Teenage Stepmoms?

[TeenageStepmom]

I looked everywhere on Google but I couldn't find anything like my situation.. my boyfriend is seventeen, and has a four month old daughter.. I was wondering if there's anyone on here that is in a similar situation? I have no idea what to do. He refers to his daughter as my step daughter and has asked me if I'm okay with Stepmom Status. We're engaged (I know, it seems young but we love each other and to each his own, right?) so I obviously plan on spending the rest of my life with him.. his daughter's mother is the epitome of psycho baby mama. I've tried being nice to her, she hates both of us. She is making up things about him hitting her and the baby. Now he has to have a social worker present to see the baby. He hasn't seen her in a month and a half. He wouldn't hurt either of them but I'm not getting into that. My issue is.. what on Earth do I do?? How do I be a stepmother at seventeen? I know I'm going to love this child like my own (haven't had the chance to meet her yet) and I don't want her mother making things up about me. I know that if the baby grows up around me, she'll see who I am, and that wont be a real issue but I don't want her to grow up with that kind of relationship, or lack thereof, between her mother, father, and stepmother.

[krayzbabylove]

Well if you are going to marry this kid, than you dont really have a choice as to if you want to be a step mom or not. The whole situation sounds like a nightmare to me. I really dont know what advice to give you.

[BeachMama05]

To bump the post to the top of the forum so other members can see it.

Quoting mlg9209:

Then why do you comment on here in the first place ?!

Quoting BeachMama05:

I am not a step mom so I have no advice :)

[mlg9209]

Oh hmmm

Quoting BeachMama05:

To bump the post to the top of the forum so other members can see it.

Quoting mlg9209:

Then why do you comment on here in the first place ?!

Quoting BeachMama05:

I am not a step mom so I have no advice :)

[feliciasmith]

BUMP!

[-KC-]

Of course he wouldnt fess up on putting his hands on her. Doesnt mean shes lying. I wouldnt get involved in that part since you will never know for sure. If hes a good parent, and treat his kid good thats what matters. If BM want to cause trouble, let him handle her. Im 18 my DH 26 who is the SD of my son. Im also pregnant by him. He has 2 kids from a previous marriage. Hes a great daddy.

[StepMomCoach]

When I was 18, I met a man that I thought loved me and would take take of me for ever. He had twin duahgters but his ex wouldn't let him see the girls. I thought se was crazy and cruel. This "ex fiance" would often be gone, leaving to work late nights, not be there when he said he would, isolate me in some way from my family (of course I only see this now that years have past), and my friends hated him.
I wanted to "save" him from himself, show him that he was a good person at heart.
So you, I'm an eternal optimist. I thought I could change him into the man I wanted him to be rather than seek the type of man I wanted. He kept wanting me to have a baby and something kept naggy at me to not do it.
After some very nasty events, I finally threw him out and met someone else.(second one wasn't much better). It took me a while to learn to pick the man that is already the way I want him and not a project, someone to mold into what I want.
I really recommend that you think this thing through.
What do you aspire to be when you're 25, or 35? Do you want a career, to travel, to have a home?
What would it feel like if you could have your life they way you really trully want?
Give yourself permission to dream and reach for the stars. And if this man can truly provide you with ALL that you are looking for, then go for it. If not, don't stay in a relationship that will only end in you becoming a single mom with lots of struggles in front of you.
You can do this. You deserve to live your life with passion and excitement.

[onekidmom]

To marry someone who already has children you have to be able to love his children as you would love your own or you mind as well walk away now. Seeing as how the baby is very small it should be a little bit easier for you to form a step-mom like relationship with her. Also it makes things a lot easier if you and the bilogical mother have a good relationship(Im not saying be her best friend)  it helps. All you and your fiancee can do is show the state you are better suited to raise the child than she is. Record everything she does. In the end the ones who keep their cool an go by the rules will be the ones who win. 

[Sunivondea]

I'm just lol

Kids these days.

[Sunivondea]

How old is your bf to where he has 2 kids already,

Quoting lamunecalinda:

hi my name is shalamarie aka shala; im 15 and and my boyfriend has 2 kids and his baby moms tried to cause problems with me so we had a sit down and we each talked out our problems and now we all get along. just support your boyfriend thru everything and try your hardest to ignore anything the babymoms is saying to you or causing problems for you

 

[HizzPrincess]

ive been with my fiance since.his daughter was 2, i was 14, weve been engaged since 15, and his daughter lives with us, im her step mom. you just have to love them and treat them like they are yours, remember to not force her to call u mom at any point in her life. dfs ex is psycho too which is why he has custody of Carrie. she assumes im trying to take her place but im not i have my kids to be mommy too. im justt a better mother figure to carrie than she could ever have been and it drives her nuts.