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OT-He pees when he throws a tantrum

Posted by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 12:51 PM
  • 10 Replies

 My son is 19 months old.  I've been working with him on potty training for a few months now because he proved he was ready.  I let him run around all day without a diaper and we don't have any accidents.  He comes to me and tells me when he's got to go.  With that said, he will pee when he throws a tantrum.  He's always thrown himself around and tried to hurt himself and unless I think he's concussed or fractured something I'm going to ignore him (wish I could get his grandma to do the same).  For awhile I wasn't sure if he was doing it on purpose or if he simply lost control of his functions when he was throwing a tantrum.  I've since determined that he's doing it on purpose because of his actions while he's doing it.

Now, on the rare occassion that he does have an accident (usually poo), I don't make any fuss over it except to snatch him and put him on the potty if I catch him in the act.  When he's doing it on purpose, I pop his butt and then take him to the potty.  I don't want to have him associate the potty with punishment, but I don't know how to make him stop peeing when he's mad.

by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 12:51 PM
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Replies (1-10):
WilliamsMama08
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 1:23 PM

Does he not enjoy the feeling of being wet (I wouldn't)?  If so, what about just putting him in a time out?  Letting him sit there for 1-2 minutes wet isn't going to harm anything.



ncbirdie
by Robyn on Jan. 25, 2010 at 1:36 PM


Quoting WilliamsMama08:

Does he not enjoy the feeling of being wet (I wouldn't)?  If so, what about just putting him in a time out?  Letting him sit there for 1-2 minutes wet isn't going to harm anything.

He runs around naked for the most part.  I've found that when I've got the cloth training pants on him he's more likely to go and then tell me that he's wet.  Naked, he'll tell me that he has to go.  When he throws a tantrum, it's my carpet that gets wet rather than him.

WilliamsMama08
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 1:46 PM

W runs naked too.  What about putting big boy pants on him (underwear).  Explain to him what they are.... maybe the excitement of the underwear will make him not want to go in them?  W is only 15 months, but when I converted his crib to the toddler bed, I let him "help" and he just gets so excited to go to bed now.

Quoting ncbirdie:


Quoting WilliamsMama08:

Does he not enjoy the feeling of being wet (I wouldn't)?  If so, what about just putting him in a time out?  Letting him sit there for 1-2 minutes wet isn't going to harm anything.

He runs around naked for the most part.  I've found that when I've got the cloth training pants on him he's more likely to go and then tell me that he's wet.  Naked, he'll tell me that he has to go.  When he throws a tantrum, it's my carpet that gets wet rather than him.


ncbirdie
by Robyn on Jan. 25, 2010 at 1:55 PM

I can't find genuine underwear to fit him.  As it is the training pants (just like underwear, but have a little bit more padding in the center to absorb accidents) are size 2T and that's the smallest I've found.  He's 19 months but has a 12month butt.  And while he's still really good at telling me when he has to go while wearing them, we have a lot more accidents. 

WilliamsMama08
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 2:02 PM

Yeah I hear ya... W has a TINY butt and I can't find anything small enough either.  THIS  is probably what you have, but she will make them to you exact measurements.  However, if you can find some without extra material, he might not like the feeling of the pee running down his leg and stop... I dunno, just thinking out loud. :)  Hope you find a solution! 

Quoting ncbirdie:

I can't find genuine underwear to fit him.  As it is the training pants (just like underwear, but have a little bit more padding in the center to absorb accidents) are size 2T and that's the smallest I've found.  He's 19 months but has a 12month butt.  And while he's still really good at telling me when he has to go while wearing them, we have a lot more accidents. 


ncbirdie
by Robyn on Jan. 25, 2010 at 2:20 PM

 I have the Gerber brand training pants that you can get in the baby section of Wal-Mart.

gdiamante
by Gina on Jan. 25, 2010 at 4:56 PM
Quoting ncbirdie:


Quoting WilliamsMama08:

Does he not enjoy the feeling of being wet (I wouldn't)?  If so, what about just putting him in a time out?  Letting him sit there for 1-2 minutes wet isn't going to harm anything.

He runs around naked for the most part.  I've found that when I've got the cloth training pants on him he's more likely to go and then tell me that he's wet.  Naked, he'll tell me that he has to go.  When he throws a tantrum, it's my carpet that gets wet rather than him.

At this point, probably better to get him into the clothing habit. Maybe get him sonme superhero underwear or something like that to get him interested in wearing it.

EDITED TO ADD...oh,. hadn't seen that size was an issue. Hmm. Now that is a challenge. I don't suppose there is any way you can limit where he goes when he';s naked?


ncbirdie
by Robyn on Jan. 26, 2010 at 12:10 AM


Quoting gdiamante:

EDITED TO ADD...oh,. hadn't seen that size was an issue. Hmm. Now that is a challenge. I don't suppose there is any way you can limit where he goes when he';s naked?


Yeah, we've got the living room baby-proofed.  The only places in my house that don't have carpeting are the kitchen/laundry room area, and 2 of my 3 bathrooms.  And the only reason those bathrooms don't have carpeting is because my husband ripped it up and put down vinyl tile.

And he has no problem wearing the training pants that I have for him.  He just feels that because he has something on his butt, he can just pee in it.  And then he comes to me telling me he needs changed.  He doesn't quite realize the difference between a diaper and training pants; just that there's something on his butt.  He does really well about letting me know when he has to go when the butt's just flapping in the breeze.

I know he's doing this during his tantrums to get attention.  For a long time now he'll throw himself back thinking I'll be all sympathetic if he hurts himself (usually these tantrums are because I stop holding him or I place him where he doesn't want to be).  And even though I know he's in pain from some of the stuff he's done (I was actually concerned during the couple days that he was going from a complete standing position to throwing himself backwards on the floor with no butt-landing in between), I don't give in to his tantrums.  Now, he's started peeing when he throws a tantrum and that has me swatting his butt and putting him on the potty.  You think I should just ignore it and treat it just like a genuine accident?  Because even with a genuine accident I take him to the potty if I catch him in the act of deficating.

MelaniesMama
by on Jan. 26, 2010 at 12:16 AM

My 2.5 YO does hte same thing!  When shes throwing a tantrum she pee's her pants. She's been potty trained for about 7 months.  It makes me soo mad!  im 99.9% sure she's doing it on purpose.  I dont know what to do about it.

Lovemybrayden
by on Jan. 26, 2010 at 12:28 AM

You can use little shorts and get them a tad small so they fit close...like the one at wal-mart the granimals....I would put him in time out then when he chills out make him help you clean up the pee.....make him soak it up and scrub the carpet everytime he does it....that way everytime he pees on the floor he knows that he will be the one cleaning it up......I made the mistake of letting my son run around all day naked to potty train and he would not and I mean WOULD not put underware on. I had to make him do it. He didn't want to wear them because he was afraid he was going to pee in them and that he was not going to be able to pull them down. I wish I would have started him off right off the bat with underware. My son used to pee just to pee on the floor....I started the whole he had to clean it up and he finally stopped doing it. I don't know how that would work with a 19 month old. My son just now is almost potty trained and he is 3.

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