Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Young Moms Young Moms

New and Scared

Posted by on May. 7, 2012 at 12:14 PM
  • 19 Replies

Hi. My name is Hope and I am 16 years old. I am due in September and I am so scared. Yes, I am with the father and he is great. But I have never experienced anything like this before. I am worried that I won't know what to do. How do you know how to be a good mother?

by on May. 7, 2012 at 12:14 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
NICHOLE87
by on May. 7, 2012 at 12:22 PM
1 mom liked this
You will be great mom n it come natural
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
daisyvictor
by on May. 7, 2012 at 12:24 PM
Hey hope my name is Daisy.I am now a proud mother of two boys, and I had my first boy at 16, and im 19 now.You dont have to worry about anything, when you see your baby your heart will let you see how to care for your little one. At first you might be scared even to hold your baby because thats how i was at first, but then it gets easier because you will know what to do,its just this amazing mother instinct we have:)
tm88rn
by on May. 7, 2012 at 12:34 PM

Hi Hope. My name is Taryn. I'm 23, so a bit older than you. But I had the same fears when I first got pregnant. I was 21, and married, and we'd been trying for 2 years, but with the role model I'd had (my mother), I was terrified that I would be a terrible mother, that I couldn't be a good mother, that it just wasn't in me. Throughout my pregnancy, I loved my babies and I knew I loved them, but I was still terrified. I read all the parenting books, talked to other mothers, and did what any expectant mother does, I learned about being a mother. But when my boys were born, I didn't use what I'd read. I used what came naturally. I loved my boys, and that was what mattered. I'm not a perfect mother, but I am an amazing mother, the best I can possibly be. Instinct will take you far. There are some things that you will need to learn, like changing a diaper, how to bathe a baby, that sort of thing, but that is what those books are for. Read them and educate yourself as much as you can, knowledge is power. But in the end, it comes down to instinct and simply loving your child. Good luck, and if you ever want to talk, I'm here.

Taryn

Wife to Brandon 7-2-2007

Mother to Payton Brandon and Benson Michael 5-8-2011, and  Trinity Juliana Hope  5-1-2012

1.hot.mama2005
by on May. 7, 2012 at 12:36 PM
1 mom liked this
It will come naturally. Once your little one arrives, your maternal instincts will kick in. :)
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
gypsyhope
by on May. 7, 2012 at 12:42 PM

Hi Daisy. I hope you are right. I know a lot of other girls do it. My sister had her first baby at 17 and she did great. My mom had 2 kids by the time she was 17. But she isn't around to help me now. I guess I am just nervous.

Quoting daisyvictor:

Hey hope my name is Daisy.I am now a proud mother of two boys, and I had my first boy at 16, and im 19 now.You dont have to worry about anything, when you see your baby your heart will let you see how to care for your little one. At first you might be scared even to hold your baby because thats how i was at first, but then it gets easier because you will know what to do,its just this amazing mother instinct we have:)


gypsyhope
by on May. 7, 2012 at 12:48 PM

HI Taryn. Thank you. That all sound slike good advice. I hope you are right about the instincts. I am worried that I won't have any. Is that silly? Maybe so. I am just worried I guess. My sister has kids and she can teach me the basic stuff. But she doesn't live near me really so she won't be much help.

Quoting tm88rn:

Hi Hope. My name is Taryn. I'm 23, so a bit older than you. But I had the same fears when I first got pregnant. I was 21, and married, and we'd been trying for 2 years, but with the role model I'd had (my mother), I was terrified that I would be a terrible mother, that I couldn't be a good mother, that it just wasn't in me. Throughout my pregnancy, I loved my babies and I knew I loved them, but I was still terrified. I read all the parenting books, talked to other mothers, and did what any expectant mother does, I learned about being a mother. But when my boys were born, I didn't use what I'd read. I used what came naturally. I loved my boys, and that was what mattered. I'm not a perfect mother, but I am an amazing mother, the best I can possibly be. Instinct will take you far. There are some things that you will need to learn, like changing a diaper, how to bathe a baby, that sort of thing, but that is what those books are for. Read them and educate yourself as much as you can, knowledge is power. But in the end, it comes down to instinct and simply loving your child. Good luck, and if you ever want to talk, I'm here.


tm88rn
by on May. 7, 2012 at 12:52 PM

My mother wouldn't have known how to be a mother if her life depended on it. When I say my childhood was hell, I mean that quite literally, and it was thanks to my mother, or rather, her lack of being a mother. I was terrified that those instincts wouldn't be there. My mother hadn't had any, why should I? I mean, where would I have gotten them? I had no experience with children really. But the fact that I was worried about caring for my children, about giving them what they needed, about loving them and caring for them, well, that is those instincts. That is proof that I am nothing like my mother and that I have what it takes to be a good mother. Your feelings, your worry about being a good mother, proves the same. You have those instincts. Your worry isn't silly, but it is groundless. Your fears prove that. 

Quoting gypsyhope:

HI Taryn. Thank you. That all sound slike good advice. I hope you are right about the instincts. I am worried that I won't have any. Is that silly? Maybe so. I am just worried I guess. My sister has kids and she can teach me the basic stuff. But she doesn't live near me really so she won't be much help.

Quoting tm88rn:

Hi Hope. My name is Taryn. I'm 23, so a bit older than you. But I had the same fears when I first got pregnant. I was 21, and married, and we'd been trying for 2 years, but with the role model I'd had (my mother), I was terrified that I would be a terrible mother, that I couldn't be a good mother, that it just wasn't in me. Throughout my pregnancy, I loved my babies and I knew I loved them, but I was still terrified. I read all the parenting books, talked to other mothers, and did what any expectant mother does, I learned about being a mother. But when my boys were born, I didn't use what I'd read. I used what came naturally. I loved my boys, and that was what mattered. I'm not a perfect mother, but I am an amazing mother, the best I can possibly be. Instinct will take you far. There are some things that you will need to learn, like changing a diaper, how to bathe a baby, that sort of thing, but that is what those books are for. Read them and educate yourself as much as you can, knowledge is power. But in the end, it comes down to instinct and simply loving your child. Good luck, and if you ever want to talk, I'm here.



Taryn

Wife to Brandon 7-2-2007

Mother to Payton Brandon and Benson Michael 5-8-2011, and  Trinity Juliana Hope  5-1-2012

Dino2012
by Bronze Member on May. 7, 2012 at 12:57 PM
hey hun. dont be scared. i know i was scared and the father of the baby was always telling me i'll be a great mother. even though i know how to take care of kids and i love them. its different being a mommy, you cant give them back when they get on your nervous. lol. but it does all come naturally once they are born. my daughter is about to be a month old. i just turned 17. and there days i feel like a horrible mother. and no one wants to listen to me. but then i feel like a great mother cause she knows how to make me feel specail. babies are amazing and such a blessing. you'll be a great mother! if you need someone to talk to, you can always talk to me :) just send me a message. :) good luck hun!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
gypsyhope
by on May. 7, 2012 at 1:24 PM

Thank you. It's all so overwhelming I guess,

Quoting Dino2012:

hey hun. dont be scared. i know i was scared and the father of the baby was always telling me i'll be a great mother. even though i know how to take care of kids and i love them. its different being a mommy, you cant give them back when they get on your nervous. lol. but it does all come naturally once they are born. my daughter is about to be a month old. i just turned 17. and there days i feel like a horrible mother. and no one wants to listen to me. but then i feel like a great mother cause she knows how to make me feel specail. babies are amazing and such a blessing. you'll be a great mother! if you need someone to talk to, you can always talk to me :) just send me a message. :) good luck hun!


gypsyhope
by on May. 7, 2012 at 1:28 PM

I don't think mt mother was able to fdeal with our lifestyle.  We are gypsies.   Real ones.  She wanted to be more Western.  She left us when I was 7.

Quoting tm88rn:

My mother wouldn't have known how to be a mother if her life depended on it. When I say my childhood was hell, I mean that quite literally, and it was thanks to my mother, or rather, her lack of being a mother. I was terrified that those instincts wouldn't be there. My mother hadn't had any, why should I? I mean, where would I have gotten them? I had no experience with children really. But the fact that I was worried about caring for my children, about giving them what they needed, about loving them and caring for them, well, that is those instincts. That is proof that I am nothing like my mother and that I have what it takes to be a good mother. Your feelings, your worry about being a good mother, proves the same. You have those instincts. Your worry isn't silly, but it is groundless. Your fears prove that. 

Quoting gypsyhope:

HI Taryn. Thank you. That all sound slike good advice. I hope you are right about the instincts. I am worried that I won't have any. Is that silly? Maybe so. I am just worried I guess. My sister has kids and she can teach me the basic stuff. But she doesn't live near me really so she won't be much help.

Quoting tm88rn:

Hi Hope. My name is Taryn. I'm 23, so a bit older than you. But I had the same fears when I first got pregnant. I was 21, and married, and we'd been trying for 2 years, but with the role model I'd had (my mother), I was terrified that I would be a terrible mother, that I couldn't be a good mother, that it just wasn't in me. Throughout my pregnancy, I loved my babies and I knew I loved them, but I was still terrified. I read all the parenting books, talked to other mothers, and did what any expectant mother does, I learned about being a mother. But when my boys were born, I didn't use what I'd read. I used what came naturally. I loved my boys, and that was what mattered. I'm not a perfect mother, but I am an amazing mother, the best I can possibly be. Instinct will take you far. There are some things that you will need to learn, like changing a diaper, how to bathe a baby, that sort of thing, but that is what those books are for. Read them and educate yourself as much as you can, knowledge is power. But in the end, it comes down to instinct and simply loving your child. Good luck, and if you ever want to talk, I'm here.

 



Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN