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Is it ok, that I'm ok?

Posted by on May. 8, 2012 at 9:59 AM
  • 12 Replies

For the last few weeks this has been on my mind. Me and my kids father have been together for 6 years. We are youn, but thats how long we have been a couple. Im 21 and he is 24. We have a 3 year old daughter and Im pregnant with our son. We live together. Have been for last 3 years and right now are in the process of moving to a bigger home. I am in cosmo school right now, and he is attending college. So our lives are busy. My questions is, Is it ok, that Im ok with the fact that he hasnt proposed to me? I do wear a ring on my right ring finger that he gaveme two years ago for valentines day as a promise ring. But that doesnt really matter to me. I may only be thinking about this so hard because since my baby is due in 8 weeks, everyone around me has been asking me are we getting married. And i can only say i dont know. So now what?

by on May. 8, 2012 at 9:59 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Bunsmommy
by Ruby Member on May. 8, 2012 at 10:09 AM
Do you want to get married? If yes, then you need to sit him down and have that conversation. If no, then do not allow others to pressure you and when you're both ready then you do it.
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KJones413
by on May. 8, 2012 at 10:12 AM

I think that i would like to be married, and im starting to feel like that if its gonna happen, then why are we still waiting. But at the same time, I dont even know what to say in that sit down convo.

Quoting Bunsmommy:

Do you want to get married? If yes, then you need to sit him down and have that conversation. If no, then do not allow others to pressure you and when you're both ready then you do it.


iluvdwc
by Gold Member on May. 8, 2012 at 10:22 AM
3 moms liked this
If you are ok with it, then yes it's ok. When you're ready for anything in a relationship, you have to speak up and communicate that to your partner. If your relationship is working for y'all, then don't make an issue that isn't there.
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mspecan_tan
by Silver Member on May. 8, 2012 at 10:25 AM
2 moms liked this

 Try starting off with ..."are we ever getting married?" ... "do you want to get married?" ... then express to him how you feel about marriage.

Quoting KJones413:

I think that i would like to be married, and im starting to feel like that if its gonna happen, then why are we still waiting. But at the same time, I dont even know what to say in that sit down convo.

Quoting Bunsmommy:

Do you want to get married? If yes, then you need to sit him down and have that conversation. If no, then do not allow others to pressure you and when you're both ready then you do it.


 

Captzsss
by Silver Member on May. 8, 2012 at 10:26 AM

This

Quoting Bunsmommy:

Do you want to get married? If yes, then you need to sit him down and have that conversation. If no, then do not allow others to pressure you and when you're both ready then you do it.


Bunsmommy
by Ruby Member on May. 8, 2012 at 10:30 AM
2 moms liked this
You could even start off with bringing up your promise ring. If you want to be married then you need to initiate the discussion. He may be feeling as if you are complacent w/the situation, when truthfully you're not.

Quoting mspecan_tan:

 Try starting off with ..."are we ever getting married?" ... "do you want to get married?" ... then express to him how you feel about marriage.


Quoting KJones413:


I think that i would like to be married, and im starting to feel like that if its gonna happen, then why are we still waiting. But at the same time, I dont even know what to say in that sit down convo.


Quoting Bunsmommy:

Do you want to get married? If yes, then you need to sit him down and have that conversation. If no, then do not allow others to pressure you and when you're both ready then you do it.



 

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GoddessNDaRuff
by on May. 8, 2012 at 11:19 AM
1 mom liked this

I think it's fine you're ok. There's no rush imo. The ring, the marriage license, the wedding, those things won't make him anymore committed to you than what he wants to be. And it sounds like he's pretty damn committed. I say let it go and let it flow unless it's something that is bothering you. Forget other folks and their questions. Only the two of you are in the relationship. If your comfortable just tell them you are comfortable and when/if marriage happens you'll embrace it but for now your not too much worried about it.

KJones413
by on May. 8, 2012 at 11:26 AM

I believe he is trying to do whats best for all of us and marriage right now would be a plus but i think that when he is ready he will make the big step, a if he nevr does and we split then that would be better than rushing it now and we split ayway. 

CoolRelax
by Silver Member on May. 8, 2012 at 11:30 AM

If you're ok with it that's all that really matters.  Personally I would be terrified to do all that and not have at least an engagement ring though.  At this point it sounds kinda like you're not that ok with it.  Time to just ask him what's up. 

Diva-Mami
by Silver Member on May. 8, 2012 at 11:46 AM
2 moms liked this
If it aint broke dont fix it. If it works for you dont worry about anyone else.
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