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What do you think?

Posted by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 5:04 AM
  • 10 Replies

DDs Godmother is white and her Godfather is black (they have been togethee 18 years). They are an older couple she 61 and he's 53.

She moved in when I was about 5 months pregnant (rooming housei). She is excellent with my daughter. Loves her like a grandbaby. Even has her as her beneficiary on her insurance.

My problem is that she likes to throw around the word "nigger" a lot. It offends everyone around except her husband. I think through the years he learned to brush it off. Some back story: She was raped by a black man and her husband (not this one. She had another husband) found out and beat her senseless. She lost their baby and had to get a hysterectomy. She was 19. So I think she still holds some resentment.

I don't like it but never say anything because I don't want her to get defensive and nasty (she has a tendency to ne very nasty sometimes). So what would you do??

♥♥♥Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your HEART♥♥♥

♥♥♥Brielle: My heart, soul and existence! God's Gift! Mommy's Angel♥♥♥

by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 5:04 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Sakurachiba
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 5:09 AM
2 moms liked this
Ask her to stop it and be firm about it. She shouldn't do that especially if youre offended. And I don't think you should feel obligated to be ok with.
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Delila12
by Silver Member on Dec. 3, 2011 at 7:04 AM
Tell her to stop around me and my child. And if she gets nasty, get nasty back. I wouldn't put my child around that type of person.
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becauseoflove
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 7:08 AM
Bump
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V.Dubbya
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 7:10 AM
Tho I appreciate what she's been thru, the term is offensive to you and she's in your home. I'd ask her not to use it around you and yours and leave it at that. And as the pp said you're not required to accept or allow it.
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3xangel
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 7:14 AM


Quoting Sakurachiba:

Ask her to stop it and be firm about it. She shouldn't do that especially if youre offended. And I don't think you should feel obligated to be ok with.
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herM0MMYhisWIFE
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 8:09 AM
I agree ... I would just explain to her that I would never want my daughter to hear you say that , so is there a way WE can work on it together .. My aunt is getting older and people get so set in their ways they don't notice the things they say or do .. She's real snappy and demanding and she recently lost her partner of 24 Years .. She has a great bond with my daughter .. So I usually make things about them ..
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DOMTITI
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 8:43 AM
1 mom liked this

I wouldnt give a damn if she got "nasty and defensive". She is being offensive and nasty using that god forsaken word. I would confront her about the word, tell her to stop using it around me and my child or I wouldnt be around her. I dont tolerate the use of that word from black people. I dismiss myself. I also find it hyporcitical for those who CLAIM TO BE SO "PRO-BLACK" that throw the word around. They are a joke to me.. How can you be so for black enpowerment, yet use a word that is demeaning against your own..SOME BS.

Tish_Hughes
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 9:18 AM
I don't like it
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gwenilicious
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 9:19 AM
You would think that if she felt that way about black people after being raped then she wouldn't be around them now! Anyway people that use that word say it to hurt you! I would tell her point blank don't use that word no more!
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Bunsmommy
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 10:17 AM
1 mom liked this
Exactly! Also, I presume your daughter has some type of black blood in her, would you want this woman to act foolish and call her a nigger? I can understand her pain that she never dealt with or figured out how to move beyond; however, the world did not cause her that injustice. One ignorant black man did and just bc she may feel he is/was a nigger does not make all blacks niggers. It's ugly and hateful and if you don't speak up you accept it.

Quoting DOMTITI:

I wouldnt give a damn if she got "nasty and defensive". She is being offensive and nasty using that god forsaken word. I would confront her about the word, tell her to stop using it around me and my child or I wouldnt be around her. I dont tolerate the use of that word from black people. I dismiss myself. I also find it hyporcitical for those who CLAIM TO BE SO "PRO-BLACK" that throw the word around. They are a joke to me.. How can you be so for black enpowerment, yet use a word that is demeaning against your own..SOME BS.

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