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Dear Zane.... (smh)

Posted by on May. 9, 2012 at 10:18 AM
  • 17 Replies

Hi Zane,
I really need some outside advice. I am pregnant with 2 possible fathers but the possibility of 2 fathers is not the issue, the real issue is that one of the possibles are GAY/BI point blank likes men. Now when we had sex to me it was just sexual nothing more nothing less...then I ended up pregnant. The problem here is that I don't want him in my childs life if he is the father. He really wants to be. I have told him he may or may not be the father but he is determined to be involved. I have went as far as telling him I had an abortion but ended up running into him several weeks ago. Since then he's came to my house trying to talk. I don't want to be rude to him so I let him know that I would like to go through with my pregnancy alone. He told me to promise him that id call him when I'm in labor but I told him straight up I can't make that promise to him. id rather be a single mother then to have to deal with the fact I have a child from a gay man. I know I shouldn't keep him away but I can't help it. I know people first of all wouldn't have put themselves in my shoes but if you/they were what would you do? Deal with the fact or raise your child solo. I mean maybe down the line I might contact him but right now I can't bring myself to do it. Please help.

by on May. 9, 2012 at 10:18 AM
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Replies (1-10):
krisdev67
by on May. 9, 2012 at 10:31 AM
1 mom liked this

 This is some crazy mess.  She has sex with a man that's gay/bisexual and ends up pregnant and doesn't want him to be an active parent if he's the father?  Ok, well she's never said if she found this information out before they had sex or after so I'm assuming that she knew all along.  So then why go through all this mess and drama.  Does she realize that that child has a right to know who it's father is?  Does she realize that she ought to be grateful that he wants to be an active part of this child's life?  What she needs to be doing is allowing him and the possible other father to be involved in the pregnancy if they chose to be and get that DNA test. Once she knows who is the father allow that man to help parent that child.  She laid down with him why be embarrassed now?

bxbsmommy
by on May. 9, 2012 at 10:32 AM
She wasn't worried about him being gay/bi when she laid down with him, so why keep him from his child?
GoddessNDaRuff
by on May. 9, 2012 at 10:37 AM

I'm still stuck on she slept with a gay man or bisexual either way no way in fuck I would knowinly do that and might have a snapped moment if he told me after the fact.

As for him being the father......she slept with at least he's stepping up. She doesn't want to be around him while pregnant or want him there when she has the baby, fine. But when she gets home from the hospital, at the latest,  she needs to call him up and let him know his child was born and let him be involved.

SMH

CoolRelax
by Silver Member on May. 9, 2012 at 10:37 AM

Hopefully ole boy will be right there when the baby is born to assert his parental rights.  I'd have the child tested then take her to court for custody/visitation.  He's going to need a lawyer.  This chick is good and crazy.

"So, basically I had unprotected sex with a bi-sexual man along with unprotected sex with some other dude, I don't know which is the father, but if it's the bisexual dude I plan on boxing him out of my child's life."  <<----- Extra Crispy Crazy. 

krisdev67
by on May. 9, 2012 at 10:45 AM

 I have to say that I noticed that she never said one way or the other how the other man acted when she told him.

GoddessNDaRuff
by on May. 9, 2012 at 10:50 AM


Quoting krisdev67:

 I have to say that I noticed that she never said one way or the other how the other man acted when she told him.

People on FB pointed that out too. But to tell you the truth I have a feeling she knows the baby belongs to the man she wrote about. I think she is claiming it might be the other guy's as well trying to give herself an out. Or least she wouldn't be going so such lengths. I mean she told the guy she had an abortion until he ran into her and saw her stomach poking out.

krisdev67
by on May. 9, 2012 at 10:51 AM

 Wow all I can do is smh! 

Quoting GoddessNDaRuff:


Quoting krisdev67:

 I have to say that I noticed that she never said one way or the other how the other man acted when she told him.

People on FB pointed that out too. But to tell you the truth I have a feeling she knows the baby belongs to the man she wrote about. I think she is claiming it might be the other guy's as well trying to give herself an out. Or least she wouldn't be going so such lengths. I mean she told the guy she had an abortion until he ran into her and saw her stomach poking out.

 

queensweet
by on May. 9, 2012 at 11:05 AM

Original or spicey? lolll. 

I am just so thankful to God that I have never had to deal with circumstances like this. I don't know what I would have done.

Quoting CoolRelax:

Hopefully ole boy will be right there when the baby is born to assert his parental rights.  I'd have the child tested then take her to court for custody/visitation.  He's going to need a lawyer.  This chick is good and crazy.

"So, basically I had unprotected sex with a bi-sexual man along with unprotected sex with some other dude, I don't know which is the father, but if it's the bisexual dude I plan on boxing him out of my child's life."  <<----- Extra Crispy Crazy. 


queensweet
by on May. 9, 2012 at 11:12 AM
1 mom liked this

I just think she needs some counseling because it is apparent to me that she intentionally set herself up for failure. Unfortunately she is bringing a child into the world and into this craziness. Sigh. I hope everything works out for the best.

One thing I am glad is that at least the guy wants to be involved. But it is crazy to me how females (I say females because not all females are women) can be because if the guy wants to be involved, they don't want him involved; but if he does not want to be involved, then they want him involved. lol. Mmmm. I just feel sorry for the children because they don't have a choice in the matter whom should be their parents. May God help the children aimeen.

Quoting krisdev67:

 This is some crazy mess.  She has sex with a man that's gay/bisexual and ends up pregnant and doesn't want him to be an active parent if he's the father?  Ok, well she's never said if she found this information out before they had sex or after so I'm assuming that she knew all along.  So then why go through all this mess and drama.  Does she realize that that child has a right to know who it's father is?  Does she realize that she ought to be grateful that he wants to be an active part of this child's life?  What she needs to be doing is allowing him and the possible other father to be involved in the pregnancy if they chose to be and get that DNA test. Once she knows who is the father allow that man to help parent that child.  She laid down with him why be embarrassed now?


GraceHudson
by on May. 9, 2012 at 11:14 AM
bump


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