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My friend says "the thought of a baby sucking on her boobs creeps her out"!

Posted by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 5:46 PM
  • 21 Replies

 I have a friend who is 8 days ahead of me in pregnancy. I'm 14 weeks and 3 days. I'm a huge breastfeeding advocate and all of my friends know this. Anyways, at my fiance's work Christmas party last night, my friend and I were sitting around talking pregnancy and babies. She had told me earlier that day in a text message that her baby's father had made up her mind to breastfeed. I was so happy to hear that. However, during our conversation last night. We got on the topic of bottles and I said there is no need for bottles and ecspically not for atleast the first 6 weeks or so. My friend said "no baby is sucking on my boobs, that is just weird, I will be pumping and bottle feeding." I told her it isn't weird, that it's beautiful and so rewarding and she insisted that it's too creepy for her. I also told her that the chances of you producing enough milk by exclusivly pumping isn't very high.

Anyways, I am just wondering what I can say to her to maybe change her mind a little. Something to ensure her that it isn't weird. What would ya'll say to her?

by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 5:46 PM
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Replies (1-10):
sofia0587
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 5:50 PM
Just educate her because to be honest in the beginning of my pregnancy I felt the same way I was always creeped out at the thought of bf'ing than around the middle of my 2nd trimester after doing a lot of research and speaking to WIC I changed my mind completely and now I can't see myself ever doing anything but breastfeeding.
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maggiemom2000
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 5:56 PM
1 mom liked this

It probably seems wierd to her because she has not known amny, or any women who have breastfed. If you've been around lots of nursing babies, then it is just normal. Can you invite her to go with you to a breastfeeding support group with you (the earlier in her pregnancy the better!) It could be La Leche League or Breastfeeding USA or some independent group.


You could also let her know about the benefits of breastfeeding over pumping and bottle feeding. I think taht most people don't realize taht it ismore than just the milk that provides teh benefits:

From http://thebreastfeedingmother.blogspot.com/2010/10/its-not-about-milk.html

There are some differences between the benefits of being bottle fed breastmilk and being breastfed directly.

For example, your milk has the highest level of antibodies when your baby takes it directly from your breast, and is second-best when it is freshly pumped. Your body actually responds to your baby’s saliva to make milk that is just right for him. If your baby is exposed to something that he needs antibodies for, this is how your body “learns” to make those antibodies for him. The longer it is stored, the more of these antibodies are deactivated. Freezing destroys even more antibodies. (Your frozen milk still provides excellent nutrition and protection for your baby, just not as good as directly from the breast or freshly pumped.)

When breastfeeding directly babies also benefit from appropriate jaw, teeth and speech development as well as overall facial development. The activity of breastfeeding helps exercise the facial muscles. This promotes the development of strong jaws and attractive facial structure. This means that people who were artificially fed may experience more trips to doctors and dentists. Several studies have shown breastfeeding to enhance speech development and speech clarity. Increasing duration of breastfeeding is associated with decreasing risk of later need for braces or other orthodontic treatment. One study showed that overbites (malocclusion) requiring orthodontia could be cut in half if infants were breastfed for one year.

Breastfeeding directly is also less time consuming (no parts to wash, no pumping time plus feeding time). When baby is hungry or needs to be comforted you simply put your baby to the breast. When exclusively bottle feeding breastmilk, you must attend to preparing a bottle first.

Skin on skin contact with your baby is an important part of their development. When you are breastfeeding you have to be in skin on skin contact with your baby. Whether breastfeeding or bottle feeding, make sure you spend some time in skin to skin contact with your baby.

Even when the baby is not actually nursing, skin-to-skin is helpful. Carry your baby a lot, skin to skin whenever possible. It increases mother's milk supply. It helps to "organize" the baby's behavior so that he learns to feed more easily. Babies who are held skin to skin and carried a lot cry less, save their calories for growing (they don’t waste them on crying), and it actually makes them grow better! It stabilizes breathing, heart rate, blood sugar, and temperature.

Finally, it is important to know that many moms who are exclusively pumping for their babies seems to have a harder time maintaining a full milk supply beyond 6 months of age.

mommy2xEK
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 6:01 PM
1 mom liked this
I felt the same way and my mom just dared me to try it out for a few days and if I still felt the same way I could quit. And now on my sec child I thinks its the best thing ever in so many ways....
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larissalarie
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 6:05 PM
I would just encourage her to give direct breastfeeding a try before going the ep route. I thought it would be weird as well, but decided to give it a try and it was "weird"...great weird!
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tabi_cat1023
by Group Admin -Tabitha on Dec. 3, 2011 at 6:20 PM
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She is going into it thinking baby is SUCKING the same way a man does during sex..she is totally confused.  I know many moms who think this way and if they TRY breastfeeding most agree its not the same and not creepy like they thought.

Tell her EPing means pumping eveyr 2-3 hours no matter what even when baby sleeps longer, mom must get up to pump, mom must find a private place to pump, mom must carry pump with her everywhere...its basically tied to her no matter what.  Nursing is freeing, she can nurse where ever and whenever and sleep when baby sleeps.

Hilda_J
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 6:29 PM

I used to be weirded out about it also . Because on my side of the family, nothing but Formula and have a strong opinion about why women shouldn't be breastfeeding. And those opinions was strictly sexualizing them. Trying to make you feel shame about it etc. So I have had that preached to me since I was little. But once I met my bf and seen how the women was for breastfeeding and how beautiful and natural it was everything that was brain washed in me washed away. And I asked questions about it etc. Because I was curious and knew that my bf and I would have kids together , or at least hoped we would later on ( we got together when we was 16 and been stuck together at the hip since) .I mean women in his family has NO shame doesn't care who likes it or not. And I LOVE that about them. And striving to be more confident in my breastfeeding : ) 

abbiedt14
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 6:51 PM

I have had multiple friends say the same. One actually said that she would breastfeed a daughter, but not her sons, because her boobs are for no other man than her husband. Weird, huh? Anyway, I would just explain to her that that's what her breasts are there for. Not for her husband or for looks, but to feed her children.

gdiamante
by Gina on Dec. 3, 2011 at 8:22 PM
2 moms liked this

Perspective.

A BABY sucking on her nipple is weird, yet a machine that works like the ones used on COWS is not?

Ask her to explain that one. And emphasis the milking machine. Dairy farmers haven't done it by hand in a long long long long time.

comf
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 8:31 PM
1 mom liked this
I would just not pressure her too much and just tell her to try it. I thought it was weird too but the I tried it and had an epiphany!
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sreichelt26
by on Dec. 3, 2011 at 8:47 PM

I agree with this. Just explain the benefits and tell her to at least try it the first few days, especially since it'll be colostrum. Chances are once she's done it, she'll see it differently

Quoting tabi_cat1023:

She is going into it thinking baby is SUCKING the same way a man does during sex..she is totally confused.  I know many moms who think this way and if they TRY breastfeeding most agree its not the same and not creepy like they thought.

Tell her EPing means pumping eveyr 2-3 hours no matter what even when baby sleeps longer, mom must get up to pump, mom must find a private place to pump, mom must carry pump with her everywhere...its basically tied to her no matter what.  Nursing is freeing, she can nurse where ever and whenever and sleep when baby sleeps.


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