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I have recently read up on Attachment Parenting and realized that's the style of parenting that I have always had and came natural to me. My DS slept in the bed with me from the day I took him home from the hospital till I got married last year. DH was not having it, for good reason though: My son is 3 and has his own bed he rarely slept in. Now we have our newborn dd and my DH is adamant about getting her out of our bed...soon. I told him to bear with me and by 3 months she will be napping and sleeping in her crib. For me its just easier to have her in the bed with me for all of those late night feedings. I have no one helping me with her besides him, but he's working all day, dinner beer and Xbox at night. He never wakes up to see why she's crying at night, but I don't bother him about any of this because he's the one working all day and needs his rest. I hate how he's pressuring me about her sleeping in our bed. He doesn't realize I guess how much easier it is for me to just sit up in bed pick her up and feed her. This way the only way I have to get out of the bed at night is to change her diaper. I'm rambling now...just needed to vent.
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by on May. 15, 2012 at 3:52 AM
Replies (11-20):
MyJaidon
by on May. 15, 2012 at 9:34 AM
lol we not having sex until I go to my postpartum checkup at the end of this month.


Quoting luvthagirl:

My dd is 4 and I can count on one hand the times she's slept in our bed and then it was because she was sick and I wanted to keep a close eye on her.



How do you and your dh make time for sex, cuddling, and pillow talk?

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MyJaidon
by on May. 15, 2012 at 9:38 AM
That is kind of how my DS is. He has his "big boy" moments when he stays in his own bed all night, but most of the time he will start off in his bed then in the morning I find him in ours.


Quoting sexychica25:

My situation was kinda weird. My son slept in his own crib until age 1, but the downside was it was in my room. Then when I tried moving him into his own room he co-slept with until he was 2, theeennn....lol we moved into our house and for the longest he was afraid to sleep in his room. For the most part he's in his own bed, but being that dh is constantly out of town I'm always having a visitor.

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MyJaidon
by on May. 15, 2012 at 9:42 AM
He says keeping them in our bed spoils them and makes my son too sensitive. I just think he doesn't want them in our bed so we can have sex whenever he wants. Nowadays that is the last thing on my mind.


Quoting Aslen:

I'm glad I'm single...

OP, what about in a co-sleeper instead? That way she's int he room, and close, and but IN the bed.

(I cna't beleive I even said that... SOOOO not me)

Is he worried about not getting enough sleep, or is this a control thing?


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sexychica25
by Platinum Member on May. 15, 2012 at 9:42 AM
I think I have your child.lol Then he knows I'm not gonna fight him cuz I don't wanna be disturbed outta my sleep.

Quoting MyJaidon:

That is kind of how my DS is. He has his "big boy" moments when he stays in his own bed all night, but most of the time he will start off in his bed then in the morning I find him in ours.




Quoting sexychica25:

My situation was kinda weird. My son slept in his own crib until age 1, but the downside was it was in my room. Then when I tried moving him into his own room he co-slept with until he was 2, theeennn....lol we moved into our house and for the longest he was afraid to sleep in his room. For the most part he's in his own bed, but being that dh is constantly out of town I'm always having a visitor.

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MandiFuego
by on May. 15, 2012 at 9:46 AM

My son never slept in my bed....and honestly it's because when i was younger, I slept in my moms room, then my sisters bed, then on a couch in the dinning room because i was too afraid to sleep in my room ( I was school aged) by the time I was 9-10 I was still in my moms bed cuz we would move and I could never get used to sleeping in a dark scary room...if I did, ALL the lights had to be on...I did NOT want that cycle with my son...but yeah, it works for some, but I've also seen it backfire, personally... Even now I don't like to sleep alone, but I obviously can.

MyJaidon
by on May. 15, 2012 at 9:51 AM
I don't like sleeping alone either. I was single when my DS was born so I didn't think twice about him being in my bed.


Quoting MandiFuego:

My son never slept in my bed....and honestly it's because when i was younger, I slept in my moms room, then my sisters bed, then on a couch in the dinning room because i was too afraid to sleep in my room ( I was school aged) by the time I was 9-10 I was still in my moms bed cuz we would move and I could never get used to sleeping in a dark scary room...if I did, ALL the lights had to be on...I did NOT want that cycle with my son...but yeah, it works for some, but I've also seen it backfire, personally... Even now I don't like to sleep alone, but I obviously can.


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MyJaidon
by on May. 15, 2012 at 9:53 AM
Same here LOL. I might mutter "Jay get in your bed" still half dreaming. But in my mind I could care less really.


Quoting sexychica25:

I think I have your child.lol Then he knows I'm not gonna fight him cuz I don't wanna be disturbed outta my sleep.



Quoting MyJaidon:

That is kind of how my DS is. He has his "big boy" moments when he stays in his own bed all night, but most of the time he will start off in his bed then in the morning I find him in ours.






Quoting sexychica25:

My situation was kinda weird. My son slept in his own crib until age 1, but the downside was it was in my room. Then when I tried moving him into his own room he co-slept with until he was 2, theeennn....lol we moved into our house and for the longest he was afraid to sleep in his room. For the most part he's in his own bed, but being that dh is constantly out of town I'm always having a visitor.


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luvthagirl
by Gold Member on May. 15, 2012 at 10:02 AM
What happens after postpartum?
I think parents should do whatever works best for them, I knew prior to giving birth that dd would be sleeping and napping in her bed from day one. My dh would let her sleep on his chest for hrs until I broke that up


Quoting MyJaidon:

lol we not having sex until I go to my postpartum checkup at the end of this month.




Quoting luvthagirl:

My dd is 4 and I can count on one hand the times she's slept in our bed and then it was because she was sick and I wanted to keep a close eye on her.





How do you and your dh make time for sex, cuddling, and pillow talk?

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misssy2000
by Gold Member on May. 15, 2012 at 10:14 AM

I enjoyed much of what I learned about AP, for the most part that is how we raised our kids, just a few things didnt really sit well with me but overall I really agree with the main idea of having a healthy attachment with our babies. We belive in cosleeping(me more than dh), but when our kids hit two they dont have to sleep in their beds, but they gotta get the heck out of mine. My youngest actually had to leave around 18 months because he was a little hater lol. Overall I guess the way I look at it is the bed is ours, and babies can really make bedsharing hard so both of us have to be in agreement about having little ones in our bed. Your baby is so new though, do you think you can talk with him find out the reason he may not want the baby in the bed? Maybe there is something specific that bothers him about the baby in the bed that you can change.

GoddessNDaRuff
by on May. 15, 2012 at 10:54 AM

Have you told him that it's easier for you? Is he scared of rolling over on the baby? I co-slept with both my kids, but D was gone when they were that young. Well with Faheem he came home on R&R when he was a week old and spoiled him to death. I don't think he would have let me put him in his crib if I wanted too.

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