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5 Mom Friends to Avoid if You Want to Stay Sane

Posted by on Dec. 18, 2013 at 11:56 AM
  • 3 Replies

5 Mom Friends to Avoid if You Want to Stay Sane

by Ericka Sóuter

giseleIt seems Gisele Bundchen is rivaling Gwyneth Paltrow for most annoying celeb mom. First the supermodel made headlines with her breastfeeding stance: "I think there should be a worldwide law in my opinion that mothers should breastfeed their babies for six months."

Her take on baby weight: "I think a lot of people get pregnant and decide they can turn into garbage disposals. I was mindful about what I ate and I gained only 30 pounds." Oh ... and what's the big deal about delivery? "It wasn't painful, not even a little bit ... the second day I was walking, I was washing dishes, I was making pancakes in the kitchen." Then, last week she posted a photo breastfeeding while getting pampered by her Glam Squad.

Rolling your eyes yet? Just wait. The latest? An Instagram pic of a bikini-clad Gisele doing yoga on the beach with her little boy. Some people are saying this is more of her mommy bragging.

But if you are annoyed with this supermom and her perfect life, it's not her fault, it's yours. Why? Because you choose to look at her perfect mommy moments and fume. I say for the sake of your sanity, ignore her and every other sanctimonious mom. Here are the five types that you should definitely avoid.

  1. The Hottie Mom. As if defying physics and logic, she is even hotter after birth, with her now full boobs and magically tiny again waist. Nothing will make you feel more frumpy and fat than that mom friend who is in her skinny jeans 24 hours after giving birth.
  2. The Uber Boober. It's like she's taken it upon herself to be the worldwide rep for breastfeeding. She doesn't just do it, she thinks every mom should must do it too ... and for at least six months to a year. If you don't, she has no problem launching into a diatribe about how you are hurting your baby.
  3. The Brady Bunch Wannabe. Is this woman trying to populate the elementary school on her own or what? Going to her house even for an hour will make you rue the thought of having more.
  4. The Germaphobe. I remember a neighbor used to make her nanny get on her hands and knees each night and clean every rug and floorboard with a Clorox Wipe. This in a house that had a no-shoes policy. Her place was more sterile than my delivery room. When I noticed I was picking up her paranoia, I had to distance myself. It's craziness.
  5. The Winner. Everything is a competition with this mom. Your child walked at 10 months, hers at 9 months and 3 weeks. Her kid knew their ABCs before anyone else, ate solids first, and don't get her started on his artwork. A Van Gogh in the making, of course. If this is your mommy BFF, your face will be set on permanent eye-roll.

What other moms should you avoid?

by on Dec. 18, 2013 at 11:56 AM
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Replies (1-3):
yellow14
by Member on Dec. 18, 2013 at 6:02 PM
Oh those mothers make me angry

Quoting Cafe AmyS:

5 Mom Friends to Avoid if You Want to Stay Sane

by Ericka
Sóuter



giseleIt
seems Gisele Bundchen is rivaling Gwyneth
Paltrow
for most annoying celeb mom. First the
supermodel made headlines with her breastfeeding stance: "I think there should
be a worldwide law in my opinion that mothers should breastfeed their babies for
six months."


Her take on baby weight: "I think a lot of people get pregnant and decide
they can turn into garbage disposals. I was mindful about what I ate and I
gained only 30 pounds." Oh ... and what's the big deal about delivery? "It
wasn't painful, not even a little bit ... the second day I was walking, I was
washing dishes, I was making pancakes in the kitchen." Then, last week she
posted a photo breastfeeding while getting pampered by her Glam Squad.


Rolling your eyes yet? Just wait. The latest? An Instagram pic of a
bikini-clad Gisele doing yoga on the beach with her little boy.
Some people are saying this is more of her mommy bragging.


But if you are annoyed with this supermom and her perfect life, it's not her
fault, it's yours. Why? Because you choose to look at her perfect mommy
moments and fume. I say for the sake of your sanity, ignore her and every
other sanctimonious mom. Here are the five types that you should definitely
avoid.



  1. The Hottie Mom. As if defying physics and logic, she
    is even hotter after birth, with her now full boobs and magically tiny again
    waist. Nothing will make you feel more frumpy and fat than that mom friend who
    is in her skinny jeans 24 hours after giving birth.

  2. The Uber Boober. It's like she's taken it upon herself to
    be the worldwide rep for breastfeeding. She doesn't just do it, she thinks every
    mom should must do it too ...
    and for at least six months to a year. If you don't, she has no problem
    launching into a diatribe about how you are hurting your baby.

  3. The Brady Bunch Wannabe. Is this woman trying to populate
    the elementary school on her own or what? Going to her house even for an hour
    will make you rue the thought of having more.

  4. The Germaphobe. I remember a
    neighbor used to make her nanny get on her hands and knees each night and clean
    every rug and floorboard with a Clorox Wipe. This in a house that had a no-shoes
    policy. Her place was more sterile than my delivery room. When I noticed I was
    picking up her paranoia, I had to distance myself. It's craziness.

  5. The Winner. Everything is a competition with this
    mom. Your child walked at 10 months, hers at 9 months and 3 weeks. Her kid knew
    their ABCs before anyone else, ate solids first, and don't get her started on
    his artwork. A Van Gogh in the making, of course. If this is your
    mommy BFF, your face will be set on permanent
    eye-roll.

What other moms should you avoid?

kit_manson
by Member on Dec. 18, 2013 at 6:09 PM

Eh, I don't care if someone has a thousand kids, as long as they're polite and well behaved.

The ones that bother me, are the ones who talk about an issue they've never faced and say "I would NEVER allow that!!!" without stopping to think that maybe the child isn't allowed either, and that kids aren't all the same. 

Benswifey10710
by Amanda on Dec. 18, 2013 at 7:59 PM
Lol
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