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Young Moms Young Moms

Being a young mom is so stressful and hard..

Posted by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 12:52 PM
  • 18 Replies

Hi everyone i just joined this site.. im new to this so this is my very first post. I first like to say that im 20 years old i have 2 kids.. i had my oldest when i was 16 and i went crazy after i had him because i never experienced freedom before that because of my living situation. and i also developed post partum depression and my babys father didnt care about his son. so i went out and partyed and all that while my gma took care of him. When i hit 17 i met my current fiance, we been together for 3 years he known my son since he was 11 months old. i ended up getting pregnant with my youngest at 18 ON THE PILL and i dont beleive in abortion so i kept him. i live in my own apartment with my youngest and his father my oldest still lives with him gma, because i cant handle this one and i have school and all kinds of stuff to do, i have bi polar dissorder so my moods are crazy im always depressed. i dont have a car right now and before when i did my oldest stayed with me ever other week and weekend and he was eventually going to live with me. i see him all the time.. the reason i dont have him now is because i cant take him to day care in the morning. i just feel like im not as strong as some mothers. i have alot of revenge in my life and im so angry at my past the way i was raised! its also a tough situation now because my fiance and i are just now trying to work things out because 2 weeks ago i told him to leave. im home alllll the time with my youngest and doing school cleaning i dont really know how to cook but i try and he works but after work would be out every day and i have no friends no more really. so its stressfull.. i hate my life sometimes.. sometimes i even hate being a mom because i cant stand anything i need to get myself better, i love my kids. i wrote this just for the girls out there that WANNA get pregnant at a young age, IT IS VERY HARD AND IT TAKES OVER UR LIFE! I NEVER HAD A LIFE TO GO OUT AND ALL THAT BECAUSE I WAS LOCKED IN MY ROOM ALL THE TIME AND WASNT SHOWN LOVE OR CARE SO I SNUCK OUT AND STARTED SKIPPING SCHOOL AND ACTING OUT.... ITS NOT EASY AT ALL BEING A YOUNG MOM ! THE ONLY EASY PART IS BEING PREGNANT! YOU HAVE SLEEP LOSS YOU HAVE NO TIME TO YOURSELF, YOU HAVE TO CARRY YOUR KIDS EVERYWHERE YOU GO, HARDLY GET TO GO OUT AND HAVE FUN, AND WERE STILL YOUNG MINDED SO WERE NOT FULLY MATURE. please no rude comments, i know i shouldve done better and still should but no one is in my shoes to understand...

by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 12:52 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mrs.novoa09
by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 1:01 PM
1 mom liked this
Awe I'm sorry to hear your struggling its not easy or a cake walk but I think the secret is having a good support system.
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piwife
by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 1:05 PM
1 mom liked this
Is hard at any age. But younger is harder. I have 2 kids and another on the way. Am 24
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halleysmomma
by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 1:15 PM
1 mom liked this

Being a mom isn't easy. It sounds like you have some emotional problems and maybe you should see a counselor or a doctor, and let them know how you're feeling.  From what you're saying a lot of those feelings are still left over from when you were younger and those need to be dealt with in a healthy way. And I completely agree with mrs.novoa you need a support system, if you look online you can probably find a support group for moms at a hospital or other place in your area. A support group would be perfect for you (in my opinion) because it would get you out of the house, and you'd get to vent how your feeling and meet some new people who could be potential friends. Alot of support groups for moms either have a free daycare service, or a low cost one while you're there and some even just let you bring your kids and they can interect with other kids. I really hope I helped in someway. And I truly hope things get better for you. Just remember untill you take care of yourself, it's near impossible to take care of your children. <3

insaneygolover
by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 1:17 PM
1 mom liked this

I know its hard. For cooking I use recipes off the internet, and my mom got me a cook book for x-mas. MY dad was the worst of the worst when it comes to parents I was raped from age 12-14. I took him to court and we lost our case in January after a 5 year court battle because of lack of evidence. I've been really depressed and I think I may need to go back to councilling. I was finished school when I had my daughter, but she's 5 months old and can be hard to deal with. I sprained my ankle a few days ago and I shouldn't be walking and its taking a long time to get better. At least my fiancee is really supportive.

 

My mom has assured me it will get easier.

IWannaLoveAgain
by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 1:43 PM
1 mom liked this

I didnt read most of your post, but I'd like to say that I had my first son when I was 16- second when I was 20.. it is hard. But whats important is to realize that your life will get better, you've just gotta put forth the effort and realize that you gotta go thru the hard times to get to the good times.

Forget about who you WANT to be, and be who you NEED to be!! You need to not dwell ont he past and think of what you could've or should've done, and move forward thinking only about the future! Good Luck Mama!!

unbrokenhellmus
by Julie on Mar. 8, 2012 at 1:50 PM

As a fellow mother with bipolar, I know how frustrating trying to be a good mother/wife while dealing with the mood swings can be. As one poster suggested, find a good doctor and therapist. Before I got on the right meds and started to really talk to someone about the things I had went through as a child and teen, I would blow up at the smallest things, or I would not get out of bed at all. At that point in my life I WAS a bad mother and wife. So please, if you have not gotten help then please get the help that you deserve. Noone deserves to have to deal with the complications of bipolar, when it can be controlled. Feel free to message and/or add me if you ever want to talk. I am always hear to lend a listening ear and shoulder to cry on. Best of luck Mama! And remember things will eventually even out and be better. 

~*~Julie~*~
Nena09alc
by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 1:56 PM
1 mom liked this

Hey i had my DD at 18. it is hard, im sorry were do you live? i live in the AZ. 

just remember your a mom, going out is ok, but not all the time. try getting a baby sitter at night, so your kids are asleep. i do that with DD once a week, i leave her with my mom so its easy on my mom and on the weekends so my mom is not stressed about work the next morning. maybe try getting a job at a daycare so you can be with the kids, and you earn money at the same time while they are there with you. 

Try going to school even part time. so that you dont have to struugle there are grant you can get and thats money you dont need to pay back and you meet so many people there people in the same situation as you. start building your support system that way. 

Im a single mom, her father bailed. my fam helps me alot. dont get discourages. it will get better count your blessing, these are the cards that you are given try your best to make this a possitive. 

LivingMyDreams2
by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 4:53 PM

yes ur right and i appriciate your answer... i dont have much of a support system at all.. my fiance now is trying to be the way i want him to be which is be more supporting and around more

LivingMyDreams2
by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 5:01 PM

haileys mama... thanks alot for what you wrote.. you all are very supporting and not judging me.. i already have a doctor and therapist im on welbutrin but it doesnt work.. i also struggled with addiction to opiots and it was so hard for me to get off of them because they would make me feel alive and normal not myself...i see him next week i am going to tell him i need something more!

LivingMyDreams2
by on Mar. 8, 2012 at 5:05 PM
1 mom liked this

well thanks everyone i cant keep hitting reply lol im new to this site... all i have to say is i never thought being a mom would be this stressfull.. it seems like my life is more stressfull then b4 i had kids:(

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