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Please Helpp! >.

Posted by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 5:14 PM
  • 14 Replies

 Well I'll be having my little one in October and I'm 17. I was just wondering if anybody has had a problem with grandparents trying to be with the baby all the time because my boyfriend's mom wanted a child before I got pregnant so I'm worried that it might cause problem's meaning she'll always want to have the baby over. I've been stressing out because this is my first child of course and I'm in mommy mode haha and i feel posessive and i know she'll have her sometimes but i'm worried she'll alway's be asking or arguing with me because my boyfriend and I will be at seperate houses and knowing how she is i know she probably will. I'm just worried :/ please help!

by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 5:14 PM
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by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 5:23 PM

 It's your child. And she will just have to accept that. Be firm with her and don't apologize for telling her to back off. Allow her to be supportive and involved but don't be afraid to tell her when she's being a little too overwhelming. Discuss it with your boyfriend too, that way he can step in and back you up because he understands what you want. Just remember, its your baby and you make the choice about where he/she stays and who he/she is with for how long.

by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 5:48 PM
That actually happened to me :) and its hard bc she did and still dose want my daughter all the time but finally I had to tell her to back off and its ur baby not hers and it will be hard and u and ur boyfriend will probably will fight but in the end it will be better trust me
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 5:53 PM

Alright thankyou guy's so much :) but what if my boyfriend doesn't back me up? what if he want's the baby over there as much as she does?

by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 6:25 PM

If he doesn't understand, explain it to him, you are the one taking care of the baby.
My boyfriend's grandmother wants me to visit a lot with our daughter, but I usually only visit her once or twice a week. She's my daughter & I have my own life to take care of.
When my boyfriend was home, I would pack our daughter up & visit him almost everyday. He was away at college for this past school year & now he's at Basic training. It was so stressful, getting her all ready & then taking her over there & spending the day there. There were times where I just needed a break & just wanted to spend the day at home. My boyfriend understood, so there were a couple days where he would go work & we would stay home & relax.
Be clear about what you want & be firm, you're the mommy! :)

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by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 6:33 PM

my mother in law tried to play "mommy" but I took my spot back! 

by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 9:16 PM
Oh yeah, both my mom and MIL tried turning my kids into theirs, I made it very clear that wasn't going to happen. I am their mama, no one but I. They can be grandma, they have earned that, but I am mom.
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by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 9:21 PM
My MIL lives about 3 minutes away from us. She sees our kids at least once a week. It was hard until she realized being grandma was more fun than being mom. And until she was convinced I was doing a good job as mom. I hated my MIL, but now... I'm so glad she is around. She is still overwhelming at times but its all about respecting each other. You have to build the relationship, esp if you want it all to last.
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by Aubree on Jun. 19, 2012 at 9:09 AM
Yeah she probably will. If she's anything like my boyfriend's mom who had suffered several miscarriages and was hungry for a grandchild (from his much older sister) then yes. I had wanted an open adoption quite badly and she did a good job of bullying me into parenting. Now she tries to implement her own parenting style on Carter and it bothers me to no end. I can't wait until SO and I are able to move out!
by on Jun. 19, 2012 at 9:42 AM

Your child, your choice.

by on Jun. 19, 2012 at 10:38 AM

i've never had problems with my parents or in laws

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