still am waiting......

[Precious333]

Well, I still have been listening to God and trying to rest and wait on HIM,
especially when it comes to school for DAmien. So far what I have been hearing
from God are these verses and overall messages that keep coming back to me. I
have no confirmation from God on how He is at work through all of this, but I
here is what I have been hearing so far. One is James 1:2-9 . 2 My brethren,
count it all joy when you fall into various trials, 3 knowing that the testing
of your faith produces patience. 4 But let patience have its perfect work, that
you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom,
let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will
be given to him. 6 But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts
is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. 7 For let not that man
suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; 8 he is a double-minded
man, unstable in all his ways. Several people have given me this verse as well
as other sermons I have been lisrening to. I think God is working on my faith,
something I struggle with greatly!

Another one that keeps coming back is Psalm 31, especially vs. 2 " Surely I have
calmed and quieted my soul, Like a weaned child with his mother; Like a weaned
child is my soul within me". I still am having trouble umderstanding the weaned
child part. For me I think that God wants us to cling to him, and see a nursing
child being like this, and I think of a nursing child being calmed and quieted.
So, I am stumbling over this one. However I do understand that I am to humbly
trust the LORD and be stilled and quieted because HE is omniscient.

I heard a friend lead us in devotions on wednesday. She talked about living day
by day and not worrying about whats ahead of us. A great illustration is the
road we are walking now, we need to keep focus on whats in front of us, and not
worry about the huge mountain ahead. If we don't pay attention to whats in front
of us we may stumble over a small rock, and who knows where God may lead us,
maybe he's not leading us to the HUGE mountain, or if He is, then we can trust
that He will equip us for the road!

So, here I am thinking about what we are doing next year. Should I do Classical
conversations with Gavin and tutor? Should I put Damien's name in the lottery
for Aveson Charter School. Should I look into Odyessy Cherter school? Should I
just allow him to go to Monroe elementary, the school I swore my kids would not
step foot in? Should I put him in the spanish speaking class? What grade should
he be in next year? Aveson atleast education seems better, seems like a better
match for Damien, but its so secular! I was told there are homosexual parents
that send their kids there. Plus, its a drive, but atleast they have half days
on mondays. Monroe's curriculum is not very good, they neglect art and music,
and there are no science activities. Their curriculum consists of workbooks.
They have a spanish class so that children can become bilingual from a young
age. There is no flexibility, field trips etc.

Another thing is I want Damien to be involved in his interests. Like karate, or
gymnastics or a sport. Then I heard on the radio from a mom who homeschools her
daughters. She mentioned how her priority is first teaching her girls about God,
and second building intimate relationships with them. She has said "no" to many
activities because it takes away from the family. So, now I am convicted that I
will not be taking any additional time from the home if Damien has to go to
school, which saddens me because he will miss out on these special activities
and ways of helping him develop his interests.
Anyways, there are some of my thoughts.