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is it "unacceptable"???

Posted by on Jan. 27, 2009 at 5:55 PM
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Hi ladies,
I have a question, hoping for advice and no judgement. Do you ladies think that it is inappropriate for someone to try to conceive while on state funding?? (food stamps or medical card, etc.) It might sound like a strange question, but I guess my concern is that I don't want people thinking I am trying to "take advantage of the system" by having another child on PURPOSE while I have medical insurance through the state. I have a son that is almost 1 1/2, and by the time he is 2 or 2 1/2 I would like to be pregnant. I don't forsee myself having gotten a job that would give me insurance and also be able to afford daycare and all that fun stuff. I currently work as a waitress and my hours are tailored to fit my family's and boyfriend's schedule to watch our son. Sorry if this is all over the place, I guess I just need some advice...if you think I should have a more stable job, or try to get off state aid, before we try to have another baby....Thanks in advance!!
by on Jan. 27, 2009 at 5:55 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Member on Jan. 27, 2009 at 5:58 PM

It shouldn't matter to you what our opinion is.If you want to do it,do it.

by Member on Jan. 27, 2009 at 6:04 PM

no i do not, if you were having one just so you could KEEP assistence that would be wrong. i would still continue looking for a better job and what not but no i do not think it is wrong.

by New Member on Jan. 27, 2009 at 6:06 PM

 I am on state cash and food stamp benefits and medical.  I have a 9 month old son and I am preggo again.  Ofcourse it was unplanned and an accident because my I had a problem with medical assistance for 2 months.   I don't know myself if I would actually 'try' to have a baby while i wasn't financially stable.  Both of my pregnancies have been unplanned and I am a single mom so it will be a hard road ahead for me to give the best to my children.  Good Luck to you in whatever you decide.

by Member on Jan. 27, 2009 at 6:07 PM

I don't think it's unacceptable at all. With the economy the way it is, you may be waiting a LONG time before you become more stable. Just do what you want to do. Who cares if you have state insurance. Lots of people in Ma where I am have it because they passed a law that everyone has to have insurance or pay a penalty when they file taxes.

by Member on Jan. 27, 2009 at 10:27 PM

I would do so... I mean it is not the best thing to say but To have a child with out any benitfs is really hard... I know one of my good friends had their boy and was just making over the limits and are still paying him off and he is 5 now

by on Jan. 29, 2009 at 1:54 PM

I would do the same thing too.  I agree, this economy stinks and you might have to wait until your child is in highschool to start having kids again if you wait until you're stable.  I don't think there's anything wrong with TTC on benefits, even though people who've never had to be on benefits will judge, they don't know what they would do unless they were in our position.


by Member on Jan. 29, 2009 at 4:53 PM

I think it is wrong when people have a bunch of kids just to take advantage of the system but you are wnating a child because you would like to have more than 1 and in our ecomic situation no one has time to just wait until they have the perfect job a bunch of money a big house all that jazz, and insurence is way too expenisive not many can afford to not have state funded kind!! the people that sicken me are the ones i see at all the gov. offices with thier 10children who are all about 3yrs apart thats how you can tell they did it to keep all their state funded money and take advantage!!

Good Luck with the baby abd baby making!!

by Member on Jan. 30, 2009 at 3:04 PM

It is a part of life.  It is fine. 

by New Member on Jan. 30, 2009 at 7:22 PM

I totally agree with you.  This also bugs me :P (the whole comment about the people with 10 kids so they won't lose assistance)

As for the above question.  No its not wrong.  I agree with everyone here that if we all waited for our lives to be "stable" then this world would be lacking children all around.

My fiencee and I started trying after I graduated from college with my associates degree despite him being the only one working.  I then found a job and then found out about my lil Alice Rose (Due May 30 09) and then I just got laid off my job. 

Times are tough.  Do what your heart says to do...thats always the best way to go

by on Jan. 30, 2009 at 7:40 PM

I dont think it is wrong, you are working so it isnt like you are staying home doing nothing but producing children. As others stated- the economy stinks and you have at least one of the few industries that maybe stable because everyone needs to eat... Do what you feel is best for your family and who cares what others think.

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