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what is he supposed to do?

Posted by on Apr. 24, 2012 at 12:47 AM
  • 21 Replies
I just left for work at 1045. Jacob had been fussy all evening and cluster fed. I had him sleeping. Y 1030 thinking he was out for the night. He woke up as I walked out the door. I just talked to him and he said he gave him the 2 1/2 oz I pumped this evening and thawed more out. And he's still fussy. I told him not to feed him anymore. That it was too much. I'm trying to tell him to rock him, craddle him and use the paci but he's saying he's still restless. Any advice? Dh says he's acting like he hasn't eaten all day. This is making me nervous.
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by on Apr. 24, 2012 at 12:47 AM
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Replies (1-10):
mama_grizz
by on Apr. 24, 2012 at 12:53 AM
Ds did that kinda thing to his sitter, for some reason sucking his (the sitters) finger worked. I guess he wanted skin?
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TheBabyFactory4
by Catherine on Apr. 24, 2012 at 12:58 AM
So am I right to tell dh not to feed him anymore?

Quoting mama_grizz:

Ds did that kinda thing to his sitter, for some reason sucking his (the sitters) finger worked. I guess he wanted skin?
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mostlymaydays
by Group Mod-Stacy on Apr. 24, 2012 at 1:07 AM
4 moms liked this
Dads are notorious for wanting to feed babies to "fix" them quickly. It can take a lot of work and trial and error to figure out how a baby needs to be soothed at any given time. Dads seem to get especially frustrated that what worked yesterday doesn't seem to work today. Dad and baby will find their rhythm, but they both might push the other to their limits in the process. Dad saying "the baby is STILL restless" might be after a 5 minute attempt at the rocker when you know it's going to take at least 15. I swear men have no true concept of time. My husband thinks he can take a shower and get ready in 10 minutes when by my clock it's over 30 minutes in the bathroom every time.
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mama_grizz
by on Apr. 24, 2012 at 1:08 AM
if he just ate I doubt he's hungry. But on the other hand you don't want them both to get too agitated. Maybe tell him to as a last resort, just one oz at a time? I'm not sure... My friend was in the car with ds and had no bottle, I was at a job interview that took longer than anticipated so he had nothing to give him. IMO in that situation I would say since the other avenues were exhausted I would give just a little at a time to get everyone calmed down.
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TheBabyFactory4
by Catherine on Apr. 24, 2012 at 1:25 AM
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Thanks y'all. He got him to sleep by laying next to him with paci. He had it so easy last week when DS slept the whole time I was at. But I was awake with him all day Monday, awake at work overnight, then only slept a little bit on Tuesday because Jacob didn't nap then I worked Tuesday night. I was exhausted and he told me tonight that if he couldn't sleep he would have to take a vacation day tomorrow. He needs to toughen up or say I can be a full-time sahm. He can deal with little sleep on two nights a week just like I do. Jacob has never not allowed me to sleep most of the night when I'm home.
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mostlymaydays
by Group Mod-Stacy on Apr. 24, 2012 at 10:45 AM
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He'll come to know that cuddles with dad and the paci are the dad-equivalent of nursing to sleep with mom. My babies (after 6 months or so) would just konk out lying next to dad while it still took me countless hours of nursing. Maybe babies have lower expectations from dad? ;-). Yes, your dh needs to step up, toughen up and deal, or like you said, you'll need to be a SAHM. *sigh* I'm so over dads "getting to" complain about disturbed sleep while moms are told its part of their job. Geez, like when my dh cooks dinner (burgers on the grill) and his feelings are hurt when everyone doesn't thank him with a ticker tape parade. What about the 29 dinners I make?!? But I will add that I when it comes to small babies, men are intimidated and a gushing "look, honey! You did it and I knew you could!" can go a lonnnng way to keep them trying. Even when they fell short. (also works to boost toddler self-esteem: "look at you coloring in the lines! You're the best!" ;-)


Quoting TheBabyFactory4:

Thanks y'all. He got him to sleep by laying next to him with paci. He had it so easy last week when DS slept the whole time I was at. But I was awake with him all day Monday, awake at work overnight, then only slept a little bit on Tuesday because Jacob didn't nap then I worked Tuesday night. I was exhausted and he told me tonight that if he couldn't sleep he would have to take a vacation day tomorrow. He needs to toughen up or say I can be a full-time sahm. He can deal with little sleep on two nights a week just like I do. Jacob has never not allowed me to sleep most of the night when I'm home.

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justone_jen
by Jen on Apr. 24, 2012 at 10:48 AM
Lol, my mate thinks he gets ready so fast, when in reality, he takes longer than me! :P

Quoting mostlymaydays:

Dads are notorious for wanting to feed babies to "fix" them quickly. It can take a lot of work and trial and error to figure out how a baby needs to be soothed at any given time. Dads seem to get especially frustrated that what worked yesterday doesn't seem to work today. Dad and baby will find their rhythm, but they both might push the other to their limits in the process. Dad saying "the baby is STILL restless" might be after a 5 minute attempt at the rocker when you know it's going to take at least 15. I swear men have no true concept of time. My husband thinks he can take a shower and get ready in 10 minutes when by my clock it's over 30 minutes in the bathroom every time.
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mostlymaydays
by Group Mod-Stacy on Apr. 24, 2012 at 10:55 AM
Oh, he's twice as long getting ready! But I suppose if I took a newspaper into the bathroom with me, that could add 20 minutes to the routine. We'll have 10 minutes to leave the house and 10 minutes later he's just getting in the shower. The underestimate their time when it's concerning their COMFORT ("I only napped for 10 minutes" when it was actually 2 hours) yet overestimate time when it concerns their DISCOMFORT ("the baby cried for an hour straight" when it was really just two 7 minute periods of fussiness).


Quoting justone_jen:

Lol, my mate thinks he gets ready so fast, when in reality, he takes longer than me! :P



Quoting mostlymaydays:

Dads are notorious for wanting to feed babies to "fix" them quickly. It can take a lot of work and trial and error to figure out how a baby needs to be soothed at any given time. Dads seem to get especially frustrated that what worked yesterday doesn't seem to work today. Dad and baby will find their rhythm, but they both might push the other to their limits in the process. Dad saying "the baby is STILL restless" might be after a 5 minute attempt at the rocker when you know it's going to take at least 15. I swear men have no true concept of time. My husband thinks he can take a shower and get ready in 10 minutes when by my clock it's over 30 minutes in the bathroom every time.

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tabi_cat1023
by Group Mod - Tabitha on Apr. 24, 2012 at 11:04 AM

YEP!!! This is so true

Quoting mostlymaydays:

Dads are notorious for wanting to feed babies to "fix" them quickly. It can take a lot of work and trial and error to figure out how a baby needs to be soothed at any given time. Dads seem to get especially frustrated that what worked yesterday doesn't seem to work today. Dad and baby will find their rhythm, but they both might push the other to their limits in the process. Dad saying "the baby is STILL restless" might be after a 5 minute attempt at the rocker when you know it's going to take at least 15. I swear men have no true concept of time. My husband thinks he can take a shower and get ready in 10 minutes when by my clock it's over 30 minutes in the bathroom every time.


justone_jen
by Jen on Apr. 24, 2012 at 11:07 AM
So true!

Quoting mostlymaydays:

Oh, he's twice as long getting ready! But I suppose if I took a newspaper into the bathroom with me, that could add 20 minutes to the routine. We'll have 10 minutes to leave the house and 10 minutes later he's just getting in the shower. The underestimate their time when it's concerning their COMFORT ("I only napped for 10 minutes" when it was actually 2 hours) yet overestimate time when it concerns their DISCOMFORT ("the baby cried for an hour straight" when it was really just two 7 minute periods of fussiness).




Quoting justone_jen:

Lol, my mate thinks he gets ready so fast, when in reality, he takes longer than me! :P





Quoting mostlymaydays:

Dads are notorious for wanting to feed babies to "fix" them quickly. It can take a lot of work and trial and error to figure out how a baby needs to be soothed at any given time. Dads seem to get especially frustrated that what worked yesterday doesn't seem to work today. Dad and baby will find their rhythm, but they both might push the other to their limits in the process. Dad saying "the baby is STILL restless" might be after a 5 minute attempt at the rocker when you know it's going to take at least 15. I swear men have no true concept of time. My husband thinks he can take a shower and get ready in 10 minutes when by my clock it's over 30 minutes in the bathroom every time.

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