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Strawberry Letter 2/4/13 *update*

Posted by on Feb. 4, 2013 at 4:08 PM
  • 8 Replies

Good morning Steve and Shirley Good morning Steve and Shirley, I am a 33 year old with a good career, mother of 3 and I care for my disabled mom. I was looking for Mr. Right in all the wrong places, all the while he was right in front of me. My 35 year old significant other is wonderful. He's good with my kids, good to me, my family loves him and I love him. We share similar goals and dreams and everything had been going smoothly. He doesn't look at other women when we are together and we have discussed our future together. The problem is his best friend. This guy tried to hook him up with girls, before we got together. We've been together for 8 months and my man went on a "pre-us" planned vacation to Puerto Rico with his best friend, best friend�s baby momma and a girl they tried to hook him up with. He claims nothing happened between him and the girl and despite my disbelief, there is no proof otherwise. He spends every weekend with me and at least 3 weeknights. Last week he mentioned he was going to visit his best friend who lives 2 hours away and I said it was fine. Well at the last minute, he tells me the best friend�s baby momma was going to be there and also the girl they tried to hook him up with in Puerto Rico. I started to feel uncomfortable. He claims he is not interested in the girl and I know I satisfy him, so I shouldn't feel insecure. But something is not right here. We are in a relationship, so should I just be okay with him going on this weekend trip and hang out with this woman? Am I overreacting? If the roles were reversed I know he wouldn't feel comfortable. Help, I'm lost and confused and don't know what else to do. There�s another thing you should know: He has not told me he loves me yet.

 

*sorry ladies, the entire letter didn't show up*....so I put it back on here again...

by on Feb. 4, 2013 at 4:08 PM
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Replies (1-8):
Hottmomma607
by Group Mod - Trica on Feb. 4, 2013 at 9:19 PM
1 mom liked this

Oooooo I don't know? That would be a hard one? Its up to the guy to put his big drawers on tell his best friend he isn't looking any more!

Bunsmommy
by Ruby Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:09 AM
How can you be upset about a situation that took place before you? How can you question someone about a vacation they went on before you and him were an item? That would be like him asking and getting angry about the origin of her three kids. That's a grown ass man, was she thinking he was going to be a virgin before he came across her?


As for her insecurities right now about him going to hang out with his friend, she's going to have to make a choice to either trust he's going to do right or step away from the relationship. She sounds as if she wants him to let go of his friendship because of the fact that he tried to hook his friend up with women BEFORE they got together, lady get serious! Why is she so damned concerned with what took place prior to their relationship?


As for him waiting to the last minute to disclose that the "baby mama" and her friend would be there;, truthfully, she sounds like a nagging drama filled broad and he probably didn't want to have to deal with that until he had to. She needs to be grateful that he felt like he could he tell her, he could've been deceitful ran off and not said anything about her being there. And someone needs to tell her that "I love you" isn't an indicator that he's going to be faithful!
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grandmotherof6
by Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:26 AM

Well if they are not marry,  then he has every right to go where he please,  you said he was a good man,  so learn to trust him,

ashfitzmann
by Bronze Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:26 AM
She said last week he told her he was planning on going. I guess she's wondering why does the girl still have to go with them. Idk, i think she should have been a little clearer

Quoting Bunsmommy:

How can you be upset about a situation that took place before you? How can you question someone about a vacation they went on before you and him were an item? That would be like him asking and getting angry about the origin of her three kids. That's a grown ass man, was she thinking he was going to be a virgin before he came across her?



As for her insecurities right now about him going to hang out with his friend, she's going to have to make a choice to either trust he's going to do right or step away from the relationship. She sounds as if she wants him to let go of his friendship because of the fact that he tried to hook his friend up with women BEFORE they got together, lady get serious! Why is she so damned concerned with what took place prior to their relationship?



As for him waiting to the last minute to disclose that the "baby mama" and her friend would be there;, truthfully, she sounds like a nagging drama filled broad and he probably didn't want to have to deal with that until he had to. She needs to be grateful that he felt like he could he tell her, he could've been deceitful ran off and not said anything about her being there. And someone needs to tell her that "I love you" isn't an indicator that he's going to be faithful!
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Hottmomma607
by Group Mod - Trica on Feb. 5, 2013 at 12:59 PM
I agree if thats all in the past who cares?? So did I have an illiteracy problem and read that wrong?? Was these things happening before her??
I think its hard for an GF of 8months to say dump your best friend! But he needs to be a big boy and tell his homeboy to sit down!


Quoting Bunsmommy:

How can you be upset about a situation that took place before you? How can you question someone about a vacation they went on before you and him were an item? That would be like him asking and getting angry about the origin of her three kids. That's a grown ass man, was she thinking he was going to be a virgin before he came across her?



As for her insecurities right now about him going to hang out with his friend, she's going to have to make a choice to either trust he's going to do right or step away from the relationship. She sounds as if she wants him to let go of his friendship because of the fact that he tried to hook his friend up with women BEFORE they got together, lady get serious! Why is she so damned concerned with what took place prior to their relationship?



As for him waiting to the last minute to disclose that the "baby mama" and her friend would be there;, truthfully, she sounds like a nagging drama filled broad and he probably didn't want to have to deal with that until he had to. She needs to be grateful that he felt like he could he tell her, he could've been deceitful ran off and not said anything about her being there. And someone needs to tell her that "I love you" isn't an indicator that he's going to be faithful!
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Bunsmommy
by Ruby Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 2:10 PM

The best friend was trying to hook him up with women before their relationship. Seriously, how can you have resentment for someone who tried to hook him up before your relationship began? The trip he went on with the friend, friend's woman, an her friend happened before Ms. Career Womam; again, seriously why she mad? Now, he told her he was going to see his friend, which she didn't like (but said something to the effect of she was going to let him go) and then came back to say that the friend's woman and her friend would be there so now she's upset. For that, she should feel a way, but giving him the benefit of the doubt maybe he just found out they were coming, he's not given her a reason to distrust him. He actually appears to be very trustworthy, she seems to be looking for something to fault him for. 

Bunsmommy
by Ruby Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 2:14 PM

He mentioned last week that he's going to visit his friend, but the vacation they all went on was before they became a couple. She shouldn't have issues with that because as she termed it, it was "pre-us", he owes her nothing from that aspect. 

Quoting ashfitzmann:

She said last week he told her he was planning on going. I guess she's wondering why does the girl still have to go with them. Idk, i think she should have been a little clearer

Quoting Bunsmommy:

How can you be upset about a situation that took place before you? How can you question someone about a vacation they went on before you and him were an item? That would be like him asking and getting angry about the origin of her three kids. That's a grown ass man, was she thinking he was going to be a virgin before he came across her?



As for her insecurities right now about him going to hang out with his friend, she's going to have to make a choice to either trust he's going to do right or step away from the relationship. She sounds as if she wants him to let go of his friendship because of the fact that he tried to hook his friend up with women BEFORE they got together, lady get serious! Why is she so damned concerned with what took place prior to their relationship?



As for him waiting to the last minute to disclose that the "baby mama" and her friend would be there;, truthfully, she sounds like a nagging drama filled broad and he probably didn't want to have to deal with that until he had to. She needs to be grateful that he felt like he could he tell her, he could've been deceitful ran off and not said anything about her being there. And someone needs to tell her that "I love you" isn't an indicator that he's going to be faithful!


ashfitzmann
by Bronze Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 8:39 PM
I agree with you. I was confused myself.And no i was not saying you read it wrong or was illiterate.

Quoting Bunsmommy:

He mentioned last week that he's going to visit his friend, but the vacation they all went on was before they became a couple. She shouldn't have issues with that because as she termed it, it was "pre-us", he owes her nothing from that aspect. 

Quoting ashfitzmann:

She said last week he told her he was planning on going. I guess she's wondering why does the girl still have to go with them. Idk, i think she should have been a little clearer



Quoting Bunsmommy:

How can you be upset about a situation that took place before you? How can you question someone about a vacation they went on before you and him were an item? That would be like him asking and getting angry about the origin of her three kids. That's a grown ass man, was she thinking he was going to be a virgin before he came across her?




As for her insecurities right now about him going to hang out with his friend, she's going to have to make a choice to either trust he's going to do right or step away from the relationship. She sounds as if she wants him to let go of his friendship because of the fact that he tried to hook his friend up with women BEFORE they got together, lady get serious! Why is she so damned concerned with what took place prior to their relationship?




As for him waiting to the last minute to disclose that the "baby mama" and her friend would be there;, truthfully, she sounds like a nagging drama filled broad and he probably didn't want to have to deal with that until he had to. She needs to be grateful that he felt like he could he tell her, he could've been deceitful ran off and not said anything about her being there. And someone needs to tell her that "I love you" isn't an indicator that he's going to be faithful!


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