my son who is 10 will be 11 in two weeks has been acting up in school constantly the teacher calls me every day, I've punished him whipped his ass, took all toys , ipod , ds and scooter from him he stil asks like a donkey in school, its gotten to the point the school has referred him ti see a therapist. it hurts me to my heart that he wont tell me whats wrong with him. not looking for smart ass replies just suggestions if you have them. 
Hey Alishea...-
I have a 12 year old that has ADHD hyperactive type and he is oppositional at times. In my experience, kids don't really enjoy being in trouble. If loosing privileges don't seem to phase him, you might want to look into Oppositional disorder.
In the meantime, it appears that he has so many nice things, that you may need to take away several things at once to get his attention. I'm of the Dr. Phil mindset. Take everything except his mattress. Lock up all electronics. Maybe even leaving them in your office or trunk or shed. He has to show behavioral change to get them back. One at a time.
Now work on your relationship with him. Try not to hit him. That tends to backfire. Either you'll hit him and hurt yourself. (been there, done that) Or it'll go on to the point where he'll get the idea to hit you back. (one day that's not gonna work for you) No condemnation here... just real talk.
Kid's don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care. Sit with him, while he does his homework. Or have him do it in the kitchen, while you make dinner. I know it seems like he's too old for that, but some kids need what we "ADHD'ers" call a body-double.
See the therapist. He may tell the therapist what he won't tell you. Are you a single mom? Do you think he's acting out because he "UNFAIRLY" blames you for his dad not being around? Kids sometimes think strange things.
I wish you the best. I have an idea of what you must be going through. You've done the right thing by reaching out. Blessings!!!
he isnt saying and the teachers arent saying he is
Quoting CoolRelax:
Is he being bullied?
take you so much for telling me of your experiances ive done the taking everything , yea the hitting is getting old and i have hurt myself doing so, im looking into therapy right now waiting for one that was recominded by the school , i am a single mother and though his dad isnt around often my bestfriend is male and takes him out just to do guy things all the time . im going to look up some info now!!! i ve been dealing with this for sto long and i feel myself becoming stressed out. thanks agian for taking the time out to respond!
Quoting Mi8Mi8:
Hey Alishea...-
I have a 12 year old that has ADHD hyperactive type and he is oppositional at times. In my experience, kids don't really enjoy being in trouble. If loosing privileges don't seem to phase him, you might want to look into Oppositional disorder.
In the meantime, it appears that he has so many nice things, that you may need to take away several things at once to get his attention. I'm of the Dr. Phil mindset. Take everything except his mattress. Lock up all electronics. Maybe even leaving them in your office or trunk or shed. He has to show behavioral change to get them back. One at a time.
Now work on your relationship with him. Try not to hit him. That tends to backfire. Either you'll hit him and hurt yourself. (been there, done that) Or it'll go on to the point where he'll get the idea to hit you back. (one day that's not gonna work for you) No condemnation here... just real talk.
Kid's don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care. Sit with him, while he does his homework. Or have him do it in the kitchen, while you make dinner. I know it seems like he's too old for that, but some kids need what we "ADHD'ers" call a body-double.
See the therapist. He may tell the therapist what he won't tell you. Are you a single mom? Do you think he's acting out because he "UNFAIRLY" blames you for his dad not being around? Kids sometimes think strange things.
I wish you the best. I have an idea of what you must be going through. You've done the right thing by reaching out. Blessings!!!
You're very welcome. Hang in there. Something keeps telling me he's mad about his Dad. Be his safety net. Allow him to cry if necessary. He may also be testing you to see what it would take to make you go away too. Be steadfast. Let him know that you'll always love him. You'll always be there, as much as he'll let you,
But at the same time, there are house rules. And he can't treat you any 'ole kinda way! Love and Structure, boundries, ya know?
I'm praying for you. I just know he'll come around.!
Are you going to take him to see a therapist, as suggested?
Also since beating and taking away doesn't work I would try counseling or rewarding for something that he did that was good. Also try doing the opposite of what you normally do. Some kids get immune to discipline and yelling and think its normal.
Maybe Sunday school or have him volunteer somewhere that would force him to help others in the weekend.
Also is there a possibility he maybe bullied?
im looking into therapey now i have tried not hiting him just talking to him ive tried rewarding him i give him time with me one on one no i only work one job. i have really tried it all i pray that thereapy works nothing tramatic has happened to him or in the home! he has been im programs through his school which had mentors he was happy with doing it but still had the same issues
Quoting ginene:
Do you have two jobs? I asked just just in case he wants attention.
Also since beating and taking away doesn't work I would try counseling or rewarding for something that he did that was good. Also try doing the opposite of what you normally do. Some kids get immune to discipline and yelling and think its normal.
Maybe Sunday school or have him volunteer somewhere that would force him to help others in the weekend.
Also is there a possibility he maybe bullied?
so for all the typos
Quoting alisheamonet33:
take you so much for telling me of your experiances ive done the taking everything , yea the hitting is getting old and i have hurt myself doing so, im looking into therapy right now waiting for one that was recominded by the school , i am a single mother and though his dad isnt around often my bestfriend is male and takes him out just to do guy things all the time . im going to look up some info now!!! i ve been dealing with this for sto long and i feel myself becoming stressed out. thanks agian for taking the time out to respond!
Quoting Mi8Mi8:
Hey Alishea...-
I have a 12 year old that has ADHD hyperactive type and he is oppositional at times. In my experience, kids don't really enjoy being in trouble. If loosing privileges don't seem to phase him, you might want to look into Oppositional disorder.
In the meantime, it appears that he has so many nice things, that you may need to take away several things at once to get his attention. I'm of the Dr. Phil mindset. Take everything except his mattress. Lock up all electronics. Maybe even leaving them in your office or trunk or shed. He has to show behavioral change to get them back. One at a time.
Now work on your relationship with him. Try not to hit him. That tends to backfire. Either you'll hit him and hurt yourself. (been there, done that) Or it'll go on to the point where he'll get the idea to hit you back. (one day that's not gonna work for you) No condemnation here... just real talk.
Kid's don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care. Sit with him, while he does his homework. Or have him do it in the kitchen, while you make dinner. I know it seems like he's too old for that, but some kids need what we "ADHD'ers" call a body-double.
See the therapist. He may tell the therapist what he won't tell you. Are you a single mom? Do you think he's acting out because he "UNFAIRLY" blames you for his dad not being around? Kids sometimes think strange things.
I wish you the best. I have an idea of what you must be going through. You've done the right thing by reaching out. Blessings!!!
No more pencils ✏...No more books📕... No more teacher's dirty l👀ks
- alisheamonet33
on Mar. 7, 2013 at 4:02 PM