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Finally... (long)

Posted by on Apr. 23, 2008 at 1:11 PM
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So ever since my now husband and I were engaged I noticed a kind of drinking problem with his mother... My MIL drinks like a bottle of wine by herself after work... or if there is a family event or whatever... she finds reasons to drink... thats not good... I mean at my baby shower the woman got soooo trashed on champagne... it really bothered me b/c I mean call me selfish but that was MY babyshower I'm the one becoming a mother... my nurses at the hospital when I had my son get very angry with her because she thought my husband and I having our son was more about her than us... what I mean is there are pictures of her with my son and her boyfriend with my son and her parents with my son and I think one of my husband with our son but... there is not one of me with my son... I am really a wimp and cant confront the woman so I mean the entire time we were at the hopsital... she help conner more than I did... my mother finally got a picture of me conner and my DH at the hospital... but I mean my MIL is so selfish and I sont know what to do.... she still acts as if Conner is her son... Now she has broken up with her boyfriend and not even two days later she is on a website trying to find another guy... my husband grew up around all of this because he dad is a deadbeat... but I finally voiced my concerns to my husband... a big step for me and he talked to his mother... she said about the alcohol that well I dont see the problem but I guess I will work on it... and her response about the boyfriend thing was something like there is really nothing we can do about it because we need her to watch the baby because we both have to work and cant afford daycare or anything like that and she only workd 3 days a week so she takes care  of him...

I dunno I guess I am just venting.. but I mean it worries me and it's like my husband is soooo laid back that it doesnt seem to phase him so it really meant alot to me that he actually talked to her about stuff... it's hard for him beccause I guess she has always been like this and so he grew up around it...
by on Apr. 23, 2008 at 1:11 PM
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3boym
by Group Admin on Apr. 23, 2008 at 6:34 PM
Sounds like you've got a keeper-- your man that is !

It sounds like he's got the perfect balance of laid back enough to deal with his Mom and strong enough to support you when there are genuine safety issues!

And you are a wise one to speak up to him, and let him deal with her!

I wonder if it helps to see providing flattery to her as your "payment" for her daycare service-- that is really a generous thing to do, even if she's not doing it so graciously.

Also, be sure to have time with your man so its clear when its just you two that you're #1!
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