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Did you stay or leave?

Posted by on Jun. 2, 2014 at 9:06 PM
  • 24 Replies
Have you ever stayed with a man that cheated?
Why or why not?
by on Jun. 2, 2014 at 9:06 PM
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Replies (1-10):
ms.renae
by Bronze Member on Jun. 2, 2014 at 9:27 PM
Hell no, kicked my now ex husband out. I have to much respect for myself to stay with someone that would cheat. I have a one strike rule.
michaelsmom25
by Silver Member on Jun. 2, 2014 at 10:13 PM
3 moms liked this
No. I've always had too many options, ain't nobody got time for that lol ;)
MANILOVE
by Silver Member on Jun. 2, 2014 at 11:08 PM
I don't see it as a lack of self respect to work it out with your mate after her/she has cheated. If it's a continuous behavior then he needs to go. What I have an issue with, is women that act like their man don't. When in reality his behaviors clearly shows that his cheating.

Quoting ms.renae: Hell no, kicked my now ex husband out. I have to much respect for myself to stay with someone that would cheat. I have a one strike rule.
PurplWildFlower
by on Jun. 2, 2014 at 11:10 PM
Not dh, but with my DS bio...yes. I knew it wasn't going to last. I take my hat off to women/men (married) that stay and work through it.
spidermansmom
by Bronze Member on Jun. 2, 2014 at 11:56 PM
6 moms liked this
Yes. While dh and I were dating early on I found out he had cheated. At the time when I found out I had just had his baby and even though it was 1 time and yrs before, it still hurt. We ended up going to couples counseling and may 18th has made 7 yrs we've been married and November will make 10 that we've been together.
CinnamonBunns84
by on Jun. 3, 2014 at 1:15 AM
Yes. I was in denial that he was cheating although the evidence was clear. With my naive self I kept saying I have to catch him in the act before I leave. Tired with the crap, I told him it was over and he didn't have a problem with it; his foundation was already set with the other woman.
ms.renae
by Bronze Member on Jun. 3, 2014 at 1:34 AM
I personally wouldn't waste my time. You might not see it as lack of self respect but I do.

Quoting MANILOVE: I don't see it as a lack of self respect to work it out with your mate after her/she has cheated. If it's a continuous behavior then he needs to go. What I have an issue with, is women that act like their man don't. When in reality his behaviors clearly shows that his cheating.

Quoting ms.renae: Hell no, kicked my now ex husband out. I have to much respect for myself to stay with someone that would cheat. I have a one strike rule.
mrsary
by Platinum Member on Jun. 3, 2014 at 1:41 AM
Yes. Then he kept cheating, so we broke up anyway!!
Nisha929
by on Jun. 3, 2014 at 7:14 AM

Yes I have. I loved him (or so I thought) so I tried to work things out but he kept doing it so I had to go my way and let him go his.   

spidermansmom
by Bronze Member on Jun. 3, 2014 at 8:20 AM
3 moms liked this
I think it depends on the man. How I found out was something out of a made up book...like it was out of the norm that I didn't see it coming. I digress.
If a man is sorry for getting caught he will do it again. If a man is truly sorry he would not.
I was caught cheating before I met dh and I was never actually sorry for it but rather that I got caught. So of course the moment I thought I was in clear I'd do it again.
Dh and I weren't engaged and we could have went our separate ways. I told him I would move closer to him so he could have unlimited access to his child but I wanted out. He begged and pleaded for me to go to counseling and begrudgingly I agreed.
Ladies, I will say it was the HARDEST thing I ever did. To forgive is easier said then done. It hurt more because I knew instantaneously I was going to stay. I loved him. And I didn't think that was a good enough reason to stay. So I was tortured within myself.
Fast forward to today: our marriage isn't perfect. Between his crazy work hours and my being forced to be single married parent, we have our issues. I don't believe he has done it again. We talk about the incident sometimes in passing and he always says "it was like dying. He had this picture of us married with kids and happy and because of that one time he almost lost it."

Sorry for long--ness! I really just wanted to say that to each her own. I NEVER would have thought I would have stayed. I come from a long line of women who has had a spouse cheat and LEFT. It was automatically assumed that I would do the same. And for a while I know my family thought some kind of way about it, hell some probably still do, but I didn't and still don't care what they think.my husband is a good man and sometimes good people make bad decisions.
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