Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Married at 17 is HARD!

Posted by   + Show Post

ITS HARD! I love my husband to death but sometimes i want to rip my hair out! Anyone else feel like that sometimes? I don't know why he just lags EVERYTHING! The sink has been broken for about 2 weeks and everytime i ask him to fix it he says he's busy. He's not lying he is busy with work and he says thats important but this is important too. I have my mom and mother in law constantly bugging me to tell him to fix it and i just feel so frustrated! I don't know how to handle this situation. He works on iphones sells and buys them and all his iphone parts are all over the house the plates are pilled up in the kitchen i'm just fed up. He doesn't want me to ask anyone else to fix our sink but he won't do it himself. I heard that if our sink stays like this it will rott and we'll get all kinds of insects. It already STINKS! I'm so disgusted i feel like i can't take it anymore! Please give me some advice idk what to do how to talk to him. It's not like i yell i ask him nicely and he's the one to start yelling at me he's just become so mean lately. I feel like i can't talk to him without him yelling and getting irritated. 

by on Nov. 27, 2012 at 4:31 PM
Replies (41-45):
by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 5:40 PM
Yeah, i know what you mean. And no i do not work. I choose to stay home and take care of my daughter. And it is messed up that he yelled at you like that! You dont just start yelling at a pregnant person. And what you two wanted are very different. Plus yours is cheaper that $65!

Quoting teenmom379:

Quoting Nicki1995:

It is ok! I am here if you need to talk. I understand what you are going through. My hubby used to say that the money was his since he was the one that worked and he tried to buy what he wanted before what we needed. Thats when we had a talk. I told him that we were married so the money is OURS and that i was going to keep up with the money. Things are fine now, but he used to be pretty messed up about things. He never had a loving family though. It took me a little while to get him to help me during pregnancy and after i had the baby though.

Quoting teenmom379:

Quoting Nicki1995:

I got married at 16 (i am 17 now), and we are doing fine. Lol Sounds like he is just being an ass. My husband helps me as much as he can. My husbands family (which would be my in laws) hate me. The only people that like me and consider me family are his mom, uncle, and cousin. Everyone else hates my guts, and he has a big family. They consider him and my daughter their family, but not me. They havent seen my child but like 2 times (if even that) since she was born and she is 8 months. The only people that will end up having something to do with her from his side of the family are his mom, uncle, and cousin. Sorry for the vent....Lol Just tell him that you REALLY need the sink fixed now because you need to get things cleaned back up and he needs to help you

oh wow i can't imagine having my inlaws hate me. Thinking about it i don't think they consider me their own though. In the armenian culture it's a HUGE deal to get pregnant before getting married so i feel like my mother in law constantly looks down at me. But I have a great relationship with my sister in law. I love her and i really feel like she's whole hearted with me she even offered to be in the room with me in the hospital while i have the baby. Alen (my husband) is iffy about it. The thing with Alens mom is she constantly puts her kids down. Before Alen and I moved out from his moms house i felt like i hated his guts. Alens mom doesn't work so she was home 24/7 and the whole time all you would hear out of her mouth was complaining and just putting her own kids down. She did it so much especially about Alen that i just couldn't look at him. I feel like thats when we started loosing repect for each other yelling at each other cursing andstuff. It was HORRIBLE I regreted everything at the time but now that we moved out were seeing less of his mom and i feel like our relationship is getting a bit better. I feel like if the cursing and yelling that happened at his mom didn't happen he would respect me and he would do the things that i need him to do. He wouldn't lag it. I fell like if its important to him he'll go out of his way to get it done but if its important to me if its something i need he won't really care. For example he went and bought a 65 dollar game for himself yesterday. It got me really upset beceause when i needed maternity pants he would make it a big deal and say we don't have money. I need at least two new bras their all small on me i need new pants cause their torn up i wear his at home. There are things that i don't have and that i need I mean even him he needs undies but he goes and buys a game instead of the things we need and when i sit down and tell him that that upset me he gets all defensive. I am literally scared to talk to him because i feel like everytime i open my mouth he starts yelling and i sometimes can't control myself i'm human i have feelings too i start yelling and then we have this big fight over something sooo stupid. Idk how to make our relationship the way it was. Venting feels good though sorry i wrote so much i can't exactly talk to anyone about this. 

ohh i see. Yeah my hubby's a bit like that too. The other day we went to target he agreed to return his game because we can't afford to spend 65 bucks on a game. It's christmas we have gifts to buy and there are things that we both need and i told him i really needed cover up. I can't get out of the house without it i feel really embarrased. He started yelling saying that it's not fair that he has to return his game and buy my cover up. I felt horrible i started crying. I guess that made him sad that it made me cry so he ended up buying it for me. I wouldn't ask him for money if i was working but he won't let me work cause i'm pregnant. I'm hoping i'll be able to finish school soon and start doing something. It's frustrating to feel like you really need something but feel horrible for asking for it you know what I mean? Do you work? 

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 6:22 PM
Well it was becoming a sanitary issue. I am a sahm but if my dh wasn't fixing something that needed to be fixed and them became unsanitary I don't give a rats ass if he would get mad. My kids health come before his feeling especially when he's being a lazy ass. But I'm glad he fixed it for you. I suggest trying to learn these things yourself. It makes life so much easier when you don't have to nag him. Trust me.

Quoting teenmom379:

Quoting Hanab818:

I'd just hire someone if it stinks. My dh is like that to I have just learned to fix things myself. But granted he's at work or school 6 days a week and the one day he's off we take the kids out and then just never gets to what needs to be fixed.

I'm not working i'm trying to finish highschool at the moment so i don't have money to hire anyone. He would get mad either way though to hire someone without asking him. And he would say no if i do. I got him to temporariy fix it though so i'm finally able to wash the dishes. My house isn't a mess anymore thank god! I felt like I was going crazy! =] 

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 8:30 PM

The insects is what important I think you should get it fixed while he's at home and if he says something about it then stay calm and tell him it was the best decision....

by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 8:35 PM
All im going to say is no matter how bad things get you married him for better or worse. Dont let outsiders talk you into anything you married you man its about you two niw not about what you mom or step mother say. That would mess up a marriage
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by Member on Dec. 1, 2012 at 9:12 AM
Quoting teenmom379:

Well if writing a letter about your feelings helps get through to him then thats great! See how that goes because you are exactly right about how its not healthy for you both and the baby to be argueing like that.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN