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mixed emotions =\

Posted by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 7:04 AM
  • 7 Replies

Hello ladys, for those of you who know me !str let me appoligise for I have no been on here in a long time, & anyways if u do you me you already know I have been on a roller coaster with my babys father sence I was pregnant

So Let me try to make this as short as possable. my daughters father got locked up when she was a month old 7 has been relised as of dec,1st, we tryed getting back together for about a week & it didn't work out, he lives 6 hours away from us now but the whole time he was locked up we were broken up being that I found out he cheated on me with Two different girls while I was pregnant, my daughter is now a year in a hafl will be two in july. Well reccently we are getting along & talk on the phone alot, we both have our own lives that are different from each other, he works & lives all the way over there & I work & take care of my baby & live where I do, we both are dateing other people but they are some what new relationships, lately I have missed him so much, I look at my daughter & am constantly thinking like, she is SO bveautiful, & fun & makes my day, how can he choice to live where he does & not be around us, But I also am confussed about why I miss him so much, I'm not sure if its because he now has someone els in his life & I hear them laughting on the phone & what not & makes me feel like I just got throwen to the side or if I truely miss him for him & I mean we do have a child together & we have a three year history & have been through so much togetehr I just think I grew up with in the last year or so while being a mother & he was in jail so grew up but in different ways. IDK please give me some advise maybe if u have ever felt this way or whats ur take on this situation I'm really hurting inside & I just wanna know why I'm feeling this loss I guess

Thanks for your time I know this was kinda long

by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 7:04 AM
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Replies (1-7):
JayBearsmomma
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 9:09 AM

 Well in my situation i lost my virginity to my sons father. he was the love of my life and he loved me (so he said) . its a LONG story but now he is 22 with 5 kids and my son is his first. we went back and forth for the longest and it was a complete waste of time. When i started dating some one he would try to talk to me and vise versa. You were like me i thought why wouldnt he want to be around. Honestly he cheated on u while u were pregnant , he is with some one now and even if he does want to get back together do u really think he will be faithful, he will probably keep the girl on the side or somthing or just not tell her. I understand the missing him, but like i tell my self look how far you have come without him. You are doing an amazing job ! Really how will he make things better? He has been to jail which will make it hard for him to get a job and he has had plenty of time to step up and be a father, and move closer. Or he would be driving down every week or every other week. Once i let go of my sons father i let a man in that is a better father to my son than i could ever imagine. But by going back so many times i did alot of damage to my self esteem and it caused alot of pain in my heart. If i would have let go earlier i could have been happier along time ago.

I hope this helps.

YoungNconfused6
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 9:48 AM

wow thank you alot, I really have come pretty far with out him, & I do really care about my boyfriend that I'm with now, I just am still inlove with him so I dont feel like I could ever wholely give someone my heart until I get over him & I'm not sure how to. We have been together on & off for 4 years now

Quoting JayBearsmomma:

 Well in my situation i lost my virginity to my sons father. he was the love of my life and he loved me (so he said) . its a LONG story but now he is 22 with 5 kids and my son is his first. we went back and forth for the longest and it was a complete waste of time. When i started dating some one he would try to talk to me and vise versa. You were like me i thought why wouldnt he want to be around. Honestly he cheated on u while u were pregnant , he is with some one now and even if he does want to get back together do u really think he will be faithful, he will probably keep the girl on the side or somthing or just not tell her. I understand the missing him, but like i tell my self look how far you have come without him. You are doing an amazing job ! Really how will he make things better? He has been to jail which will make it hard for him to get a job and he has had plenty of time to step up and be a father, and move closer. Or he would be driving down every week or every other week. Once i let go of my sons father i let a man in that is a better father to my son than i could ever imagine. But by going back so many times i did alot of damage to my self esteem and it caused alot of pain in my heart. If i would have let go earlier i could have been happier along time ago.

I hope this helps.


mamajen07
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 10:51 AM

don't kid yourself =) i doubt he's changed, at all. if he's cheated on you in the past, he knows he can get away with it, and he's bound to do it again. you said it yourself when you said you have a child together. that forever "bonds" the parents, whether they like it or not. just move on with your life and don't bother giving him the time of the day! =)

is he pursuing you now? while he is seeing someone? that should speak volumes as well - if he is.

JayBearsmomma
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 1:29 PM

 

Quoting YoungNconfused6:

wow thank you alot, I really have come pretty far with out him, & I do really care about my boyfriend that I'm with now, I just am still inlove with him so I dont feel like I could ever wholely give someone my heart until I get over him & I'm not sure how to. We have been together on & off for 4 years now

Quoting JayBearsmomma:

 Well in my situation i lost my virginity to my sons father. he was the love of my life and he loved me (so he said) . its a LONG story but now he is 22 with 5 kids and my son is his first. we went back and forth for the longest and it was a complete waste of time. When i started dating some one he would try to talk to me and vise versa. You were like me i thought why wouldnt he want to be around. Honestly he cheated on u while u were pregnant , he is with some one now and even if he does want to get back together do u really think he will be faithful, he will probably keep the girl on the side or somthing or just not tell her. I understand the missing him, but like i tell my self look how far you have come without him. You are doing an amazing job ! Really how will he make things better? He has been to jail which will make it hard for him to get a job and he has had plenty of time to step up and be a father, and move closer. Or he would be driving down every week or every other week. Once i let go of my sons father i let a man in that is a better father to my son than i could ever imagine. But by going back so many times i did alot of damage to my self esteem and it caused alot of pain in my heart. If i would have let go earlier i could have been happier along time ago.

I hope this helps.

 

 If u have been on and off for 4 years now.. thats about how long me and my sons father were, u have to relieze that is long enough for someone to make things work. if its been on and off then the relationship was never stable to begin with. I would say enjoy getting to know the person u are with each day i will get easier and u will slowly begin to let go when u see that your life is better without him. If u go back you could lose the opprotunity for ur child to have a father figure. sounds like u really like this other guy and he has been good to u. i beg u please dont let that go for someone who has hurt u over and over. u will regret it.

melodysmamma410
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 1:59 PM

wow im in the same boat besides i have a 22 month old and a 3 week old by the guy . i have this truely amzing guy that loves my girls more then anything and loves me but everytime thier dad finds out im with someone else he comes running back with the i miss you yada yada ya n then i leave this guy that loves my kids and me n lucky for me he always waits for me  and then after we split their dad stops talkin to me hardly any at all the other girls replys have made me think alot n changed my mind bout goin back agin hopefully she helps u pick wats right for u and ur baby good luck

minimom424
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 2:34 PM

It's human nature to want what we can't have. ..And not want it once we have it =/

Emerald_storm01
by on Feb. 20, 2010 at 4:16 PM

hugs

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