Put your kids first! YOU are not that important anymore!

[SundayXC]

You can solve pretty much ALL of your issues by putting your children first, from the get go. Let me tell you ALL that MEN are NOT as important as your children. Do you not think of them before you bring a man around? Do you think it is better for children to watch an unhealthy relationship? I honestly don't care if YOU love him, or if YOU don't want to be alone, if it is not what is BEST for your child, don't do it. That will save you a lot of hardship! If you are with a dead beat, drug user, abuser, or any of the million things I have seen posted on here, think of this. Do you want your son to turn out that way? Do you want your daughter with a man that treats her that way? And if they do that stuff, why in the HELL are you having MORE children with them. Hello!!! " Wow, this situation really sucks and is unhealthy, lets have another baby!"

If you can not put your children first, and you continuously have them thinking things will change, you are WRONG. Stop thinking about yourself! You are NOT as important as your children!

[SamiiSecurity]

Honestly, you ate offending me. How do you explain dads who have there for everything? How do you explain those single dads whose wife left them. You are very negative and are just going off your experience with one guy.

Quoting KRIZZ25:

 

Quoting SamiiSecurity:

I find this unfair. Not all men are like that. I know plenty of guys my age who take care of their children am love their girl.

Quoting KRIZZ25:

 

Quoting lizjones:

My fiance puts our son and I before himself or anyone else.

Quoting KRIZZ25:

 it a age thing ..before 30  women r like that ..once u hit 30 u get this  f men attitude ..i have never came across a man that would put his women/kids first .

 for now..thy all change..

 in time sweetie ..in time ..he will decide he don't like being daddy ,husband ..i thought i was in love 12 year ,3 kids..and it went bad.if it can happen to me it can happy to any one..and from being single 6 years i know all men in same way or form are the same way ..dirt bags.

[jaidenleesmom]

well said! i agree 100%. some women really do put other ppl or drugs or partying b4 their kids. a mother is not someone who always put their kids off on other ppl. there are "mothers" out there who will put their kids off on anybody who will take them just 2 go off and do whatever. as far as im concerned, thats not a mother all, just someone who had a baby. i would never put anything or anyone b4 my son ever. i have my son 24/7 and thats just how i like it. hes 2 yrs old and it took a lot of getting used 2 having a baby but the thought of giving up never crossed my mind. there are no words 4 the love that i have 4 my child. everything i do is 2 benefit him and if i want 2 get out the house and do something, its somewhere like park. if my son cant go, i dont want 2 go.
for you women who put someone or something b4 their kids or treat them bad, you dont deserve kids.
remember ladies: anyone can have a baby but it takes a real women 2 be a mother.

[insaneygolover]

 Oh lady, may I ask how old you are? I'm happy to say my mom kicked my dad out of our lives ( a bit too late, but meh) from an abusive situation, and I see where you are coming from. Why did you post here of all places?

-In a healthy relationship with fiance of 4 years and 19 year old mom to a 7 month old baby girl.

[JoLee12345]

Amen. Although my marriage in a sense comes first sice he is their father and a bad marriage would effect them horribly! Now if dh were awful or something, they would come first, but he is great!

[a5hl3yC]

WHAT!!!! You are saying you are in a healthy relationship? Not even more than a couple months ago you were asking for help because you were so depressed and started to have sex with OTHER MEN because your SO had you create an account on a dating website because he "didn't want to be with you anymore." Do you have multiple personalities or was that just some sort of a sick joke?

Quoting insaneygolver:

 Oh lady, may I ask how old you are? I'm happy to say my mom kicked my dad out of our lives ( a bit too late, but meh) from an abusive situation, and I see where you are coming from. Why did you post here of all places?

-In a healthy relationship with fiance of 4 years and 19 year old mom to a 7 month old baby girl.

[a5hl3yC]

OP I understand what you are saying. It makes enough sense to me. I think people aren't seeing the big picture. It's not like these people can't change but why put your young child in the line of fire? Why allow them to watch drug deals, heavy withdrawals, abuse? It's not easy to leave but a strong person will for the right reasons and if he's the right guy he will change given the time apart and be able to join the family once again when he is ready to take the part as a father.