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Is it necessary to have a relationship with a stepparent? My kids SM is very angry and lashes out a lot in family therapy. She finally admitted to how she was angry with herself and that she felt that my XDH has taken her for granted when it comes to our children because he delegates so many duties to her when they have the kids. Also she stated that she didn't want our kids to come stay with them because she doesn't want that responsibility. She even thought that I wanted my kids father to take our teenage DS due to me calling him on several occasions about him being a class clown.

Some of you may remember an old post that I had concerning her scratching my daughters face
for peeing on herself(she said it was an accident but I told her she had no busy touching her) and my XDH breaking her finger from not eating. So as a result of so much we are all in counseling. The counselor said that of course the biological parents are the primary disciplinarians, POINT BLANK PERIOD. Also she felt that the stepparents and biological parents should try to have some form of relationship. My thing is that my XDH and the SM has put me threw all sorts of HELL with court for stupid mess so why do I need to have a relationship with SM. She's always angry about everything and downs me and thinking I wanted my XDH(he was abusive) back. Ummm no thanks. My name ain't Everlast.

I may seem all over in this post but I was curious as what you all thought. If I could write a book in this post, you would be shocked.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 8:54 AM
Replies (31-37):
massenberg
by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 4:45 PM

 you r much better than me hon... sm has scratched her face (says she sorry) than breaks her finger(sorry abt that) how much more r you gonna take, no i wld not send my kids over there until shes stable with doctors orders no law wil make ur kids stay there if sm is unstabile. did u let the councler know abt the things she did to your kid. I let someone no that is scary.plus shes already said in so many ways that she really dont want no bother she wants their dad not them. where ur tryin to make her see thats its a package deal shes jus not buyin.   


Quoting mami2my3rugratz:

Is it necessary to have a relationship with a stepparent? My kids SM is very angry and lashes out a lot in family therapy. She finally admitted to how she was angry with herself and that she felt that my XDH has taken her for granted when it comes to our children because he delegates so many duties to her when they have the kids. Also she stated that she didn't want our kids to come stay with them because she doesn't want that responsibility. She even thought that I wanted my kids father to take our teenage DS due to me calling him on several occasions about him being a class clown.

Some of you may remember an old post that I had concerning her scratching my daughters face
for peeing on herself(she said it was an accident but I told her she had no busy touching her) and my XDH breaking her finger from not eating. So as a result of so much we are all in counseling. The counselor said that of course the biological parents are the primary disciplinarians, POINT BLANK PERIOD. Also she felt that the stepparents and biological parents should try to have some form of relationship. My thing is that my XDH and the SM has put me threw all sorts of HELL with court for stupid mess so why do I need to have a relationship with SM. She's always angry about everything and downs me and thinking I wanted my XDH(he was abusive) back. Ummm no thanks. My name ain't Everlast.

I may seem all over in this post but I was curious as what you all thought. If I could write a book in this post, you would be shocked.



4kings1queen
by Silver Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:30 PM
Im one and i dont have a relationship with his ex. To keep down drama,we dont talk. Imo thats best.
mami2my3rugratz
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 7:36 AM
SM scratched DD's face and her daddy broke her finger. I reported them both to child protective services and the counselor for our family therapy said I jumped the gun. I don't regret my decision and I would do it again. Their names are in the system and the SM is so mad because she wanted to open a business for Childcare. She said I was trying to ruin her and I knew nothing about that but you just can't harm my child. Now she's saying she never did it and that my DD did it to herself when she already told me she did it but it was an accident. And I don't see why their dad don't see it. She wants nothing to do with them.


Quoting massenberg:

 you r much better than me hon... sm has scratched her face (says she sorry) than breaks her finger(sorry abt that) how much more r you gonna take, no i wld not send my kids over there until shes stable with doctors orders no law wil make ur kids stay there if sm is unstabile. did u let the councler know abt the things she did to your kid. I let someone no that is scary.plus shes already said in so many ways that she really dont want no bother she wants their dad not them. where ur tryin to make her see thats its a package deal shes jus not buyin.   



Quoting mami2my3rugratz:

Is it necessary to have a relationship with a stepparent? My kids SM is very angry and lashes out a lot in family therapy. She finally admitted to how she was angry with herself and that she felt that my XDH has taken her for granted when it comes to our children because he delegates so many duties to her when they have the kids. Also she stated that she didn't want our kids to come stay with them because she doesn't want that responsibility. She even thought that I wanted my kids father to take our teenage DS due to me calling him on several occasions about him being a class clown.



Some of you may remember an old post that I had concerning her scratching my daughters face

for peeing on herself(she said it was an accident but I told her she had no busy touching her) and my XDH breaking her finger from not eating. So as a result of so much we are all in counseling. The counselor said that of course the biological parents are the primary disciplinarians, POINT BLANK PERIOD. Also she felt that the stepparents and biological parents should try to have some form of relationship. My thing is that my XDH and the SM has put me threw all sorts of HELL with court for stupid mess so why do I need to have a relationship with SM. She's always angry about everything and downs me and thinking I wanted my XDH(he was abusive) back. Ummm no thanks. My name ain't Everlast.



I may seem all over in this post but I was curious as what you all thought. If I could write a book in this post, you would be shocked.





Posted on CafeMom Mobile
mami2my3rugratz
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 7:38 AM
I think it's best for me as well. She's just too angry and hostile. It doesn't take but a split second and she's spazzing. She even went off on my ex in counseling. He was sitting there looking crazy.


Quoting 4kings1queen:

Im one and i dont have a relationship with his ex. To keep down drama,we dont talk. Imo thats best.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Sigmalade
by Bronze Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 10:45 PM

See if you can go to court and get visitation so that your kids only have to go one weekend a month, if that much. I would not trust a woman that didn't like my kids(although she is praying for your longevity) and an ex that broke my child's finger. Still maintain an open relationship by having the kids call once a week or something or like that, but neither of those individuals sound stable. I can't remember the last time that I talked to my daddy's wife. Best relationship ever! I will see her for like three minutes on mother's day if she happens to be around. I send a weekly email or text to my dad and this is the most communication we have had in years. I am not stressed by their craziness!

3xangel
by Bronze Member on Apr. 28, 2013 at 1:32 AM
She shouldn't have gotten with him if she didn't want to be a stepparent. I also agree with OP who said she probably thought he would end up being a deadbeat dad to your children. This seems like too much and if he is abusing your children (broke your child finger) I would stop visitation and just collect cs. Your children do not deserve to be abused mentally and physically and it sounds like that's what happening over there.
3xangel
by Bronze Member on Apr. 28, 2013 at 1:33 AM
Also, I would question his character because I don't know any man that's worth a damn that would be with a female who felt a negative way towards his children.
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