Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I need advice! I'm a 16 year old girl who needs help deciding what to do. Please help me

Posted by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 10:25 PM
  • 36 Replies

I just recently found out I was pregnant and I am about 27 weeks and I'm under the pressure of making the decision to keep the baby or an open adoption. I don't think I'm the type of person to just give the baby up though. But I'm a junior in high school and have my whole life ahead of me. Any advice that would help me make my decision? 

by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 10:25 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
tre412
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 10:35 PM
2 moms liked this
People will tell you that you're life is over because you'll have a baby, but that's not true.
It doesn't seem like you really want adoption. It's something you have to be sure about. My brother gave 2 kids up for adoption (open and then a semi-open). It's hard to do, but a wonderful gift to give to someone.

Make a pro/con list and see where that leads you.
ProudMommaBear
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 10:36 PM
1 mom liked this

hey hun, I'm 16 and got pregnant at 15 .  I decided to keep my daughter, shes 6months old now and I just finished my junior year through online school.  I will be returning to my public school to do my senior year and graduate with my peers.  message me with any questions :) i considered adoption as well

newmommy2131
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 10:47 PM

Adoption isn't anyone's decision but yours, because in the end your the one that has to live with that decision. Keeping a baby and taking care of it yourself isn't going to be easy. You have to think about how your going to feel when the baby comes, after you have carried your baby 9 months, felt kicks, hiccups, and seen it's little face in the sonograms. Are you really going to be able to give that baby away. Also, think about what's best for the baby. Only you really know your situation. If there's a will there's away. As long you love your baby and put that baby first in making your decision. Everything will be fine. Good Luck!

cemcnair
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 11:02 PM
2 moms liked this
Bottom line:
Can you care for this child or do you have support to help you care for this child?
If yes, great! Keep the baby.
If not, please consider adoption for both your sakes.
Hugs! I hope whatever you choose you are at peace :)
CheyMom16
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 11:36 PM
1 mom liked this

Hey I am a junior and highschool also and i am 31 weeks pregnant. It is your decision by law on what you do with your kid. Trust me i was pressured into the same thing. I decided to keep my kid. If i was to give my baby up for adoption it would stay in the family. It is your decision though! once you see your little ones face you wont want to give it up. If you need any other advice feel free to message me!

KylersMom8-16-7
by Platinum Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 11:53 PM
That's tough but you must make a decision you can live with. Open adoption is wonderful but it's not guaranteed, the family could close the adoption at anytime.

I had my first at 17. My mom supported me, emotionally and financially. I have never regretted my decision to keep my son. I got pregnant when he was 8 months and I applied for cash assistance because I was 18. I saved money and supported my kids until I moved out with my boyfriend who supports us.

We are 23 now. Our sons are 5, 4, and 21 months. I'm also 10.1 weeks with #4. I don't regret my choices. My kids are wonderful and challenging. Yes it's hard but it's truly the best thing you'll ever do.

Think long and hard about it and I hope you can make the right decision for you. Good luck!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Mrs_Nelson
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 11:59 PM
3 moms liked this
I was a young mom (i am 34 now and my oldest child is 16). I thought about adoption but kept my son it isn't easy but for me it was the right choice. You do not have to decide between being a mother and having a future. If you keep the baby you will have to give up some things like parties and spending money on random teenaged crap like kids do. You will have much more responsibility then your friends and some of them will walk away from you. There will be nasty people (mainly adults) who will try to tear you down for being a young mom. It is exhausting and often thankless in many ways. But you will get to see that sunny little smile in the morning when they first wake up and see you. You will get to smell that fresh from the bath baby smell and feel them snuggle a little closer when they are tired because in mommy's arms I'd their favorite place to be. You will have to work harder to finish school but your little one will be there watching you walk across that stage clapping their chubby little hands and yelling " mommy" for all they are worth. If you want to go to college then you can but it might take a but longer than the average 4 years (for me it took 6) but your kid will have the benefit of seeing first hand his important college is and once again they will be there cheering you on when you cross the stage.

I have had hard times but never any bad ones because I always kept my head up and remembered that I already had a great prize in life... My son. I don't know about adoptions because I didn't go that the route but I just wanted to give you some real insight into the good the bad and the awesome that can happen when you do keep the baby. It doesn't have to be an ending, just a different path to the same destination. I now have three awesome boys, a wonderful hubby and a really cool job with an international media company. Not too shabby for the girl who "ruined" her life by getting pregnant in high school. Whatever you decide do it because it is right for you.
sunshine86912
by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 9:52 AM

 you got some god advice here.....I didnt have this problem..I was 19..but knew I could never give my child up for adoption.  on the other hand, a friend who was a year older than me who got pregnant right before I did..she gave her baby up..was the best choice she prolly ever made for that baby...she just wasnt ready to grow up and act the part of a  mom.  she wanted to party..and live it up with people her age with out having to worry about a child.  it seems to have worked out well for her..a few years ago she settled down and got married and had another baby...so you have your own choice to make..and if adoption is in your mind..I would suggest looking into it more..and the whole life ahead of me..you will still have your whole life ahead of you..just might not go the way you had planned

SabrinaLC
by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 10:46 AM

This!

Quoting cemcnair:

Bottom line:
Can you care for this child or do you have support to help you care for this child?
If yes, great! Keep the baby.
If not, please consider adoption for both your sakes.
Hugs! I hope whatever you choose you are at peace :)


***Sabrina *~* wife to Matt  8/6/05*~*Mommy to Isaac 7/25/06, *~*Liam 7/30/08, *~* and Eban 6/24/10***

Nicki1995
by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 10:52 AM
I had my daughter when i was 16 after being married for 7 months. We kept her and are doing just fine
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)