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Dont Know Where Else to Turn

Posted by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:14 AM
  • 54 Replies
I dont post too much on here but I dont know where else to go.

I am having a really really hard time. I am 18. Pregnant. Due August 16. Me and the dad broke up in January. We broke up for the best. And let me make this clear, I'm glad I'm not with him. He immediately got a new girlfriend, who has a one year old son. They now live together.

My ex plans to be around the baby, which is fine. But he is dragging his new girlfriend way to into the situation, he wants me to meet her and wants her at the hospital when the baby is born which isn't gonna happen.
Me and him had a conversation about it today and after he left my house his new girlfriend felt the need to write me on Facebook. Being completely rude. And made me really mad! Its way too long to even try to explain.

I have never said this to anyone, and never will again. But.
I had no idea how hard this was gonna be. I am jealous that he has someone and a perfect little family and I'm afraid my daughter will wanna be with them, not me. Its making me resent him and his girlfriend instead of trying to get along with them, I just find myself becoming more bitter.

I have pushed any chance of a good relationship out of my life, I am too stubborn and dont wanna get close to someone again like I did with my ex just to have it fail so miserably. I am scared. And too stubborn to tell anyone in my life how I really feel. And its so hard.

I also am freaked out because I am so stressed and worried and have so much going on I dont feel connected with my baby. I dont know how to fix me or where to begin.
Maybe someone can offer advice.?
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by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:14 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MsEmma88
by Member on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:22 AM
Stay strong mama. If y'all broke up n it was for the best then he's not a peach and their family is far from perfect. Just relax and focus onthings hung that baby off and making sure your set for baby to come home. Do you have support from friends or family?
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aslynnrachael
by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:23 AM
Okay one the whole girlfriend at the hospital is so stupid. I can't believe that even she thinks that she has the right to be there. A respectable person would know that they would not be welcome there. I'm still with the dad of my babies but I can understand where you are coming from about being jealous and thinking what you're thinking. Don't let that stuff bother you. The girlfriend will never take the place of you being the real mommy and the special bond between you and your baby. Keep your head up and stay strong. Don't let her think that you are jealous if her. Just live your life day by day with your baby and let them live whatever they got going and just don't care about what they have to say or what they are up to. Be confident in yourself and be the best mom you can be :)
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LittleUtahMommy
by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:25 AM
Thank you. I know, your right. I'm trying to and have been just focusing on preparing for baby, it gets me excited but at the same time I'm just so incredibly scared of what's to come I have a hard time feeling connected with her.
I have lots of family around and excited for me. I just dont feel like I can talk to anyone and admit my true feelings. I have never been a person that can do that very easy. I hate it.


Quoting MsEmma88:

Stay strong mama. If y'all broke up n it was for the best then he's not a peach and their family is far from perfect. Just relax and focus onthings hung that baby off and making sure your set for baby to come home. Do you have support from friends or family?

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terra52590
by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:25 AM
I didn't feel connected with my baby until she was a month old I felt so shitty but I was told it was normal and it passed now I'm attached lol
as for his gf at the hospital that's pushing it I'd throw a fit luckily you can tell security not to let her in (that's what I did with my sister long story)
Just because she has a baby and is playing house with her doesn't mean they are perfect when I was little my father was happily married and my mom was always single and I prefered her over him so don't worry about that
I do suggest when LO is born figure out what you are doing and if ex wants to see it he needs to pay child support.
Hang in there mama and don't get too stressed go take a nice warm bath and relax if you ever want to talk you can message me and add me :)
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SamiiSecurity
by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:27 AM
1 mom liked this
I'm 19 and my little boy is 3 weeks old.
When I first found out I was pregnant I was scared. I was a druggie. Me and the dad are still together. But we went through some insane rough patches during my pregnancy. He was still getting stoned and I was jealous. At work he got to see a bunch of hot chicks, and I felt gross because I was pregnant.
I don't know exactly how your feeling, but it's hard in the beginning. I resented my baby too at first. But as soon as my son was put in my arms I fell head over heels in love.
You are your little girls mom, she will love you and want you more then anyone else! Plan and simple.
I'm sorry your going through so much, I really am. It is hard to be young and pregnant; you don't know what to expect. But it gets easier, I promise.
If you ever need to talk feel free to message me.
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LittleUtahMommy
by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:28 AM
I agree! There is no reason she should go. And she isn't. Hospital security will take her out if she shows up. But they think I am just being mean.

I'm really trying not to let it bug me. It didn't at first but its been getting worse lately. I hope that I can have that bond with my daughter, it would help so much if I felt it now.
Thank.you. :)



Quoting aslynnrachael:

Okay one the whole girlfriend at the hospital is so stupid. I can't believe that even she thinks that she has the right to be there. A respectable person would know that they would not be welcome there. I'm still with the dad of my babies but I can understand where you are coming from about being jealous and thinking what you're thinking. Don't let that stuff bother you. The girlfriend will never take the place of you being the real mommy and the special bond between you and your baby. Keep your head up and stay strong. Don't let her think that you are jealous if her. Just live your life day by day with your baby and let them live whatever they got going and just don't care about what they have to say or what they are up to. Be confident in yourself and be the best mom you can be :)

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LittleUtahMommy
by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:31 AM
I'm so glad I'm not alone about that. It scares me that I wont ever feel it with her but I really hope I do.

I plan to call security if she shows up. I dont want her there and she has no business being there. I am going thru the state to.get child support. :)

Thanks so much. I will :)


Quoting terra52590:

I didn't feel connected with my baby until she was a month old I felt so shitty but I was told it was normal and it passed now I'm attached lol

as for his gf at the hospital that's pushing it I'd throw a fit luckily you can tell security not to let her in (that's what I did with my sister long story)

Just because she has a baby and is playing house with her doesn't mean they are perfect when I was little my father was happily married and my mom was always single and I prefered her over him so don't worry about that

I do suggest when LO is born figure out what you are doing and if ex wants to see it he needs to pay child support.

Hang in there mama and don't get too stressed go take a nice warm bath and relax if you ever want to talk you can message me and add me :)

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Payton_09
by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:32 AM
I don't think the new gf should be there if you don't want her to. You and him have a baby together not all 3 of you. Explain that to her and hopefully she gets it. You guys need to respect each other if he's going to be in the babies life. I wish you luck hun.
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LittleUtahMommy
by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:33 AM
Thank you so much.
It is really hard, no one warned me the emotional would be so killer.

I hope she does, I just couldn't take it if she wanted to be with them because I'm not.giving her a family or siblings.


Quoting SamiiSecurity:

I'm 19 and my little boy is 3 weeks old.

When I first found out I was pregnant I was scared. I was a druggie. Me and the dad are still together. But we went through some insane rough patches during my pregnancy. He was still getting stoned and I was jealous. At work he got to see a bunch of hot chicks, and I felt gross because I was pregnant.

I don't know exactly how your feeling, but it's hard in the beginning. I resented my baby too at first. But as soon as my son was put in my arms I fell head over heels in love.

You are your little girls mom, she will love you and want you more then anyone else! Plan and simple.

I'm sorry your going through so much, I really am. It is hard to be young and pregnant; you don't know what to expect. But it gets easier, I promise.

If you ever need to talk feel free to message me.

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LittleUtahMommy
by on Jul. 29, 2012 at 2:34 AM
1 mom liked this
Exactly. I hate that he has to be so rude and disrespectful then make me feel like the bad guy. Thank you.


Quoting Payton_09:

I don't think the new gf should be there if you don't want her to. You and him have a baby together not all 3 of you. Explain that to her and hopefully she gets it. You guys need to respect each other if he's going to be in the babies life. I wish you luck hun.

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