Question: Am I a bad person? A failure? A let down?
Total Votes: 23
I'm 5 1/2 months pregnant, and nothing in life is going right. I thought even with an unplanned pregnancy and me being only 17 i could still make it work with faith. I have a great guy that just bought a house for us and i adore him, but i hate when we get into fights, and he make me feel like im nothing. I know he doesnt mean to but hes really good at doing that to me.
I decided to finish school early and do summer work. Today i told him since school is my main focus i wanted to quit my job, finish school, and find a job later. Its really hard to work when ur pregnant might i add, and my job requires me standing on my feet for 5hrs, NO BREAK. He went off calling me selfish and said im a dissapointment which was really hurtful coming from him. He is the only person that didnt say that to me until now.
Today was just and awful day, I thought I gathered enough money to get my hair done but when I got there she told me it would be more, I asked if I could pay some now and some later and she told me no, and asked again and she said no again and asked me to leave. I cried as soon as I left the place cause I felt soo humiliated. I started to head home and noticed the car was on E. I got to the gas station and tried to use my card. It didn't work, I asked the cashier to take 15 from my card, declined. I asked her to do 10, declined. And finally 5.... Declined. I said ok and walked outside and sat in my car for awhile. I noticed the woman in line behind me was walking to my car so I got out and she told me she put $20 in my car. I told her thank you and hugged her and just cried in her arms. Now that I think about it I really wish I got her name. :/ even after she left I just sat there in the car and cried, I realized I'm the type of person that does things for others but nothing was ever done for me like that.
Anyway, when I say should have done the right thing im talking about abortion. I found out I was pregnant a little after 3months. I still had the time to do it but I froze when it came to, I just couldn't. But now that everything is going wrong and I'm low on cash there's no way I can support a child, and adoption is just sad and would kill me. I honestly don't know what to do. I feel so hurt and helpless right now. I've never felt this way in life and it's heartbreaking. Am I really a failure for attempting to do the right thing?