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16 with a 2year old daughter and 11 weeks pregnant with another. Advice?

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Hi, I am 16 years old. I have a 2 year old ( soon to be 3 in march 2013) and I am 11 weeks pregnant with another child as of today. I'm being told by some to abort the child and go on to college and live my life. I am not the selfish type to do such a thing but I'm being pressured into it. Advice please???! And yes, I have graduated highschool. Father is still in the picture as well. And I have held a full time (40hour) a week job for 13 months now. Please no rude comments .
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by on Dec. 13, 2012 at 9:55 PM
Replies (81-90):
stressedmama24
by Member on Dec. 13, 2012 at 11:52 PM
Idk maybe they.do.
..but just bc she is.very young doesnt.meam that.she cannot do well.for herself. If she works hard then she very well could make something of herself. She is just looking for encouragement. And i believe if she applys.herself then she can make a good decision for her and her children as far as what to do about this pregnancy. I had my first child at 18(got pregnant and married at 17). I worked hard to get where i am but it is thanks to having suppory and encouragement that i did it.


Quoting Chelsey191:

You posted like you thought you knew all about me. must be a stalker either that or really dumb and since you said you graduated I ruled that one out. Fyi, young moms is not the same as children becoming mothers. Though I wouldn't be surprised if they had a teen mom group on here.




Quoting stressedmama24:

Stalking? Wth hell.are u talking about u crazy nut?






Quoting Chelsey191:

I had my son at 24 not 13. I guess your stalking wasn't as thorough as it should be.








Quoting stressedmama24:

Okay u are in the young moms group as well so obviously u had kids at a young age too so take your own damb advice u hatefule bitch!










Quoting Chelsey191:

Advice is get some bc and better education on sex ed. Those babies deserve the best life at 16 can you really give them that?





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miranda_
by on Dec. 13, 2012 at 11:53 PM

First I've heard of it. But okay. 

Quoting stressedmama24:

Where i live there is a "work at your own pace school" so if u work hard and.do well u can graduate.early. my sister and cousin botg went there bc they HATED their public school. They worked hard and fast. My sis graduatef at 16 and cousin at 15(the youngest to ever graduate from that school) it was expensive but worth it for them.


Quoting miranda_:

Lol, at least I make sense to someone. When I read that OP graduated at 16, I wasn't sure if she meant she got her GED , because I never heard of someone graduating at 16.


Quoting Nicki1995:

Exactly. I would have graduated at 17 also, but i got my GED at 16. I also got married at 16 and had my child at 16 lol I havent heard of anyone graduating at 16. I was in college classes in 11th grade before i dropped out to get my GED and they still wouldnt let me graduate early lol


Quoting miranda_:

As I said, I started school a year early. I was four when I got placed into Kindergarten. Even being placed into Kindergarten a year early, I still wasn't able to graduate until I was 17. She would of had to started kindergarten when she was 3.


Quoting erinmomofone:

If her birthday is late and she graduated a year earlier. Like I was 17 graduated right before my 18th birthday on my normal graduation date so it's possible.





Quoting miranda_:

How are you sixteen and you graduated already? I started school a year early and I still wasn't able to graduate until 17.








Teenmommy1119
by on Dec. 13, 2012 at 11:53 PM
Man this post is crazy! I hardly get on here but this is just wow! I'm at a loss for words.
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stressedmama24
by Member on Dec. 13, 2012 at 11:57 PM
2 moms liked this
Its sad tho bc some.YOUNGER.mothers are more.mature and level headed than some older mothers :-/ it all just depends on the person and their circumstances. Just bc someone is very young does not mean that they are immature.


Quoting Ciaodarlings:

Right. Makes sense. :-)



Quoting Teenmommy1119:

Oh I know. I'm just saying that not every mom in here is older since it is a young moms group.





Quoting Ciaodarlings:

I think what Chelsey was getting at is that it shouldn't be assumed that we ALL had kids as teenagers. Because we didn't. I'm 23 and pregnant with my first. But, by society's standards, I am young (but a young adult versus a teenager).







Quoting Teenmommy1119:

Sorry to jump in on this.. But you are in a YOUNG MOMS group. Which means your going to get women/girls in here at any age. But I know there's a girl on here who had twins at the age of 14. You can be a mom at any age & give them a better life then some grown women. I had my son at 19 & I'm trying to give him the best life like the way I was raised. I have full support from my family & I am a single mom.. The circumstances may be different but the comment was kinda rude she's asking for advice not someone to bash her for the choices she made.









Quoting Chelsey191:

I had my son at 24 not 13. I guess your stalking wasn't as thorough as it should be.












Quoting stressedmama24:

Okay u are in the young moms group as well so obviously u had kids at a young age too so take your own damb advice u hatefule bitch!














Quoting Chelsey191:

Advice is get some bc and better education on sex ed. Those babies deserve the best life at 16 can you really give them that?



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Chelsey191
by Member on Dec. 13, 2012 at 11:58 PM
1 mom liked this
My comment was not meant to be rude, op is in a tough situation, she got herself there. She should be looking into what she can do to prevent a third repeat of this incident. And as for the 2nd part she should be asking herself that. As a mom every major decision I make I ask myself how it will affect my child and what kind of life do I want for him. I choose not to have another because I want my kids to have the best life and I know if I have another it will lower our standard Of living. I did not say I thought she couldn't do it but given her situation it would be smart to ask herself that. If she can deliver what she wants for her babies and what they deserve then by all means she should go for it. But she is the only one who truly knows that answer. If I thought she was incapable, I would have said as much, I didn't because I don't know her.I too am a single mom. I don't receive child support and ds bio dad has not seen him since he was 1 week old. I am in no position to judge.


Quoting Teenmommy1119:

Sorry to jump in on this.. But you are in a YOUNG MOMS group. Which means your going to get women/girls in here at any age. But I know there's a girl on here who had twins at the age of 14. You can be a mom at any age & give them a better life then some grown women. I had my son at 19 & I'm trying to give him the best life like the way I was raised. I have full support from my family & I am a single mom.. The circumstances may be different but the comment was kinda rude she's asking for advice not someone to bash her for the choices she made.



Quoting Chelsey191:

I had my son at 24 not 13. I guess your stalking wasn't as thorough as it should be.






Quoting stressedmama24:

Okay u are in the young moms group as well so obviously u had kids at a young age too so take your own damb advice u hatefule bitch!








Quoting Chelsey191:

Advice is get some bc and better education on sex ed. Those babies deserve the best life at 16 can you really give them that?



Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
stressedmama24
by Member on Dec. 13, 2012 at 11:59 PM
It was a private school basically. In Albany GA. DARSEY PRIVATE SCHOOL. I heard they closed it last year tho bc Mr. Darsey passed away.


Quoting miranda_:

First I've heard of it. But okay. 


Quoting stressedmama24:

Where i live there is a "work at your own pace school" so if u work hard and.do well u can graduate.early. my sister and cousin botg went there bc they HATED their public school. They worked hard and fast. My sis graduatef at 16 and cousin at 15(the youngest to ever graduate from that school) it was expensive but worth it for them.





Quoting miranda_:

Lol, at least I make sense to someone. When I read that OP graduated at 16, I wasn't sure if she meant she got her GED , because I never heard of someone graduating at 16.



Quoting Nicki1995:

Exactly. I would have graduated at 17 also, but i got my GED at 16. I also got married at 16 and had my child at 16 lol I havent heard of anyone graduating at 16. I was in college classes in 11th grade before i dropped out to get my GED and they still wouldnt let me graduate early lol



Quoting miranda_:

As I said, I started school a year early. I was four when I got placed into Kindergarten. Even being placed into Kindergarten a year early, I still wasn't able to graduate until I was 17. She would of had to started kindergarten when she was 3.



Quoting erinmomofone:

If her birthday is late and she graduated a year earlier. Like I was 17 graduated right before my 18th birthday on my normal graduation date so it's possible.








Quoting miranda_:

How are you sixteen and you graduated already? I started school a year early and I still wasn't able to graduate until 17.











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Ciaodarlings
by on Dec. 14, 2012 at 12:11 AM
Depending on HOW young they are, they can't possibly (or successfully) raise a baby on their own without *any* kind of help. Especially if they're not even legally old enough to get a job. I don't care how "mature" they come across, honestly. They're still a child in some way, shape or form.

However, there are teenagers (on the semi-older/older spectrum) who do get pregnant and do better than most grown women. And to that, I tip my hat. I, myself, couldn't even imagine raising a child being that young but they make it happen.


Quoting stressedmama24:

Its sad tho bc some.YOUNGER.mothers are more.mature and level headed than some older mothers :-/ it all just depends on the person and their circumstances. Just bc someone is very young does not mean that they are immature.




Quoting Ciaodarlings:

Right. Makes sense. :-)





Quoting Teenmommy1119:

Oh I know. I'm just saying that not every mom in here is older since it is a young moms group.







Quoting Ciaodarlings:

I think what Chelsey was getting at is that it shouldn't be assumed that we ALL had kids as teenagers. Because we didn't. I'm 23 and pregnant with my first. But, by society's standards, I am young (but a young adult versus a teenager).









Quoting Teenmommy1119:

Sorry to jump in on this.. But you are in a YOUNG MOMS group. Which means your going to get women/girls in here at any age. But I know there's a girl on here who had twins at the age of 14. You can be a mom at any age & give them a better life then some grown women. I had my son at 19 & I'm trying to give him the best life like the way I was raised. I have full support from my family & I am a single mom.. The circumstances may be different but the comment was kinda rude she's asking for advice not someone to bash her for the choices she made.











Quoting Chelsey191:

I had my son at 24 not 13. I guess your stalking wasn't as thorough as it should be.














Quoting stressedmama24:

Okay u are in the young moms group as well so obviously u had kids at a young age too so take your own damb advice u hatefule bitch!
















Quoting Chelsey191:

Advice is get some bc and better education on sex ed. Those babies deserve the best life at 16 can you really give them that?



Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Chelsey191
by Member on Dec. 14, 2012 at 12:15 AM
I didn't say she couldn't do it, I said she needed to ask herself if she could. At the end of the day she is the only one who can answer that and by asking herself that, being honest with herself she can make the best decision for her and her babies. Knowing that will give her the confidence to do what she needs to do. Anyways I use it as a tool all the time to get me through tough spots, I thoroughly think it through I ask myself the questions most would ask others and I weigh the facts make my own conclusions and make my decision because at the end of the day its her choice to make and only hers. She needs to be confident in her decision especially if the people around her are trying to pressure her.



Quoting stressedmama24:

Idk maybe they.do.


..but just bc she is.very young doesnt.meam that.she cannot do well.for herself. If she works hard then she very well could make something of herself. She is just looking for encouragement. And i believe if she applys.herself then she can make a good decision for her and her children as far as what to do about this pregnancy. I had my first child at 18(got pregnant and married at 17). I worked hard to get where i am but it is thanks to having suppory and encouragement that i did it.





Quoting Chelsey191:

You posted like you thought you knew all about me. must be a stalker either that or really dumb and since you said you graduated I ruled that one out. Fyi, young moms is not the same as children becoming mothers. Though I wouldn't be surprised if they had a teen mom group on here.







Quoting stressedmama24:

Stalking? Wth hell.are u talking about u crazy nut?









Quoting Chelsey191:

I had my son at 24 not 13. I guess your stalking wasn't as thorough as it should be.











Quoting stressedmama24:

Okay u are in the young moms group as well so obviously u had kids at a young age too so take your own damb advice u hatefule bitch!













Quoting Chelsey191:

Advice is get some bc and better education on sex ed. Those babies deserve the best life at 16 can you really give them that?












Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
mama2my2boys
by on Dec. 14, 2012 at 12:17 AM
1 mom liked this
you know what, age dont matter as long as you can take care of your babie/babies! I have 3 kids me and dh both had decent paying jobs....he lost his & so did i....dh has a job now but it aint no where near what he had before we are struggling and im 28! shit happens its life we wernt planning are 3rd i was on the pill!!! so good luck keep your baby and carry on with life
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stressedmama24
by Member on Dec. 14, 2012 at 12:26 AM
I agree. What i meant was....in my case for example...i got a job under the table at a family friends resteraunt when i was 13. I worked after school,on weekends and on school breaks. I had to pay for what i wanted or needes such as school supplies or school clothes. I bought groceries. I did all the house work and cooking bc my mom was too drunk. I bought my own car at 15 and got my license when i turned 16. I paid for my own insurane and gas. I worked two jobs when i was 16/17 and went to school making all A's. At 17 i got with my dh and we got engaged pregnany and married senior year. In that order. I graduated and gave birth to dd1 two months after graduation. I went to work for Quiznos and became manager at 18 while pregnant with ds(i had him at 19) i continued managing while getting my degree in business management. I got pregnant with dd2 on my 20th bday. I am now 24(about to turn 25) and am pregnant with baby4. Im in the process of opening my own business.


It just depends on a persons drive and ambition on whether they pull themselves up by their bootstraps and do what needs to be done.


Quoting Ciaodarlings:

Depending on HOW young they are, they can't possibly (or successfully) raise a baby on their own without *any* kind of help. Especially if they're not even legally old enough to get a job. I don't care how "mature" they come across, honestly. They're still a child in some way, shape or form.



However, there are teenagers (on the semi-older/older spectrum) who do get pregnant and do better than most grown women. And to that, I tip my hat. I, myself, couldn't even imagine raising a child being that young but they make it happen.




Quoting stressedmama24:

Its sad tho bc some.YOUNGER.mothers are more.mature and level headed than some older mothers :-/ it all just depends on the person and their circumstances. Just bc someone is very young does not mean that they are immature.






Quoting Ciaodarlings:

Right. Makes sense. :-)







Quoting Teenmommy1119:

Oh I know. I'm just saying that not every mom in here is older since it is a young moms group.









Quoting Ciaodarlings:

I think what Chelsey was getting at is that it shouldn't be assumed that we ALL had kids as teenagers. Because we didn't. I'm 23 and pregnant with my first. But, by society's standards, I am young (but a young adult versus a teenager).











Quoting Teenmommy1119:

Sorry to jump in on this.. But you are in a YOUNG MOMS group. Which means your going to get women/girls in here at any age. But I know there's a girl on here who had twins at the age of 14. You can be a mom at any age & give them a better life then some grown women. I had my son at 19 & I'm trying to give him the best life like the way I was raised. I have full support from my family & I am a single mom.. The circumstances may be different but the comment was kinda rude she's asking for advice not someone to bash her for the choices she made.













Quoting Chelsey191:

I had my son at 24 not 13. I guess your stalking wasn't as thorough as it should be.
















Quoting stressedmama24:

Okay u are in the young moms group as well so obviously u had kids at a young age too so take your own damb advice u hatefule bitch!


















Quoting Chelsey191:

Advice is get some bc and better education on sex ed. Those babies deserve the best life at 16 can you really give them that?




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