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First time anyone complained about my NIP

Posted by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:12 AM
  • 64 Replies

My son is 2 months old now. We have NIP for a whiel and I've gotten NOTHING but POSITIVE comments. I've had tons of peopel come up to me and tell me how great it is and how lucky my son is. Even had one guy tell me he fought with his now ex wife because he wanted his children breastfed.

My parents and myself went on vacation for 4th of july. We stopped at a little mexican restaurant. It was not busy. There were two tables there except for us. We sit down and Ethan has been waiting so I start breastfeeding him right away, seated, in a corner, behind the table, then start helping my other son color his menu. Literally 2 minutes later, I have the manager sneak up to the table and duck down and tell me quietly that I can not continue to do that here.. that they have a room in the back.. that I'm "offending people" and "there are children here"...

I swear I saw red.. It took me a minute to even understand what he was saying.. and the WAY he was saying it? omg. Shit.. there are CHILDREN here? OMG How dare I! I flipped out right away, already upset. I told him if it came down to me feeding my son elsewhere, I would rather leave the restaurant. That he had a RIGHT to eat ANYWHERE I did and that I was NOT doing anything illegal. Then my mother jumped in and confirmed everything I said then asked if it would make him feel more comfortable if I wrapped my son up in a blanket. (Which I had no problem with, the only reason I didnt do it was because my motehr grabbed Ethan while I got my older son and she forgot to grab a blanket.. I just didnt think it would be a big deal since I had a shirt, nursing tank top, and nursing bra on.. so NOTHING was showing. His tone changed so fast.. he started apologizing and I started calming down a bit.

We got the situation figured out and then my father decided to chime in on how we reacted.. apparently I " Flaunt" it in front of other people and "shove it in their faces" that I breastfeed... how the heck... I was wearing half a million layers in extremely hot weather to make OTHER people happy.. I sat down at the table before feeding my screaming son to make OTHER people happy.. I got a blanket and wrapped him up (did NOT cover his head though) to make OTHER people happy.. how am I flaunting anything? I'm feeding my son.

The manager took my meal and my older son's meal off the check I guess to keep us happy. Ugh. The entire situation sucked. And the people who complained didnt even LOOK at me so I could glare. All people want to do is complain when they can act as if it isnt them.. but if its in a public situation like at teh beach.. they just look away because they dont have the guts to say something to my face.

by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:12 AM
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Replies (1-10):
angi07
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:18 AM
I think in my opinion a lot of pro breastfeeding mother's do it in public to see if someone will say something so they can get upset about it and get confrontational. You were in the back not many people in the restaurant imo they were paying to much attention to you,but I don't think getting upset was really nessesary just calmly explain the laws which if they're a manager they know anyway.
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mollysmom328
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:21 AM

If someone tells you that you "cannot continue to do that here"  you have every right to be furious.  99% of pro bfing mothers are NOT NIP because they want a reaction out of people.  That's the biggest bunch of bs I have ever heard.

MamaCeleste0722
by Celeste on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:24 AM
I completely disagree that pro breastfeeding moms do it for someone to confront them. The majority do it because their child NEEDS TO EAT. Period.

Sorry you got confronted, OP. I'd be upset too! It just really irritates me that the confort of others is placed on the shoulders of a nursing mom. But I'm glad the manager let you be and even took the meals off the check.


Quoting angi07:

I think in my opinion a lot of pro breastfeeding mother's do it in public to see if someone will say something so they can get upset about it and get confrontational. You were in the back not many people in the restaurant imo they were paying to much attention to you,but I don't think getting upset was really nessesary just calmly explain the laws which if they're a manager they know anyway.

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MamaCeleste0722
by Celeste on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:25 AM
*comfort* not confort. Sorry!
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Emilita
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:27 AM

Check your state's laws. In my state a mother's right to breastfeed is protected everywhere she can legally be. Some states have more protection than that, some less. I don't know anything about non-US breastfeeding laws. That way the next time something like this happens, you can tell the person all about your legally protected rights. ;)

Dabberdoo
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:34 AM

I cover for my own comfort but if I didn't and somebody suggested it, I wouldn't do it especially considering you had a nursing top on.  You can't see ANYTHING with those things!  Good for you for not allowing yourself to be intimidated. 

I think it behooves nursing moms to be descreet but not hide.  I don't support nursing mother's completely exposing themselves for the sake of making a scene.  I think if your breast is exposed because you need to feed your baby because they won't nurse with a cover or whatnot, fine.  But I don't like it when women unnecessarily expose themselves just to try and cause trouble.  I think that's disrespectful.  But a woman who is descreetly feeding her child shouldn't be harrassed.

boom_maker
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:36 AM

 i do not agree with this at all. i'm VERY pro-breastfeeding and will only NIP when my son is hungry. i always nurse before we leave the house to limit the need to NIP but will not hesitate to feed him if need be, wherever we are.

op, i can see why you were so angry. i'm not confrontational so i don't think i'd say much other than i'm still going to feed my child but if my husband heard it he would be livid and would probably tear someone a new one.

Quoting angi07:

I think in my opinion a lot of pro breastfeeding mother's do it in public to see if someone will say something so they can get upset about it and get confrontational. You were in the back not many people in the restaurant imo they were paying to much attention to you,but I don't think getting upset was really nessesary just calmly explain the laws which if they're a manager they know anyway.

 

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angi07
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:36 AM
I'm sorry I really do disagree dining think op was doing so? No I think they were paying way to much attention. I've been apart of this group for 6 years and that's really just how I feel I've even read that mother's specificly do that. I'm 100% for breast feeding I nursed my kids they never had a bottle or formula but I never nip not because I'm against it at all but I have my reasons for finding other ways. That's just how I feel I'm not wrong its my opinion and everyone has one
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angi07
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:37 AM
Do I * not dinning


Quoting angi07:

I'm sorry I really do disagree dining think op was doing so? No I think they were paying way to much attention. I've been apart of this group for 6 years and that's really just how I feel I've even read that mother's specificly do that. I'm 100% for breast feeding I nursed my kids they never had a bottle or formula but I never nip not because I'm against it at all but I have my reasons for finding other ways. That's just how I feel I'm not wrong its my opinion and everyone has one

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angi07
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:40 AM
Do I think all do? No but some could be very few do yes I'm sorry I've even read it here I've been apart of this group for 6 years in and out between children. I never said op did. I said I think the other table was obviously paying to much attention to her


Quoting boom_maker:

 i do not agree with this at all. i'm VERY pro-breastfeeding and will only NIP when my son is hungry. i always nurse before we leave the house to limit the need to NIP but will not hesitate to feed him if need be, wherever we are.


op, i can see why you were so angry. i'm not confrontational so i don't think i'd say much other than i'm still going to feed my child but if my husband heard it he would be livid and would probably tear someone a new one.


Quoting angi07:

I think in my opinion a lot of pro breastfeeding mother's do it in public to see if someone will say something so they can get upset about it and get confrontational. You were in the back not many people in the restaurant imo they were paying to much attention to you,but I don't think getting upset was really nessesary just calmly explain the laws which if they're a manager they know anyway.

 


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