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does this make me a bad parent or in baby daddy's terms a "bit**"???

Posted by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 8:16 PM
  • 22 Replies

 Ok so when i found out i was pregnant i told the BD but when i told him his thing got all mad because they had just got married after knowing eachother like 2 weeks...(i was 3months when i found out)...but anyways she flipped out and threatened to beat me up...and he continuesly denied the baby.....well then long story short they divorced because she was a whore and cheated...then he decided he wanted to be in the picture. so after alot of hard thinking and desicion making i gave him a chance since karman wasnt born yet.....well then he was in and out the whole time and then when i had her he showed up that night and claimed that he'd be back the next day but didnt come see her...because he hadnt got to hold her because my mom wouldnt let anyone but my nurse hold her to get washed up and everything until i was out of surgery from my csection....well ever since shes been born he'd come one day and then we wont hear from him for months and then he'll try to get her again and im iffy about it and he calls me a bit** ....but what he doesnt understand is that i dont want her to be hurt and i dont want her to be confused. my boyfriend josh has been the one here all along and has been the one raising her she is practically his daughter as well...he's been here since i was 4months along...and the BD wanted to kick his ass because he thought josh had something to do with my desicions....i got the dna proof but we havent went to court for anything else. well the most recent time BD came and got her he wouldnt bring her home at the time i said to. because HE made the stupid choice to be gone for two months or so...so he wanted a longer time...and he was going to try and keep her for a couple days and i dont even let her stay with my mom. so why the heck would i let her stay with him i dont know his address or how to get ahold of him because my mom has the numbers and she had to work. so he kept making up excuses, and everything, and after i had been transfered thru the sheriff and city police about 100 times to find out what to do...he found out i called them and decided to bring her home...but i didnt say anything to him i just grabbed karman and her things and shut the door in his face because honestly i wanted to beat the hell out of him. (im so insecure about him taking her because he used to always talk about going to tennesse or kansas, so thats why i freaked soo easily...WHO WOULDNT??) But i havent been able to talk to the prosecutor because i have no transportation during the day. and honestly i want him to have supervised visits or just have nothing to do with her because i dont want her hurt because he doesnt come around for like 2 or more months.....so WHAT SHOULD I DO??!!! i wanna be a good mommy. and i think i made a mistake telling him about her and letting him in. because now i have to fight about what i think is best for her....oh and everytime she comes home she smells funny like pot cigarretes and idk something else and he smokes cigs and his dad smokes pot. and i dont want her around that shit i told him not to smoke around her but guys are dumb and dont listen and he's the type who thinks he's always right. sooo yeah. what should i do please someone help me? he's only bought her diapers like twice ive been having to find things to sale to buy them for her and when josh had his job he was buying them almost every week so we'd be stocked up but shes a pee-pot and super shitter lol. so we go thru them fast.

by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 8:16 PM
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Replies (1-10):
kstanley_86
by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 8:22 PM
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You're a good mom bc you're thinking about the best interest of your daughter. I won't let my daughter's SD around her bc he's a violent alcoholic, smokes pot, was emotionally, mentally, and at times physically abusive, and he is full of broken promises. I don't want her being hurt or seeing how he is and thinking that's how a dad should be so unless he takes me to court and they make me she will not be seeing him.
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karmans_mommy
by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 8:40 PM

 yeah BD is full of broken promises beyond broken promises i wouldnt trust him with our dogs life lol....he's worthless and has to always smart off and make us argue and fight when he knows i dont need that or want that. he is a major pos and he even cheated on me when we were together. i dont trust him and unless he takes me to court then im not giving him rights...oh and he showed up unannounced that day when he wasnt going to bring her home

<3 sheri*

JayBearsmomma
by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 9:17 PM
Sounds to me like ur doing the right thing, I would tell him he needs to either be in the picture or not.
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MiCHELLEx
by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 9:22 PM
3 moms liked this
If you don't have a court ordered visitation for him, then don't let him take her. And take him to court for child support. If he tries to get visitation rights, tell them u want them supervised. You're looking out for your baby, absolutely nothing wrong with that.
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.Angelica.
by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 9:23 PM


Quoting JayBearsmomma:

Sounds to me like ur doing the right thing, I would tell him he needs to either be in the picture or not.


SaraZoey
by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 10:34 PM
I agree and because he is the baby's legal father he does not have to give her back on demand and the cops can't do anything unless you file for emergency custody.

Quoting MiCHELLEx:

If you don't have a court ordered visitation for him, then don't let him take her. And take him to court for child support. If he tries to get visitation rights, tell them u want them supervised. You're looking out for your baby, absolutely nothing wrong with that.
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lovemykidsxs3
by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 10:47 PM
2 moms liked this

You are not a bad mom. I went through this this with my older childs BD. He only wants to come see or take her when it's convenent for him.  She came home smelling like pot & was always sick. So I stopped it. He called me every name in the book but I don't care I will NEVER let her go back or see him. He ruined his chance & I have given him several of them. I don't want my daughter to get hurt with him coming and going when he pleases.  Us moms we only do whats best for our kid(s). You are doing the right thing. 

Vipergirl22
by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 11:06 PM

I agree with the others seems like you are doing what you feel is best for her. Heck if it were me I would take it a step further and have his rights suspended until he can be consistantly in her life and afford stuff for her. I don't know how child support works in your state but you can set it up so it comes directly from any check he gets because you don't trust he can pay for it.

huntin_mama
by on Nov. 6, 2011 at 11:16 PM

 File for custody. Request a guardian ad litem. Express your concerns to them. They will determine the best interest of your child. Request that if he goes X amount of time without seeing her, he has to do supervised visits until she's comfortable around him again. You can also have it put in the order for their to be no smoking or drinking in her presence.

Kristenn
by on Nov. 7, 2011 at 12:34 AM


Quoting .Angelica.:


Quoting JayBearsmomma:

Sounds to me like ur doing the right thing, I would tell him he needs to either be in the picture or not.


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