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My child wants nothing to do with me

Posted by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 12:56 PM
  • 4 Replies

My relationship with his father was horrible. It took me 3 years to leave him finally. My son was 2 at the time. I got pregnant at 19. I was working a full time server job and enjoying that I could spend my money on myself.. anything I wanted. I had nice clothes, a nice car i took good care of.. I went out when I wanted. Partied. Had friends. Had HOBBIES.. writing, drawing, playing computer games.. Was planning on going to school someday for something that I enjoyed that would make me no money at all lol.

His father was a rebound.. the first time we had sex I got pregnant through a condom because it broke and he didnt care to stop. When I was ready to break things off, I found out I was pregnant and stayed with him. Through horrible mental abuse and mind games.. I stayed with him. Until I was done and told him to leave.

My son is 4, going to be 5 on the 16th. Things are horrible with him. Everything is about daddy. He is sick today so I went to pick him up and he cried when he saw me and said he wanted me to go away so he could stay with daddy.

I am solely responsible for him. I pay for his clothes. I keep a roof over his head. I feed him, bath him, pay for everything.. I work full time. I get no child support. I recently had to quit school because my parents kicked us out and I couldnt afford to continue going because I'm the only one paying bills. I dont even get to call in to work when I'm sick. I work and stress myself to the bone trying to make everything work for my children. My bank accounts in the negative. My parents have to buy my kids their christmas gifts. Had to give us a tree.

His father has no responsiblity.. only sees him when he wants to. I cant work two jobs because he refuses to watch him when he isnt at daycare. He will see him MAYBE once a week. Sometimes goes weeks without seeing him at all. He goes out with friends, parties, works as much as he wants, any hours he wants to.. he gave up nothing when I had my son. Not one thing.

My child wants nothing to do with me. Nothing. I gave up my entire life.. I turned it all into trash for him. Nothing about my life is enjoyable. I work and stress about paying bills and getting him the things he needs. I stress about his behavior, how to make him a good person. I have no free time. I dont get nights out. I literally gave up everything for him. I dont think I have a piece of clothing that cost more than 50 cents. I spend my days off running errands and in low income programs to make sure I can feed him and clothe him..

Anyone else in a situation where you gave up your entire life for a child who doesnt even like you? I'm so hurt and upset right now.

by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 12:56 PM
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Replies (1-4):
LynBoz
by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 12:58 PM
I'm sorry. Bump.
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MamaBear2cubs
by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 1:01 PM

How was his relationship with his Dad before he left? He just sounds confused and hurt by what is going on between the two of you. I highly doubt he dislikes you and it will get easier for him the longer daddy is out of the picture and his life is the same routine.

Kayere
by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 1:07 PM

We havent been together now for about 2 years. His father purposely makes things dramatic and difficult. A couple days ago I couldnt get my son to stop crying because I "screamed at daddy"... I had to yell at him several times to get out of my house before I called the cops because he walked in and started bitching about it being messy. ( It was messier than it should have been but I was sick and taking care of two sick kids by myself and still working)

The problem is daddy isnt really "out of the picture" he pops in and acts like hes saving Dakota all the time. If I yell at dakota to get his socks on because I've already asked him 4 times and he is ignoring me, his father will jump in and put his arm around him and tell me to stop yelling at him. He's makes everything out as me being a horrible mean mommy when I'm the only parent and he's dakotas friend.. Dakota has even started telling me I'm mean.

AdoptingMommy
by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 1:59 PM
Maybe you should take him for Child support first bc that will take away some stress
He will pay or go to jail. Dont let him do that to you.
Second maybe try just turning all things off, tv, games, music ect and try talking to hi. Ask him why he feels that way, tell him how it makes you feel and try to have him open up to you. He may not understand why your not there bc your workin and is confused. But if you get a few hundred $'s a month from your Ex, you & him can enjoy some time together doing fun things and re establish a positive relationship
Refrain from bad mouthing his dad
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