First off, are there any Military Wives in here? And even if you're not, you can still chime in. Ok so recently I hung out with a group of young ladies, all of our husbands are military and work together. We had a nice time, but some of the wives started to talk about other wives who were not there. I didn't care, because it wasnt my name coming out of their mouths. I've since become really cool with one young lady, and she has given me the "low down" on all of them. She has confided in me, because she says I am the only one that she can talk to and trust that her business is not going to get tossed around. I am a very loyal person, and I don't run my mouth. I stay out of the drama and cattiness. Mind you, I am the only AA wife amongst a lot of Caucasian wives. It is very hard to find AA wives, especially wives who's husbands work in my hubby's unit. I find it so interesting how these women can smile in each others face and stab each other in the back. I stay away from the drama, and only give an unbiased opinion. Not all military wives are this way, I have befriended some in the past that were amazing women, and they were of all races. But since then, the Military has taken us all in different direction. I start school next month and am looking forward to meeting new, like minded people. I know that there will always be drama, but that doesn't mean I have to be involved. What do you all think? Even if you're not a Military wife, how do you handle the drama with other female friends/ associates?
honestly? I keep to myself...and it sounds like you're a little bit more outgoing than I am. And even when I did step out of my lil cacoon, it was for my daughter to have someone to play with, and i was blessed enough to chill with girls that were about like me.
but in the past when I have dealt with childishness and high school-minded people, I distanced myself. chances are, (chances...not a sure thing) but i would be thinking, while this lady has her smile in my face, telling me I'm the only one she can trust, telling me alllllll about everybody else, she is probably going back to report info. so you said you're pretty unbiased and quiet about the drama, so i suggest you sit back and look and observe how they treat eachother. i wouldn't be so eager to believe i was different from everyone who has been betrayed, you know? maybe there is somoene outside of his unit? i'd just be careful. don't get all wrapped up in silly stuff for the sake of acquaintances.
then again...most of the time this happens in groups. even guys do it. gossip is sometimes not malicious but...be careful when it gets ugly
good luck!
Very true. I agree that there's drama everywhere that you go. We are stationed at Fort Campbell, KY.
Quoting MyJaidon:
There's catty women everywhere. Im a wife too but all my friends here are women I used to work with and they are still active duty. I haven't really found any other wives I can relate to enough to really hang out with. I don't participate in the FRG but maybe I should. But any group of women there's always one or two that are a little messy. Military wives or not. Where are you and DH stationed? We are in FT Drum (brrrrr).
To be honest, I just started associating with these females. I've always been to myself. In the past I befriended some amazing women, but the military has taken us in different directions. We still keep in contact. I guess I am just trying to step outside of the box, let my daughter play with other kids and have some mommy time you know. I don't discuss ANY of my personal business, I keep it very general. I know a couple of wives that are outside of the unit, but we don't really keep in touch, maybe I should reach out to them. If I don't hang out with these ladies, I am just fine.
Quoting leftylefty:honestly? I keep to myself...and it sounds like you're a little bit more outgoing than I am. And even when I did step out of my lil cacoon, it was for my daughter to have someone to play with, and i was blessed enough to chill with girls that were about like me.
but in the past when I have dealt with childishness and high school-minded people, I distanced myself. chances are, (chances...not a sure thing) but i would be thinking, while this lady has her smile in my face, telling me I'm the only one she can trust, telling me alllllll about everybody else, she is probably going back to report info. so you said you're pretty unbiased and quiet about the drama, so i suggest you sit back and look and observe how they treat eachother. i wouldn't be so eager to believe i was different from everyone who has been betrayed, you know? maybe there is somoene outside of his unit? i'd just be careful. don't get all wrapped up in silly stuff for the sake of acquaintances.
then again...most of the time this happens in groups. even guys do it. gossip is sometimes not malicious but...be careful when it gets ugly
good luck!
The one who gave you all the dirt on the other ladies saying that your the only one she can talk to and trust....WATCH that one, she doesn't know you from a can of paint but yet she trust you. Trust & Believe she will tell all your dirt too, she's trying to bait you in right now
oh okay...that's exactly why I tried to step outside the box. if it's meant to be, someone will show themselves to be more than obsessed with drama, and hopefully you'll have atleast ONE person who is real.
i'll take one real over a group of just...ugh...anyday.
Exactly. I'd rather have a couple of real friends, instead of a gang of fake ones. I'm just blessed that I have true friends back in my home town and an amazing husband, so I'm not stressing it one bit!
Quoting leftylefty:oh okay...that's exactly why I tried to step outside the box. if it's meant to be, someone will show themselves to be more than obsessed with drama, and hopefully you'll have atleast ONE person who is real.
i'll take one real over a group of just...ugh...anyday.
Military spouse here! I hate cattiness of women! I seen it a lot of my years! I find it more common from women that are younger&who's husband don't have many stripes on their arms(not saying all). I also been around the spouses who "wear" their husbands stripes. Sit down somewhere,you are not the military member! Ugh that mess gets on my nerves! LOL In civilian world&military world I tend to stay away from people who don't share my values&you have nothing better to do than to put others down! I hate that some AF wives putting down Army. They act so high class! I maybe a AF wife but I'm an army brat!
And how to handle it just keep pushing,try not to get to engrossed into gossipping. I know you said you don't repeat or divulge,but sometimes just being close to it,is bad enough!
Quoting supermom664:The one who gave you all the dirt on the other ladies saying that your the only one she can talk to and trust....WATCH that one, she doesn't know you from a can of paint but yet she trust you. Trust & Believe she will tell all your dirt too, she's trying to bait you in right now
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