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my husband said he doesn't want me breastfeeding past a year~

Posted by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:07 PM
  • 31 Replies

I was talking to my husband and he said past a year would be too strange for him, and that if she could walk up to me and pull up my shirt and start nursing that would be it. I told him I would like her to self wean, well of course not before a year!

Anytime after though, if she is ready to stop then I will stop. If its 15 months or 20 months! I wanted so badly to breastfeed my son past a year, but I lacked some important information back then. Like drinking enough fluids for myself, eating well for myself, and I gave him WAY too much baby food!

I don't want to put a number of months on it though when I will stop. I want to stop when we, meaning my daughter and me feel comfortable doing so. I think its hard to imagine for him, or men in general breastfeeding a child that is over a year, or walking or whatever. It sometimes is for me, but like everything, its a slow process. Its not like they go from being a baby to a toddler over night, although sometimes it feels that way! Can I picture myself breastfeeding a two year old? No, not right now, because that's not where I am at, I am breastfeeding a six month old.

If anyone has some benefits on breastfeeding past a year, that would be great. I know its great to breastfeed past a year, but I am not sure the reasons. So maybe that way, I can tell my husband when the time comes!

by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:07 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Precious333
by Group Admin - Julia on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:14 PM

good resources:

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html

http://www.kellymom.com/store/freehandouts/extended_bf_factsheet.pdf

http://www.llli.org/faq/bflength.html (article called "how long should a mother breastfeed?)

the WHO recommends a minimun of 2 yrs!!!)

Also let him know that breastfeeding is nothing something he could possible undersdtand as a father. Its more than just giving nutrition,its a relationship that developes and that he needs to respect that relationship, even if he feels uncomfortable. Going to LLL meeting will normalize extended bfing as well.

AidiansMommy
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:15 PM

I'm in the same boat as you...No one thinks i should except my SIL

ShadowLark
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:18 PM

My EIGHT MONTH OLD is practically walking up to me and pulling up my shirt!  She took eight steps the day before yesterday!

Your husband has some weird ideas.  Breast milk NEVER loses it's value and your baby will still need mama's comfort (read NURSING) past a year even if it did.

piwife
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:18 PM

well hun good thing he is not the one with the boobs. show him all the resources and if he stilll refused to support your decision. oh well he will get over it. you have us and we will support you!!

lholgate
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:18 PM

I had a similar conversation with DH. I told him that my goal is a year, and I will be happy to make it that long. He agreed that I should nurse for a year. I would like to have our daughter self wean. I also told him, who knows, I may be fed up with nursing by 1 year, and want to wean when I get to that point. The discussion was over then. I didn't really give him anything to argue about because I don't even know how I will feel when the baby is a year or older. If it comes up again and becomes an argument after she's a year, I fully intend on making him be the one to calm her down when she wants to nurse. I am certain he will change his mind then. I'm also counting on her not growing up overnight. I think he will see her as a baby after a year still.

tabi_cat1023
by Group Admin -Tabitha on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:20 PM

kellymom has the great resources...when its gradual he may not even notice unless it comes up and you can always teach nursing manners and teach sign language for milk so baby doesn't pull up your shirt

clo1988
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:24 PM

My husband said the same thing when my son was a little baby. He is now going on 18 months and my husband has no problem with it! My supply is almost completely gone since im pregnant so im trying to wean him a bit bc its starting to hurt. I could have definitly nursed him until 2 but I dried up alot sooner than i thought i would :( After we hit the year mark I think my husband realized nothing really changed bc he had a birthday!

star33
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:29 PM
My body,my decision.the benefits don't change.weaning is a slow process anyway.


Quoting piwife:

well hun good thing he is not the one with the boobs. show him all the resources and if he stilll refused to support your decision. oh well he will get over it. you have us and we will support you!!


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gdiamante
by Gina on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:30 PM

I'm gonna have you turn it on its head. Tell him HE needs to come up with RESEARCH-BASED reasons for you to wean at one year. Unless he does, you will do AS YOU PLEASE.

He won't find any research based reasons for weaning. Not ONE. And his comfort is NOT a reason to do anything.

In the meantime, check out the World Health Organization. And the Susan G Komen Foundation should have some good info as well.

pixiefunk
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:47 PM

This study (news article about) gabe info on the amount of calories before and after 1 year of bfing.

And here kellymom has info on how ~1/2L. of bm contributes to daily values in different things

I agree w/gdiamante he needs to find reasearch or he has no say!

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