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TTC - Trying to Conceive TTC - Trying to Conceive

infertilty and miscarriages suck!

Posted by on Jul. 11, 2014 at 8:53 AM
  • 17 Replies
2 moms liked this

 So I just wanted to share some thoughts roaming through my busy little head. Yesterday we closed on our first home. It was exciting. I took my parents through the tour and when we got to the "Guest Room" we had a surprise sign waiting for them...Pink or Blue a Baby's Due - Coming in March. My mom jumped up like a crazy women and my dad started tearing up. It was the best surprise ever since I had called my mom in tears last week thinking AF had come. Well then my mom went on to look at my dad and say should we tell them...WHAT? Your brother and sister in law are pregnant too and due in February. I know I should be happy, but I was a little sad. I wanted to give them their first grandchild. I wish I liked my sister in law better. We are not enemies. Just different. Then my parents were like this time you better not say anything til 12 weeks..Like everyone is waiting for me to miscarry again. I am nervous enough about that. I kinda feel like I was fooled. We saw my brother and Sister in law like 3 times in the past month...when the whole time the secret was on me. I guess I just got annoyed too because it was such a battle to get pregnant and it seems so easy for everyone else. I will never take pregnancy for granite. Maybe God knew I needed this now. My friends being pregnant is one thing, but I don't know if I could have dealt with this news as classy as  I know I should have if AF really did come.

I am wishing you all babies really soon. I am not safe yet, and reminded of how sucky infertility is. BABY DUST TO ALL OF YOU WONDERFUL FUTURE MOMMIES!

by on Jul. 11, 2014 at 8:53 AM
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Replies (1-10):
stcy79
by Stacey on Jul. 11, 2014 at 9:01 AM

Yes it does suck! Are u close to ur brother? Ur kids could be best of friends, or fight like siblings how many wks are u now?

Our angel was born to heaven on 1/10/2014 at 14wks 3days.

froyogal
by Bronze Member on Jul. 11, 2014 at 9:05 AM

 My brother and me are not really close, but he has a huge heart and would be there for me in a second. Maybe our kids will bring us closer. I will be ONLY 5 weeks on Saturday. I think I found out wayyy too soon!!! LOL

Quoting stcy79:

Yes it does suck! Are u close to ur brother? Ur kids could be best of friends, or fight like siblings how many wks are u now?

 

MrsA0625
by Gold Member on Jul. 11, 2014 at 10:57 AM
Maybe they didn't tell you when you saw them because even though your relationship is strained they didn't want to hurt you because if what you've been going through.
akrogers13
by Silver Member on Jul. 11, 2014 at 11:06 AM
I got pregnant a few days before my sil after she battled with infertility for 18 months... it sucked because my baby was never as important.. and then we lost our baby and I it made it worse. Try to be happy for your sil as every baby is a blessing.. don't make her feel like her baby is any less significant (I'm sure you won't, and I'm sure my sil doesn't do it intentionally)... what my sil failed to remember was that I struggled with infertility with our son...

It was really sucky of everyone keeping it a secret from u and super ducky for your parents to tell you right then and there.. almost like they stole your thunder.. I'm a little pissedfoff for you. A good thing that could come from this is building a stronger relationship with your sil and that your baby will have a cousin so close in age!! My dd had a cousin only 10 weeks younger and they were like siblings! Always has someone to play with etc.

Btw I bet your baby will be cuter ;-)
akrogers13
by Silver Member on Jul. 11, 2014 at 11:08 AM
Lol I'm 4 weeks today but found out on Monday! It's been a long week already!

Quoting froyogal:

 My brother and me are not really close, but he has a huge heart and would be there for me in a second. Maybe our kids will bring us closer. I will be ONLY 5 weeks on Saturday. I think I found out wayyy too soon!!! LOL


Quoting stcy79:

Yes it does suck! Are u close to ur brother? Ur kids could be best of friends, or fight like siblings how many wks are u now?


 

froyogal
by Bronze Member on Jul. 11, 2014 at 11:15 AM

 Oh yes, they were definitely being sensitive to us. My mom said that my brother wanted to wait until we closed on our house so we could have our moment. I think thats sweet.

Quoting MrsA0625: Maybe they didn't tell you when you saw them because even though your relationship is strained they didn't want to hurt you because if what you've been going through.

 

Lmallonee
by Silver Member on Jul. 11, 2014 at 11:22 AM
Relax Hun! I just know this time is going to be different for you! I don't believe in the whole not telling people till you are so far along thing. As soon as we get pregnant and have our first US I will let the cat out of the bag lol. Even if I had a pregnancy that ended in miscarriage I would still celebrate the time before that happens.

Love how you told your parents ;). I can't wait to have that moment.
froyogal
by Bronze Member on Jul. 11, 2014 at 11:23 AM

 Thanks! I will definitely be happy for her, and I know she will be happy for us too. She has her own battles with type diabetes. We are both high risk so healthy babies are all thats important. Just ranting like a crazy gal. :) I am sorry that happend to you with your family. We all face our own battles, and sometimes the most put together people are going through stuff and we forget. I am sorry for your loss. I am glad your daughter had such a great playmate. It will all work out. Just lots of random thoughts and fears. Keep me posted on your pregnancy. We have so far to go,but its exciting.

Quoting akrogers13: I got pregnant a few days before my sil after she battled with infertility for 18 months... it sucked because my baby was never as important.. and then we lost our baby and I it made it worse. Try to be happy for your sil as every baby is a blessing.. don't make her feel like her baby is any less significant (I'm sure you won't, and I'm sure my sil doesn't do it intentionally)... what my sil failed to remember was that I struggled with infertility with our son... It was really sucky of everyone keeping it a secret from u and super ducky for your parents to tell you right then and there.. almost like they stole your thunder.. I'm a little pissedfoff for you. A good thing that could come from this is building a stronger relationship with your sil and that your baby will have a cousin so close in age!! My dd had a cousin only 10 weeks younger and they were like siblings! Always has someone to play with etc. Btw I bet your baby will be cuter ;-)

 

MrsA0625
by Gold Member on Jul. 11, 2014 at 11:24 AM
That's very sweet of him.

I can understand your sadness. But since you are pregnant now the best thing for baby is to not get upset. Stress is the worst thing for a baby. Just be happy for others, don't let yourself feel like everyone is expecting a miscarriage and just enjoy the time you have. It will be the best thing for you and for baby.

Quoting froyogal:

 Oh yes, they were definitely being sensitive to us. My mom said that my brother wanted to wait until we closed on our house so we could have our moment. I think thats sweet.


Quoting MrsA0625: Maybe they didn't tell you when you saw them because even though your relationship is strained they didn't want to hurt you because if what you've been going through.

 

froyogal
by Bronze Member on Jul. 11, 2014 at 11:27 AM
2 moms liked this

 Yes I need to relax. LOL I am so worried. I can't wait for our first ultrasound. Only 2 more weeks to go.Woo hoo. Yes, I am all about creative ways to tell my parents because it is such a special moment . Last time it was christmas and I told my parents that one of the presents got pushed under the couch. Then I bought them each a grandma and grandpa gift. That was special too. Moments that I will always remember. I hope you get your chance soon.

Quoting Lmallonee: Relax Hun! I just know this time is going to be different for you! I don't believe in the whole not telling people till you are so far along thing. As soon as we get pregnant and have our first US I will let the cat out of the bag lol. Even if I had a pregnancy that ended in miscarriage I would still celebrate the time before that happens. Love how you told your parents ;). I can't wait to have that moment.

 

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