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African American Mommies African American Mommies

I know I'm going to take some heat for this but I can take it.

Posted by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:22 PM
  • 53 Replies
5 moms liked this

I'm not sure where I'm going with this. It may just end up being a rant...but here it goes.

Saturday night, I worked an area of my city called the old market. It's old historic part of town with very high end boutiques, brick streets, art galleries, restaurants and probably more than 50 bars...all in a 7 square block area.  This time of year, it is very very heavily populated because of the college world series. One can very easily pick out the pockets of segregated ethnic groups in the area.  They are white, black and hispanic.

Why were they black groups the only ones involved in bar fights, screaming and yelling on the streets and fighting with the police? One young man was even murdered that night.  There hasn't been a murder in the old market in over 25 years.

The groups were asked to disperse several times.  When they refused, they were forcibly removed. Then, they wanted to fight like the police had no right to put their hands on them. It's just unbelievable to me.

Some of the young ladies (and I use the term loosely) were fighting in short dresses and cursing like sailors.

When the police attempted to tape off the crime scene, people did not want to move back and allow room for the investigation.  Again, several people refused to move and tried to physically fight the police. They were slammed to the ground and handcuffed.  They felt like they were being mistreated and the bysanders were taping the incident while making comments like "I got you boo." "They know they wrong." "The police know they aint go no business slamming him like that." 

What is wrong with us? What happened to us?  I know everyone doesn't behave that way. I also know that there are a lot of reasons that kids end up acting this way and believing it's ok. There is a very long list of social ills that have created this problem. When other agencies have failed the children, the police end up dealing with them and that is just the cold hard truth.  I know it isn't unique to the black community, but I know that is the only group I saw misbehaving that night. It also seems that is disproportionately affecting the black community. I'm ashamed to say it, but I just felt a sense of hopelessness wash over me. I won't stay wrap up in my hopelessness. That is just how I felt at that moment. I will continue to try and make my little corner of the world as pleasant as possible for as many as I possibly can...as I have always done.





by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:22 PM
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Replies (1-10):
kikitice
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:28 PM
1 mom liked this

All you can do is make sure that your children are raised to stay away from this foolishness. And you are right, its not just "us" but knowing how far we've come to have those accomplishments reduced to non-sense really makes you mad. I get it.

MandiFuego
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:31 PM
5 moms liked this

Youtube

worldstarhiphop

I think somewhere along the way, people forgot kids need to be raised, in order to be functioning adults in society,....maybe they thought they'd just figure it out along the way?

KymberleeAnn
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:46 PM

Is this town in Boston, Mass? 

Just curious... let let me got back to your story.simple smile

Bunsmommy
by Ruby Member on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:47 PM
11 moms liked this
*****DISCLAIMER, some folks bout to be mad at me!***** please bear in mind even when not using words such as some, or select few they are implied!

From working w/children in middle to upper class areas and children in economically disadvantaged areas I have come to learn that many of the ones in disadvantaged areas grow up being taught to hate the police, fear them, disrespect them, straight NWA "f*ck da police" mentality. While quite a few on the other spectrum (and I'm talking black on both sides) are brought up w/a different image of the police. So as they grow the way they interact w/them are polar opposites. One grows up understanding that law enforcement serves (is supposed to serve) a useful and helpful purpose to the community whole the other grows believing that police and all others are pariah and even when they come to help, it's their fault the problem was there to begin with.
Unfortunately though, I must admit that many police have not helped to change the way we as a ppl view them and interact w/them. I'm quite sure many of us could share stories of watching police brutality, or our experiences of driving while black. I was taught the police were great ppl who helped us and cared about us and then at 5 watched some of Boston's finest beat the hell out of this man only to learn afterward he was the wrong man!
I think when young ppl see images such as Rodney King and the many others that have been unjustly assaulted they do as many officers do blacks.....stereotype them! At some point there needs to be a coming together of law enforcement and our community bc just bc it wasn't happening on this particular evening there have been plenty of times where a crowd of whites can be gathered loud and ruckus on the verge of a mini riot and the group asked to leave is the quiet group of blacks. A change has got to come.

On another note, I so know what you mean about that feeling of hopelessness. On my last job I used to walk through the community and distribute flyers to see my ppl living and acting the way they were would physically and mentally drain me and sometimes I would have to go somewhere and cry.
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CocolateLady
by BookWorm on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:49 PM
I agree with you!

Quoting Bunsmommy:

*****DISCLAIMER, some folks bout to be mad at me!***** please bear in mind even when not using words such as some, or select few they are implied!

From working w/children in middle to upper class areas and children in economically disadvantaged areas I have come to learn that many of the ones in disadvantaged areas grow up being taught to hate the police, fear them, disrespect them, straight NWA "f*ck da police" mentality. While quite a few on the other spectrum (and I'm talking black on both sides) are brought up w/a different image of the police. So as they grow the way they interact w/them are polar opposites. One grows up understanding that law enforcement serves (is supposed to serve) a useful and helpful purpose to the community whole the other grows believing that police and all others are pariah and even when they come to help, it's their fault the problem was there to begin with.
Unfortunately though, I must admit that many police have not helped to change the way we as a ppl view them and interact w/them. I'm quite sure many of us could share stories of watching police brutality, or our experiences of driving while black. I was taught the police were great ppl who helped us and cared about us and then at 5 watched some of Boston's finest beat the hell out of this man only to learn afterward he was the wrong man!
I think when young ppl see images such as Rodney King and the many others that have been unjustly assaulted they do as many officers do blacks.....stereotype them! At some point there needs to be a coming together of law enforcement and our community bc just bc it wasn't happening on this particular evening there have been plenty of times where a crowd of whites can be gathered loud and ruckus on the verge of a mini riot and the group asked to leave is the quiet group of blacks. A change has got to come.

On another note, I so know what you mean about that feeling of hopelessness. On my last job I used to walk through the community and distribute flyers to see my ppl living and acting the way they were would physically and mentally drain me and sometimes I would have to go somewhere and cry.


I have a Computer, a vibrator, & Chocolate..Why should I leave the house? ;-)

KymberleeAnn
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:51 PM

I read your story and I have a comment but I going to leave it for now and savor my thoughts before I speak.

I'll get back to this another time.


KymberleeAnn
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:51 PM

Bump for later

PurplWildFlower
by Blaxican #1 on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:56 PM
1 mom liked this

I believe our youth are the biggest reflection our society has.  History shows it - post Civil Rights movement through today.  Black youth is a mirror of all that is both right and wrong in American society. 

More times than not, the what is wrong gets pumped, forced fed, and revisited over and over and over... The music, the sites, the reality shows it is getting out of control on all levels.  Something has to change, it has to. It is very disheartening and at times down right depressing. 

I just wish they the same amount of attention were given to our youth that have achieved greatness; staring their own businesses, heping their communities, receiving scholarships.  This still all occurs, but we have to dig to find the stories.

I am not down playing personal responsibility either, being accountable is part of maturity.  But when did we decide that he/she were not part of us.  I could go on and on, but I won't.  I just try my best to keep my children and the others that will listen about our history, where we have been all the contributions we have made towards daily living.  Racism see a lot of things fit for us - speaking more towards institutional racism that is and it is sickening.  None the less, something has to give.  

MandiFuego
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 1:58 PM
2 moms liked this

but to generalize just creates more ignorance within a community. There's bad EVERYTHING, but can just as easily be a good side.... I was raised that cops were supposed to help, but living in the real world growin up, I knew this wasn't ALWAYS the case. I was raised to NEVER run from the police ( I mean, even in some homes, if you runnin away from big momma, that means you're the one that broke her favorite vase lol) Even knowing that sometimes a cop wouldn't do their job, or even take advantage of their "power" it never caused me to want to be violent against them...if anything it humbled me, Why challenge a force you KNOW is more likely to win? Some people might call me a "punk" but I'd rather smile and say yes, sir, no sir....w/e it takes to make sure I stay on my feet and free and NOT caged and thrown down like a wild animal. Same way with my teachers, although, I might not have agreed with them, or even flat out KNEW they were wrong, the last thing I was about to do was act crazy to prove a point. Maybe, it's respecting authority, even if it isn't deserved.

Quoting Bunsmommy:

*****DISCLAIMER, some folks bout to be mad at me!***** please bear in mind even when not using words such as some, or select few they are implied!

From working w/children in middle to upper class areas and children in economically disadvantaged areas I have come to learn that many of the ones in disadvantaged areas grow up being taught to hate the police, fear them, disrespect them, straight NWA "f*ck da police" mentality. While quite a few on the other spectrum (and I'm talking black on both sides) are brought up w/a different image of the police. So as they grow the way they interact w/them are polar opposites. One grows up understanding that law enforcement serves (is supposed to serve) a useful and helpful purpose to the community whole the other grows believing that police and all others are pariah and even when they come to help, it's their fault the problem was there to begin with.
Unfortunately though, I must admit that many police have not helped to change the way we as a ppl view them and interact w/them. I'm quite sure many of us could share stories of watching police brutality, or our experiences of driving while black. I was taught the police were great ppl who helped us and cared about us and then at 5 watched some of Boston's finest beat the hell out of this man only to learn afterward he was the wrong man!
I think when young ppl see images such as Rodney King and the many others that have been unjustly assaulted they do as many officers do blacks.....stereotype them! At some point there needs to be a coming together of law enforcement and our community bc just bc it wasn't happening on this particular evening there have been plenty of times where a crowd of whites can be gathered loud and ruckus on the verge of a mini riot and the group asked to leave is the quiet group of blacks. A change has got to come.

On another note, I so know what you mean about that feeling of hopelessness. On my last job I used to walk through the community and distribute flyers to see my ppl living and acting the way they were would physically and mentally drain me and sometimes I would have to go somewhere and cry.


Carma998
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 2:01 PM


Quoting Bunsmommy:

*****DISCLAIMER, some folks bout to be mad at me!***** please bear in mind even when not using words such as some, or select few they are implied!

From working w/children in middle to upper class areas and children in economically disadvantaged areas I have come to learn that many of the ones in disadvantaged areas grow up being taught to hate the police, fear them, disrespect them, straight NWA "f*ck da police" mentality. While quite a few on the other spectrum (and I'm talking black on both sides) are brought up w/a different image of the police. So as they grow the way they interact w/them are polar opposites. One grows up understanding that law enforcement serves (is supposed to serve) a useful and helpful purpose to the community whole the other grows believing that police and all others are pariah and even when they come to help, it's their fault the problem was there to begin with.
Unfortunately though, I must admit that many police have not helped to change the way we as a ppl view them and interact w/them. I'm quite sure many of us could share stories of watching police brutality, or our experiences of driving while black. I was taught the police were great ppl who helped us and cared about us and then at 5 watched some of Boston's finest beat the hell out of this man only to learn afterward he was the wrong man!
I think when young ppl see images such as Rodney King and the many others that have been unjustly assaulted they do as many officers do blacks.....stereotype them! At some point there needs to be a coming together of law enforcement and our community bc just bc it wasn't happening on this particular evening there have been plenty of times where a crowd of whites can be gathered loud and ruckus on the verge of a mini riot and the group asked to leave is the quiet group of blacks. A change has got to come.

On another note, I so know what you mean about that feeling of hopelessness. On my last job I used to walk through the community and distribute flyers to see my ppl living and acting the way they were would physically and mentally drain me and sometimes I would have to go somewhere and cry.

I absolutely agree with you! Black people, historically, have been justified in their belief that the police will not protect them and will, in fact harm them.  I understand that completely.  My biggest problem was with the behavior that got the attention of the police in the first place...the screaming and cursing on the street corners...fighting and calling each other all kinds of names in those short little hoochie dresses,...starting bar fights....shooting each other.  It just all seems like too too much. I felt like crying.  Even if ppl don't like or trust the police....they still have to get out of a crime scene and they do not have the right to refuse. Even if they, justifiably, do not like or trust the police, they have to know there will be consequences for refusing to obey their orders.

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