in an ok manner. IMO anyways.

Quoting stcy79:

Dont let ur last relationship get in the way of this one. Only u know if its been good and working the past year and if yes then dont hold back. Fear will get in the way of any good in ur life thats to come. If he's good to u and most importantly ur child and u to his I say go forward.

As far as being scared about another MC, well I understand that! I lost my angel last Jan and have been ttc since and I worry it will happen again but thats a risk I will take to get my rainbow. My dr said I still have a 40% chance of another MC b4 you can hear the baby on a doppler same as everyone else but I lost mine at 14wks and he said only 2% go through that. Did you get to know why you lost ur baby? Some get answers and can help prevent another one from happening. Sorry went crazy with my post..LOL

tluvsd2
by TONI on Jun. 4, 2014 at 11:37 AM
1 mom liked this
IM HAPPY FOR U SWEETY THAT U HAVE A WONDERFUL MAN N YOUR LIFE I JUST WANT TO WISH U ALL THE BABY DUST AND GOOD LUCK! I HOPE U GET YOUR BFP SOON😊
Amanda-xo-
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 11:40 AM
Thank you!!

Quoting tluvsd2: IM HAPPY FOR U SWEETY THAT U HAVE A WONDERFUL MAN N YOUR LIFE I JUST WANT TO WISH U ALL THE BABY DUST AND GOOD LUCK! I HOPE U GET YOUR BFP SOON😊
hypnautica
by Jennifer on Jun. 4, 2014 at 1:22 PM
1 mom liked this

With dealing with infertility for 8yrs and no Im not a doc but please listen to my advice. If they arent willing to do anything at the year mark then either 1. find a new gyno or 2. see a reproductive endocrinologist. If you have an egg reserve issue, there is a chance you may only have months to get pregnant. That is my a hormone test is so very important. A friend of mine had her AMH tested and she was told hers was so low, IVF was her only option and she had about 6-12 months left before her time was up and she is only 28. Infertility isnt anything to play with and honestly a Gyno doesnt know where near as much as an RE does. I have been through 3 RE clinics and 3 IVFs, so I pretty much so know what I am talking about(no I dont know everything). 2yrs is ridiculous and I do not agree with it.

Amanda-xo-
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 7:11 PM
Me & my ex tried for 2 1/2 years
Me nd my current bf (I guess you could say) have more or less been trying for about 6 months now.
Since talking now, it's more of an official trying. We're both on the same page. I wasn't aware he was trying, but I knew I wanted a baby.

I'm just frustrated...

Quoting hypnautica:

With dealing with infertility for 8yrs and no Im not a doc but please listen to my advice. If they arent willing to do anything at the year mark then either 1. find a new gyno or 2. see a reproductive endocrinologist. If you have an egg reserve issue, there is a chance you may only have months to get pregnant. That is my a hormone test is so very important. A friend of mine had her AMH tested and she was told hers was so low, IVF was her only option and she had about 6-12 months left before her time was up and she is only 28. Infertility isnt anything to play with and honestly a Gyno doesnt know where near as much as an RE does. I have been through 3 RE clinics and 3 IVFs, so I pretty much so know what I am talking about(no I dont know everything). 2yrs is ridiculous and I do not agree with it.

mamatink7
by Franceska on Jun. 4, 2014 at 7:31 PM

depending on your ages (35 TTC 6 months will treat you 25-30 1 year+) 

good idea though at least talking to your dr/ ob about whats going on, at least she will check you fully before officially TTC (blood work and your history).

good luck and baby dust

Amanda-xo-
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 9:24 PM
Yeah. We're both 23.
My ex is 26.

Quoting mamatink7:

depending on your ages (35 TTC 6 months will treat you 25-30 1 year+) 

good idea though at least talking to your dr/ ob about whats going on, at least she will check you fully before officially TTC (blood work and your history).

good luck and baby dust

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