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OT- baby #2?

Posted by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 6:07 PM
  • 8 Replies
So when I was younger I swore I didn't want kids. Period. Well I now have a 4mo DS that's my whole world. The hubby keeps hinting that he wants one more. I had a terrible pregnancy though, EXTREME hypertension, headaches EVERY day, EXTREME swelling(at one point I gained 25lbs in water swelling in 1 week). Anywho I was miserable. Then I was induced at wk39 Because of hypertension. Was in labor 24.5 hours, had 4 epidurals(thanks to a rookie anesthesiologist.) Then after all that I ended up having a csection. The nursing staff gave DS formula while I was in recovery after I explicitly told them I wanted to ebf. My point being I Just don't know if I could handle having another baby. Guess I Just needed to vent/get opinions.
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by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 6:07 PM
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Replies (1-8):
ceckyl
by Kyla on Jan. 15, 2012 at 6:14 PM

Thats basically how most people feel.  Its only been 4 months.  When the time is right you will feel differently.  I was sworn off babies for at least 5 years until my dd turned one, then I had a total change of heart.

ABZ_O
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 6:19 PM
Thats how I was. I never wanted anykids of my own then when I stopped watching my nephew I ended up wanting one. I'll never have another kid again the pregnancy was a nightmare but it was worth it. I also wanted to breastfeed and not formula feed but my milk supply was low so I had to start out with the formula. My son is my first and only.
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nellyb118
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 6:25 PM
Every pregnancy & delivery is different so just because it was bad last time doesn't mean it will be again. My pregnancy with my second was a lot different than my first. Also with it only being 4 months ago you haven't had much time to forget! I think after a while you kinda get over it or forget how bad it really was.
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gdiamante
by Gina on Jan. 15, 2012 at 6:50 PM

Every pregnancy is different. Considering the issues you had, your doc might give the same advice mine did: Wait. He advised us to wait two years between delivery of the first and conception of the second. As things happened, at the end of the two year interval DH lost his job and was out of work for two years. By the time he was employed again, we knew that another baby was not a practical consideration for us. 

So we have one. As things turned out, that's for the good.

TwinmomAlicia
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:34 PM
Wait. I had twins first with a difficult pregnancy including six weeks of bedrest and PIH. I swore up and down that I was done. When my girls were 3.5 years old, I realized I was ready for one more. You may feel the same, or you may be content with one.
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Gruntlings
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:55 PM
Do you enjoy being a mother? Do you love your child? Do you want your child to have siblings or to be an only child? Are you able to afford another child? Is your DH an involved parent?

Some people only want one child. Nothing wrong with that. Talk with him about it. Discuss your concerns about your health and the health of a second child and how you'd handle pregnancy with a second child while caring for the first.

Either way you want to wait until your first is a bit older. If you wait until your first is at least 18 months old to conceive another child your body has a chance to recover. That gives you a lot of months to discuss and think about and if talking about it right now makes you upset and anxious then he needs to put it on hold for a while and let you focus on motherhood right now rather than make you consider a future hypothetical while you are currently in the harder and less rewarding part of motherhood.
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mama02040608
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:57 PM

 Wait a little while :)  The whole experience is fresh in your mind and you've barely had time to recover!  In a bit, you will be able to objectively say yes or no.  Meantime, enjoy your baby! Every situation, delivery, labor, postpartum is different, so bear that in mind.  You may have a great VBAC or opt for a repeat c/s and the afterward will likely be much different than last time.  I know mine was. 

larissalarie
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 9:00 PM
It's definitely too soon, even if you were certain you wanted more. Wait at least a year so you can bf your little one for sure and not need formula....plus give your body time to heal.
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